Hello Everyone,
I didn’t see a topic on this and wanted to share my story about telling my mother that I have a drinking problem. I have been dry for a little over four months and for the first time, I can actually imagine a life without alcohol.
When I first decided to quit drinking, I didn’t tell anyone. I had thought about cutting back, quitting, getting help so many times before that it felt pointless to tell people about it when I didn’t believe I would last more than a 24 hours. Since then, more people know about my alcoholism than I ever imagined. However, I was fully prepared to (and thought I could) hide this from my mom for the rest of my life.
Like most people, I feel ashamed, guilty, and weak because of my alcoholism. But mostly, I felt like I was letting her down. She has two other sons, (my half brothers), who both suffer from addiction issues. One is in prison for a decision he made while high and drunk and the other is a meth addict. Needless to say, I saw how their addictions hurt her and I was determined not to do the same.
My mom and I just finished a trip in Europe, and as you can imagine, my mom was a little confused about why I was never drinking. Mostly because she had never known me to refuse a drink. About a week in I was tired of her asking me why, so I just sort of word-vommited to her that I wasn’t drinking anymore. She kept asking me why until I told her I was an alcoholic. She cried.
Since I told her, it has been wonderful. I have been able to make jokes about it (my form of coping), talk to her about my half-brothers with my hands on experience, and not have to lie about who and what I am. She has given me nothing but support and I am really glad I told her.
I’m sure my fear of disclosing is not unique. I hope that this story (and others are welcome to share theirs), encourages others to take a leap of faith with their family and loved ones about their addiction.
-Elliot