Facing lonliness

“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says I’m possible” Audrey Hepburn

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Beautiful words & exactly what I’m doing now. We are both 17 days sober too :smile: Go us! Let’s keep at it.

Keep focused on this theme of cleansing. Inner & outer cleansing. See yourself being sober, see yourself being happier & healthier, see yourself being independent & enjoying it, see yourself dropping all negative habits & people, see yourself manifesting all of this into being. You have the power to shape your experience, your life. You just have to tap into it. Get through the loneliness without medicating & you will find a priceless treasure on the other side. You! A person who is whole & doesn’t need anything or anyone else to feel complete. Then you can attract healthy relationships that add love, peace & positivity to your life not the opposite.

All the best. :smile: You got this!

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Thank you! So true :slight_smile: best wishes to you on your journey. Lets make this our year.

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Hang in there. I know exactly how you feel. I’ve been having marital problems for several months now. Even though we say we’re working on things I don’t think I’ve ever been more lonely… It also hasn’t helped my recovery process. I’ve had relapse after relapse in the last month. Be stronger than I have…

I’m sorry to hear that you have been struggling. Glad you are still here and trying as that speaks volumes. It is super difficult breaking ties with someone you love(d). I don’t know your specific situation but I know how painful it is to lose someone you truly care about. It’s a massive ongoing trigger. I guess we just have to keep our heads up and keep venting… keeping it in is always what leads me to make bad choices, so not doing that this time.

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I’m at 47 days sober. From drinking and my ex. Had a relapse and text my ex on Valentine’s Day since then I’ve gone no contact again. Still trying to sort through all the emotions and getting better from the toxic relationship I had with him and drinking. But I started reading a book that has been very beneficial it’s called getting past your breakup by Susan j. Elliott. I strongly recommend getting your hands on it.

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I will check that book out. Good for you, you should be proud of yourself… I know how hard both things are to quit… keep going girl :grin:

You too. It definitely feels like de-toxicing. Alcohol has been easier to quit then him. Some days it still hurts so much. But I know I need time to heal and not jumping into someone else’s arms to try and repair the damage.

On the same page as you completely.

I have heard of that book and was seriously considering picking it up. I found her videos on Youtube helpful after one breakup. Sounds like a good recommendation.

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I have been struggling with alcohol for years and this time has been the longest I have ever been clean. Had a relapse three days ago because of suppressed feelings and wanting to smother all the emotions out. Feeling more positive than all the previous times, but scared of the loneliness. Finding all kinds of websites, reading material and forums like on this app to try and help me stay sober even when feeling sad and lonely.

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@rozbeets

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Its like excerpts of my story! I’ve been extremely lonely lately… but then again, I’ve always been lonely. This is more just an ‘openly lonely’ type of feeling. Personally, I’ve embraced the reality of loneliness because it feels better than the drunken illusion of security and false friendships.

EVERYTHING has changed sober but mostly my relationships. Even the ones that I’ve found comfort in have grown distant because the foundation was built around drinking.

For now, I choose sober loneliness over the security over toxic relationships. HOWEVER, I wouldn’t be here without the growing friendships that I’ve begun cultivating on here.

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Go to meetings and network and fill your days. There are a lot of us who feel that way…But feelings aren’t facts and will pass.

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I want to do the relationship inventory to alcohol. Try to put that relationship under the microscope and take it for what it is.

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I really struggle the most with maintaining interest in Apps so don’t really use them. I found one useful article on Google about the first steps in recovery, but unfortunately can’t upload it here. I am really into cooking, reading and exercising though; what I did was use Google and Facebook to look up any new types of exercise and recipes that I could try to keep me busy. It doesn’t work for everyone obviously, but worth a try if you have any hobbies or passions that you enjoy :blush:

It is true that you actually feel more secure and kind of more relaxed knowing that there is nothing and no one to worry about anymore with regards to toxic drinking relationships. I did realize that I was pushing away people that do actually care about my recovery though, so am slowly but surely teying to build on those relationships that do mean something to me. Doesn’t always go so amazingly as one would hope haha, as nothing worth it is easy. Trying my best to cope better when I’m alone or feeling very lonely, even if it is mostly finding escape in books, movies or hobbies

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"Detoxing from a person…"
Interesting way of putting it.

Hi @Leah3721. Is the book geared toward a female perspective or is it not gender specific. I’ve been crushed and heartbroken since losing my wife of 15 years in January. I just can’t get over her.

I’m sorry for your loss. And the book isn’t gender specific however it is written by a woman. It has been a huge help to me. And I may be picking through it again soon. Lots of helpful advice in it