I just celebrated my first year of sobriety yesterday and while I’m happier now than I can remember being I’m also scared that with the novelty of sobriety wearing off I may be tempted to drink again. My husband is supportive but still drinks a few every weekend. My mom, who lives nearby, actually sent me an article about how drinking prevents dementia yesterday. My sister, who I’m visiting this weekend, told me it would be fine if I had a glass of wine every now and then and suggested we visit a brewery. I want to stay the course but I’m not getting much support.
I’d appreciate some advice on how to get through this. I’m not a 12-stepper - it’s just not for me.
3 Likes
Drinking is causing a new type of dementia actually. I have been on dementia awareness courses.
Binge drinking and blackouts can cause ARBD - alcohol related brain damage and it is becoming more and more common given the volumes middle aged people are drinking. They at least are the age bracket which drinks the most in the UK.
Stay sober for you rather than worry about drinking to satisfy them. This is your life, your journey, you’ve got the steering wheel, so drive straight ahead, keep going and don’t turn back.
Statistically when you make it a year the chances of relapse reduce by over 50%, whilst that’s just a statistic, look at how strong you have been to get this far, keep getting stronger, be confident with your sobriety and enjoy the life you are creating for yourself.
6 Likes
I have to believe that not drinking is healthier than drinking. I know it is for me. I always wonder who finds these studies - the Council for Better Boozing?
I suspect that my sobriety is making my family think about their own habits although I’ve never talked to them about their drinking and wouldn’t unless they brought it up.
Honestly sometimes I feel like the world is set up to start me drinking again.
4 Likes
I often think it’s people justifying their problems with these articles.
You have only yourself to think about here, what others think is simply what they think, you know what you know and a year sobriety is a better education than a stupid article.
Stay strong, you are doing great.
5 Likes
I’m so glad a friend suggested this app. This community is just what I need. Thanks for the boost and for listening
4 Likes
No problem, theres lots of great advice on here.
I always think, why leave life in recovery which has already given me more in 448 days than 16 years of drinking ever gave me.
In recovery I waken everyday knowing what I did last night and the night before that and I no longer carry the guilt, shame and remorse crazy drunk me carried around and kept adding more and more of that heavy weight.
Now we are free from those shackles we shall not voluntarily put ourselves back in them.
Get confident with being sober, be firm but fair, set your boundaries and let your family know you mean business.
Have a great day.
5 Likes
I know drinking got me nowhere. My life has opened up in ways I couldn’t have imagined. I’m stronger than I thought. I can’t imagine that this upward trajectory can keep going forever tho.
3 Likes
I never made it to a year, I got to 8 months and 6 months a few years back and I relapsed thinking I could be a ‘normal’ drinker. For me personally it just didn’t happen and it made me feel so low, throwing away that time. I don’t know if it was nostalgia or the alcoholic voice within me convincing me that it would be fun to drink again but it wasn’t true and I’m determined more than ever to stay sober now. It’s your life and you shouldn’t sacrifice you hard earned year in sobriety to please others. Go back to the person you were that made you want to stop drinking in the first place and remember how you felt back then.
4 Likes
That’s right. My partner’s uncle has dementia caused by long term alcohol abuse.
I suppose the small amounts of alcohol that could be of benefit may be true for normal drinkers. But for me, my drinking would only cause more mental and physical problems.
1 Like
Someone posted a perfect little analogy on here that I read last week.
This was perfectly put.
9 Likes
Im lucky that my husband quit with me. Im over a year in and some days i still fear i will relapse. I don’t know if it will go away. I still stay away from places full of it and people. Last Halloween my cousin offered me a beer, i had to sit there and look at him and my grandma reminded him that i was in Sobriety.
1 Like
Not sure what article it was but the reporting of health research in the media is often awful.
I heard one of the scientists talking about it on the radio and she said that although there was an association between being teetotal and dementia risk, this could be because of heart disease and other illnesses in that group. Basically it’s correlation not causation! Studies don’t look at all inputs so there could a number of other mitigating factors e.g. lifestyle or genetics that have a role.
Found this article which is a bit more balanced than some I’ve seen www.independent.co.uk/news/health/wine-alcohol-dementia-middle-age-teetotal-abstinence-a8473351.html%3Famp
The most important part of the study was that excessive drinking is a high risk factor for developing dementia. If you’re here I imagine your options are not drinking at all or drinking to excess. Which would you prefer? And if you’re drinking to excess, are you even going to get old enough to develop dementia? Age is the biggest risk factor and alcohol (plus everything that goes with it… Not eating well, not exercising, worse mental health, risky behaviour) are huge risk factors for cutting life short.
If you’re happier now than you can remember then that’s great! Congratulations on your year, looking forward to the day I can say the same 