71 days and struggling

71 days and counting. As I posted before, I still count the liquor stores on my home every night. But now this Covid19 virus and being a cop is so *ucking stressful. Everyone around me… “can’t go out… Can’t make plans… Screw it drink and chill at home” I am glad that I am essential staff and that I am forced to go to work and it certainly helps distraction. I feel weird asking, but I need strong willed people that know where I am coming from to boot me in the ass and keep me in line and I hope I can start with the help here. Honestly, people in my life have no idea I am struggling with this. Only the people reading this. Thank you for taking the time to read, and don’t be gentle if you respond. I need it.
B

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Hey i know what your going through, im on 125 days and after day 60 i have had the same feelings. You’re right about being an essential employee does help. Staying distracted is key and stopping the cycle. If you want to take your sobriety serious, tell your loved ones what you are going through. It hold you accountable for your further actions. Trust me with eveything going on, i would love to be home and drink, but i know i would be on a bender until the covid19 is over. Or maybe never stop again. Keep your head up!

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You got this dude! Every day is an achievement. And thank you for your job. Be safe out there. Every distraction is important. A busy mind keeps a peaceful soul is what I think. Living in the moment. One of my biggest stress triggers I think was always worrying about the future. I would stress about it till I had enough vodka in me to numb it or just completely forget about it. I was a “whole bottle a night of anything” Alcoholic. It took so long to finally get sober. Way too long.
Don’t know if this helps but know I’m in your corner. Cheering for ya. :v:

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Definitely stay in the now man.
At this time your life must be chaotic enough. Do you really need to add drinking into the mix? I don’t think so bud.
Your a cop. People rely on you. Be the person the public think you are mate.
Especially now in these uncertain times.
71 days is great work. But it’s still early days. So you will still be thinking things like that. I found accepting where I found myself to be a great release. Given time and daily acceptance, you can live a happy “normal” life.
I am.

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Thank you for your service!! 71 days is a great achievement. You have to keep in mind that you’re essential every minute of every day during this pandemic. There’s no time for you to drink. What happens if you give in and drink, then your coworkers come down with this virus. You’ll have to be doing double shifts. How the hell are you going to do that while drinking? You’re in a position where you have to be ready to go in a moment’s notice. Stay strong!! Come on here and vent. We’re all here rooting for you!!

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Hey B, you got this…just keep your head down and push through your addictive thoughts. I’m 83 days sober and i get you 100% but we are stronger together so it’s great you reached out. I have been hitting back to back meetings on In the Rooms, its really helping me keep my focus while im stuck at home.

There is a 24 hour NA marathon today so lots of opportunity to share and get some support.

Stay strong :heart:

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Thank you all for your words. Like Dori says… Just keep swimming!!!

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