On June 1, 2021 I received my 2 year chip, and think of how time flies. I remember the first year, and especially the “firsts” of celebrating without alcohol including pontoon rides, birthdays, holidays, but that first summer was rough. I was bitter, angry, almost went through the stages of grief. The youtube videos to which I listened really helped that summer, especially the funnier ones. Those people got me laughing when I didn’t feel like it.
June 1 of 2020 was weird b/c - Pandemic, but I ordered my 1 year coin, at the strong urging of my husband, from Amazon. They have all kinds of coins. By that time of course I had gotten over my rage and depression and all the strong negative feelings like I had felt in the summer of 2019.
June 1, 2021 I was fortunate I was able to see my former home group in Arizona to get my 2-year chip, and then realized how fast time flew by. I now live in Durango, CO, attend meetings here, and I look back on how life has been and speculate how icky it would still be if I were still drinking. There’s been lots of transition that formerly I would have used as an excuse to drink. Selling homes, packing everything up, relocating, and lots of movement. Some embrace change, and I’m working on it, but it takes me out of my comfort zone.
And then I think, I’m returning to college. The last time I attended school was 30 years ago, and I’m invigorated. The move to Durango would not have happened if I were still drinking. My wonderful husband would have said “you’re not coming.”, and rightly so. This is a golden opportunity for him, and certainly my drinking would have ruined it, so absolutely looking back I would think he would have said something along those lines. Self-Preservation.
But as much as I cherish my sobriety, I wasn’t going to make a big deal out of 2 years and then heard a speaker say, acknowledging milestones shows to others who are newer in recovery that it is possible. So, dear ones, just know it is possible - just one day at a time. Don’t look forward to speculate on where you might be in 2 years or 30 days or 10 years, just focus on today.
Much Love to All!
In Peace & Serenity,
Jim
