70 days sober now the hubby decided to quit drinking with me!


#1

My husband never had an “alcohol problem” compared to me but …be drank on social occasions even since I’ve been sober. We had a party sat night where drinking was involved and of course I stayed sober ! My friends had their fun but they were all very supportive of my decision and even went as far as to say they wish they could do the same :grin: anywho… mu hubby woke up feeling a little sluggish and opened up saying he realizes he is depressed after a night of drinking and he’s done with it. Mind you I have never asked him to quit just because I did. I feel like this is a huge milestone there is nothing like having my everyday partner be on the same page as me. I feel like he has seen how great I have been feeling and decided he wants a taste of that lifestyle! Has anyone else experienced this ?? How did it happen and has it made your relationship better??


#2

That seems like a mixed bag of skittles if it works or not. But you both will need to separate your sobriety from one another. as your only able to control your own urges. You can both play accountable partners. I hope it works out for ya. Maybe it will help make it easier on you…


#3

Sounds positive!.
My wife drank socially with me but doesn’t like how she feels the following day… since I’ve stopped she has stopped as it was me who bought the wine:)
It has made things a lot easier


#4

Thank you!! I feel like it can only be positive since me stopping wasn’t for him or based on him and him stopping was solely his choice :hugs::hugs: and it was a similar dynamic, he would drink more when I was drinking and now that im not doing it i think he has had an opportunity to see it for what it really is lol


#5

You are correct lol and although I have been super good I feel like with him jumping on board it will make it that much easier but I’ve built up enough independent strength so if he changes his mind and drinks I will not flip on him or make it a big deal, I told him I’m not going to be the bird in his ear telling him what he can and can’t do my sobriety is mine and his… is his.


#6

Sounds absolutely brilliant. Wish you both happy sobriety together xx


#7

Yes and yes! My wife said she just didn’t feel like drinking anymore. I never had any problem with her drinking around me. I would buy her wine and open it and pour her a glass. Doesn’t mean it wasn’t super cool when she said she did t want to anymore:)


#8

She’s a Normie BTW


#9

That is beautiful!!!


#10

Only 3 days in, but my non-alcoholic husband is doing it with me. I can’t tell you how helpful that is. We’re building a new way of living together. I did not ask him to, and I don’t really know his reasons. I’m just grateful to him for his support. He does like his bourbon and beer, so he’s giving up something he likes, but doesn’t have a problem with, like I do.

I am so happy for you, I’m sure your husband’s support will be so helpful. And kiddos to you for staying sober at your party! That’s amazing.


#11

yep, I don’t mind my partner drinking around me although I did ask him to not get rip roaring drunk around me because it’s annoying. And when I stopped, he slowed down. He still has a beer every now and then but doesn’t go crazy and sometimes goes a month or 2 without it. Congrats on 70 days!


#12

Awww… that’s wonderful to hear. I don’t know you but it sounds like you are having a really good relationship with your partner. He will be even more supportive and I’m sure your partnership will get even better and closer. All the best to you. Your story is a real heart warmer :wink:


#13

My husband has definitely cut back, but idk if he will ever quit. I know he’s disappointed with my sobriety in some ways, but I’m not! Day 106 for me.


#14

My husband is much more aware of his drinking and cutting back a bit, but he has no intention of quitting. I am fine with that, if that is what he wants. I am on day 362. :heart::heart:


#15

Congratulations on your 106 days!!! It sucks he’s not excited about your sobriety… before i quit my husband would always end up being ok with my drinking and even going as far as to buy me bottles of vodka as gifts knowing I will likely get blackout drunk and we will have issues, he would always say "you don’t need to quit, just control it and listen to me when I say you had enough " so instead of seeing it as me actually having a real issue he seen it as me going out of my way to not listen or pace myself. When I decided to quit for good he had some reservations as always because we live in a alcohol fueled culture but over time he began to understand I can’t have just one and he can’t help by being my drink monitor becuase it creates co dependency issues… do you act differently towards him now that your sober ? I know I did at first because alot of underline issues were coming to surface and I had to face them head on and talk about them. He was use to me just dusting it under the rug and creating a new issue with a night of drinking :nauseated_face::persevere:


#16

Congratulations on 362 days !!! I cant wait to get there !!! Keep up the excellent work and if hubby can do it responsibly power to him!! I wish I could !!


#17

My wife has never had anything like a drinking problem, but when I quit, she quit. It is great to have that solidarity for sure! And I know I quit because ii5 needed to, so no matter what she decides in the future, it’s all good by me. I know what I gotta do!

Thank goodness for that support, and best to the two of you!


#18

Honest, when I quit, I didn’t know I would make it this far. I also didn’t think it would be for good. The more I read about alcoholism, the physical addiction to it, and the ill health that accompanies it, the stronger my resolve to stay sober became. I was quiet about what I was attempting but keep at it by not drinking. This is a new and second marriage for us and he’s a good man and treats me like gold. He just misses someone to “celebrate” with. I don’t think I act differently, just more fun, happy, content and much healthier on a daily basis.