When I quit alcohol at the beginning of 2022, the goal was simple; Dont die. I already spent a week in the hospital due to pancreatitis, and later developed severe neuropathy in both legs making even walking to the bathroom a chore. I was over alcohol, and I knew I had to quit for both me and my family - but I couldn’t do it alone; I needed something to help the cravings. So, I turned to Marijuana, and things were great - per-se. I was able to fit my urges for alcohol into the weed box and I had no desire to look back. That is, until we decided to have children earlier this year. I knew time with weed was numbered as being a good dad and smoking daily don’t mix - and that’s not the kind of father I would ever want to be. So now the baby is due in 1 month - and I promised my wife that now is the time to make my stand. That in mind, I understand that weed is far from the hardest drug to quit, but since I so closely tied it to my alcohol addiction, I am now concerned that I will relapse on weed, alcohol, or both.
Just looking for advice on others that have gone through something similar? How do I make this all work?
First of all way to go on your addiction free time and congrats on your baby.
I see how the relationship between weed and alcohol can be interchangeable. You have gone 600 days with retraining your mind away from alcohol. Your habits with drinking have changed.
Focusing on freeing yourself of weed…make sure your home is weed free. Stay way from temptations. With a baby on the way, I’m sure you are super busy with preparations and will also be very busy once the baby arrives. Make sure you don’t have idle time to indulge mentally in your DOC’s.
Support groups help as you can talk out your urges and work through the urges. I have found that this community has been very supportive and helpful in my journey. Take time to read around and jump in when comfortable. The Checking in daily to maintain focus #60 thread is one of my favorites to stay connected here and also to stay accountable.
Wish you luck on your journey and do hope to see you around
Remember in the end what science says marijuana is: an addictive depressant with well documented short and long term side effects. Actually that sounds a lot like what alcohol is, doesn’t it?
And what you are realizing is that there is a difference between parading around as alcohol free and actually being sober. The supposed well meaning forces of marketing and social justice have tried to blind people to what marijuana really is…
In the most general terms ask yourself if being a pothead is really what you want for yourself?
Yeah I believe I diluted myself into believing this would be different, but it isn’t. I still sit around all day doing nothing but smoking. I told myself it was ok because it wasn’t booze, but that’s just another way to justify not just smoking multiple times a day but spending ungodly amounts of money on it… time to make a real change
Thanks so much! I’m very excited to be a father but you’re correct - being a pot head is not at all the kind of example I want to set. I guess I’m just scared of what is going to happen when I stop. Like has all this sober time really been a “lie” because I was smoking the entire time? I’m afraid I don’t actually know what it’s like to manage addiction since I’ve been kicking that can road for quite a while now. Either way I’m extremely thankful for this community in that I finally feel like I have a place to talk to someone. So thanks so much for replying!
Welcome @Spitfire0o0 and congrats on your sober time from alcohol and the new baby on the way. I too replaced alcohol for weed. Its possible to put both down. It may be uncomfortable at the beginning but sobriety gets better
Think I can relate a bit to your feelings regarding kind of anxiety or fear. A book called “The tools” from Phil Stutz helped me to understand key matters around this topic plus if you give it a real chance and seriously perform suggested practices, it will finally kick in and work like a charm. It will just take a while. What might be a problem though once baby is born is potential lack of energy from nights when your baby demands attention - of course your partner will cover most of such moments at the beginning due to obvious reasons, but let’s be real and prepare yourself for periods when you’re going to feel exhausted, and on top of that staying sober and stay away from alcohol and weed. Big challenge ahead of you, certainly not impossible just think of a plan what you’re going to do in such moments. Best of luck and don’t pressure yourself in your new role as a father there’s nothing like a perfect father, no school around this topic, learn by doing with open heart
