I found what I was looking for in that bottle! I GOT IT! AA and the 12 steps have it to me!
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Beautiful post…thanks so much for sharing your experience!
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All of the advice and shared experiences has made me so happy. I thank all of you so much!! I thank you for being completely open about each of your situations. This has helped more than you know. So much love to you all 
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I feel the same way when I’m with my circle and they start drinking. I know I’d relapse HARD if I ever do take that sip.
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I’m still new to sobriety. 82 days. My husband still drinks, tries not to around me but I’ve told him that it’s fine if he does. I’ve talked to him about boundaries too. One beer is fine around me but anything more or harder than that, I AM NOT COMFORTABLE WITH IT. When we go out with friends or family, he always stays with me so I’m not alone but I’ve come to terms with my life and sobriety. I AM IN CONTROL and I DO NOT HAVE TO HAVE THAT SHOT! Have you told him about certain boundaries?
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For me:
I had to learn that I am NOT in control. That’s what makes me an alcoholic. I can’t stop drinking by selfwill. I have tried every possible way. That was the insanity.
I came to believe that a power greater than my self could restore me to sanity. I came to believe this because I was powerless over alcohol. Alcohol was my master.
The most insane thing I ever did I did of sound and sober body and mind. That was to think I could successfully drink again and enjoy myself this time. This time it will be different and I’ll control my drinking. That is insanity. Only a power greater than myself could relieve me of that.
It was very dangerous for me to believe I could self control this disease away. I only overcame my disease through the spiritual program of AA. No self help program could have relieved my alcoholism.
The first thing I do as an alcoholic is the first step. the only step of the 12 that does not require God. Admitted I was POWERLESS over alcohol and that my life had become unmanageable.
Food for thought
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Thanks for that. I know everyone’s path is different but that’s what I tell myself over and over again so I don’t relapse. I know I may relapse at any given moment but so far, saying this to myself helps ME. I’m still new to sobriety so I apologize for offending anyone.
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Not offended at all. I just feel that it’s vital I share my experience with trying to control my disease on my own. I almost lost my freedom and much more trying to self control alcoholism. The 12 steps were the answer for me. Anything that works for you right now is awesome! I would definitely suggest getting a sponsor and getting through the 12 steps. The great part about the steps is that the obsession to drink will be removed. You won’t have triggers or any desires to drink. Of course you have to maintain spiritual fitness for that to stay. The relief is amazing though. I’m a recovered alcoholic. Meaning the obsession is gone. I can be around alcohol id I have a reason to be somewhere that it’s being served or sold and I don’t desire it. Ive been placed in a position of neutrality
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I can relate to this 
!!!
My wife and I got sober together about 6 years ago. I stayed sober…she unfortunately could not.
I toughed it out up until this last year, eventually things got so bad between us that our relationship was non-existent.
In the end I made the choice to leave, and when I left I made the choice to drown my own feelings of guilt, horror and sorrow with drugs and alcohol.
I threw away years of sobriety because I could not handle the pain of losing the one person I cared about.
My advice to you is to work with him as much as possible without harming your own recovery.
If he cannot get sober, you may have to let him know that you can no longer be a part of his life until he does, which is the hardest thing you might ever have to do.
I’ve got 21 days sober now…and I can promise you that if you do have to leave, the pain does go away eventually. I can also tell you that if the pain of leaving him seems so unbearable that you begin to question your own sobriety… don’t.
Drinking and drugs made the pain sooooooo much worse everytime I woke up from the bender before, that I began to question living.
Reach out to people here, and really try to tap into the things that make you happy outside of the relationship you have with you husband.
This recover community has saved my life and given me a second chance. I still am depressed and lonely as fuck, but I can finally see a light at the end of the tunnel and I’m going to keep walking until that light opens up to a brand new existence.
The only regret I have at this point is not letting my wife know how much I loved her each and everyday that we did have together.
I send all my love to you and your husband.
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That’s a very kind and caring response. I am sorry about your marriage and relapse and glad you are back at sobriety. Sharing our experiences and supporting eachother can be such a powerful heaing process. Thank you.
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Great stuff @Shoyu and @SobeeDad
Thanks for the shares. It seems in the end we all have to be comfortable around alcohol. I know I do because it’s everywhere. I like to go out to eat. I like sports events and concerts. I like my wife 
. Alcohol is everywhere. To go off topic a bit. I really enjoy the fact I’m not in that long line buying beer or pissing it away and missing half the game or concert. Poor bastards in the long line to to a whizzer. 
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Yes I have. He drink in the garage. Which is fine. But then he is obviously drunk I get annoyed… thank you for your response