Day 1 again....sigh

Made my first 10 days alcohol free in January. Then… after feeling great! I figured…eh…I can have an occasional glass of wine, ECT, and handle it. From what I’ve read here, it’s a very common mistake. My habit has usually been binge drinking, and most often not to the point of drunkeness. Until 5 years ago… too long of a story…I loss the love of my life… and all that was our 30 years together in quick succession shortly after that. Not an excuse… just a history. I have bipolar 2 and PTSD…and am happily ( albeit crazzily ) remarried to a wonderful man who also has bipolar 2 … but who never drinks.
So, my relapse started with a glass of wine for a couple nights, then 2. And the last week our so ended up with a fifth of whiskey each night. Why? Simply cause I like it, especially whiskey. It’s winter, I’m depressed and bored at night… and the excuses continue to pile up. But…i feel like total crap! And I know I’m slowly killing myself.
So… this is my second Day number 1 . Would love to hear any common experiences (Or ANY experiences), successes, and advice? Thanks😁

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Hang in there. Don’t give up. Go to meeting. If , you have time double up on the meetibgs. Call your sponsor. Relapse is part of recovery. Check in everyday . I decided to check in on site everyday today .

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I hear you on the one glass turns to 2 glasses. That’s y I need to be sober full stop, I would love to have a bottle in the fridge and have a glass every few days but with me it’s the whole bottle gone. Sometimes 2, every night.

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I’ve had many day ones. The fact that you are being honest with yourself *and us who understand, and can see the lies and excuses we tell ourselves…are pushing you closer to being successful. No matter how much time each of us has, we all have a day at a time. Make sure you start looking into as many resources as you can to help you on your sober journey. There are some great meetings, books, Ted Talks on YouTube, support groups and counseling, meditations, and spiritual growth and healing aspects as well.

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Thank you everyone. Especially for the other resourse ideas. Physically going to meetings isn’t any option for me at this time. But anything online is very powerful. And I do have a few sponsors who themselves are living in recovery. Reading others honestly and experiences seems to be the most powerful for me so I really appreciate it. I live in Maine and there are 30 days left until SPRING …so that is a definite positive!
Tonight there’s no booze in the house, and I’m grateful we live far enough from town to be a deterrent for me to bother going out. Plan on telling Hubby tomorrow I don’t want to grocery shop alone for a while till I’m past the temptation to hit that isle of the grocery store… lol!
Thanks again, and I of courseyour as having a successful e evening as well​:wink::heart:

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Hello everyone… I’m back again… I was 4mths Jan-May without a drink * then decided hey I think I can have 1 and drink like normal people… that lasted for a short time…I was not excessively drinking BUT I didn’t control the urge NOT to drink…I’m on day 1 and I’m just going to take it one day at a time…

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