Addicted from youth

Hi everyone. My name is Bradley. I’m 23 years old and I’ve been an alcoholic since I was 15. Usually when I tell people this i get made fun of or people tell me to shut up and hand me a beer. It isn’t until the end of the night when they quickly realized I’m not lying. Growing up i would see my father slam down 20 beers a night. Even on a weeknight. I figured it was normal. For some reason it just became normality. Since 15 I ruined everything. The moment my lips touched the bottle I couldn’t stop. I drank everyday. Dropped out of school (which I’ve since went back and completed last year) and neglected all advice from my family. Of course with alcohol and the stigma around it, it led me to so many other problems and substances. I’ve essentially ruined my life before my 25th birthday and about 2 weeks ago I made a decision to quit drinking and quit doing drugs.
The damage I’ve done to my body and mind is nothing compared to the adjustment I have to make everyday to just fit in. Or even to just have normal thoughts in my head. I’m so lucky to have an amazing family. Although I’m friendless. I found this website a week ago and I’ve been reading the stories on here. It’s an absolute inspiration. People from all walks of life just trying to happiness and sobriety. It’s almost beautiful.
I would love to hear if their is anyone out there like me who got caught up at an early age. What had you triggered and sucked in?
For me it was my friends. At the time my dad become out of control at home my cousin had died in an accident and I needed an escape so I left for months at a time. Not showing up for school and just finding comfort within these friends that where much older. I now see a physiologist a couple times a week to find out what I’m really escaping from. Everyday is a new struggle and another battle to maintain what I’ve worked so shortly for. I can’t wait and hope to hear others stories similar to mine. Or to just hear anyone’s triumphs they achieve everyday. When that clock strikes another day I find a brief moment of solace.
Thank you.

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Hey man, welcome. And congratulations on making the decision to get sober. I’ve only been at the lifestyle 51 days, but in my 36 years of life it’s the best decision I’ve ever made. Good on you being young and realizing it now.

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Thank you!! It means a lot. 51 days is amazing! You should be proud of yourself. I can’t imagine how good I’ll feel at that point. I see the destructive path all of this had lead to. It’s time to put a stop to it. Keep it up! One day at a time!

I’m proud everyday as you should be. One day at a time is right. If you have something you love doing immerse yourself in it. I’m a golf and a musician, both fun things to do while drinking, even more fun sober. I’m better a both since I stopped. So if you got something like that it helps. If not learn something you always wanted to learn. I find the self improvement building blocks fun to build upon

That’s great advice. I’ve been learning the guitar actually. I’m a huge Rolling Stones fan so my goal is to be able to play ‘no expectations’. It’s something I can just focus on and learn from mistakes. A lot like sobriety. You can see progress each time you pick the strings. I also started working out and cleaning and detailing people’s cars and trucks for money. It’s rewarding. It’s only been and a couple weeks. However it’s happiest I’ve been since I was a teenager. Do you find you have to separate yourself from certain people?

I didn’t do anything but work for a month. I’m a golf pro so members and co-workers are constantly drinking. At some point everyday. I’d just refuse my drunk, was open about why and eventually they all caught on. But I missed some of the important occasions that happen in people’s lives because they worried me. I wouldn’t say separate applies, but if they were v trying to derail my efforts yes. Separate. What has really made an impact on me are the people who have found out about my choice and shared their stories with me. I mean members. The people that employ me are giving me their phone numbers and offering help. So whomever I lost as a social circle, were people I didn’t mind losing. And I gained folks that have a far more positive impact on my life that I never would have expected.

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@Bjs3135 welcome. We’re glad to have you.
I started drinking and using at 15. It started out because of the people I was hanging around, to fit in, to not be socially akward (I’m shy, and it made me outgoing) It then progressed to drinking/using out of boredom, because it was a good day, because it was a bad day, because I wanted to numb my feeling. It then progressed to completely trying to block the depression and anxiety, and to not deal with things. Further down…I no longer had a choice because the mental and physical obsession took over. I felt different, I felt alone, I didn’t like myself, I wanted to die. I got sober for 6 years then relapsed for another 6 years. I took it straight down further than I ever had before and my soul felt like it was dying. I kept moving the boundaries and crossing them until I though I was hopeless. I finally decided to go back to AA (for accountability, fellowship, and put the effort into more than just abstaining) I have been clean and sober for 86 days and have never felt better. I went from a selfish, lazy, pessimistic addict to a hard-working, happy, and positive member of society. I don’t numb…I walk through and process my thoughts and feelings. I help others. I treat myself with respect. I say No to things that are no longer serving my overall well-being and Yes to improvement. Miracles have happened, life situations have happened…and I am sober because of my God. Today I’m filled with gratitude and years of experiences. You haven’t ruined your life. I am 38 and just got my life back. Peace and Love on your journey.

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I started at 14, my mom was a single parent of 5 boys. I experimented with drugs, but I was always very leery of the white stuff. I lived in a very poor neighbourhood, and I saw drug dealers, crackheads and heroine on a daily basis. Even was offered the free sample on a daily basis. Many of my friends fell into that trap, and suffered many unrecoverable consequences OD, prison, bad drug deals, etc. In my infinite wisdom, I was like how bad can alcohol be? I convinced my mom to buy me alcohol on a weekly basis. I used the rationale, “Hey, mom you can buy it for me or I’ll get a whino to buy it.” It worked. When I turned 16, I got a fake college ID saying I was 21. I was a very smart and creative teenager. Well, this escalated to clubbing/bars Thursday-Saturday. I dropped out of high school end of my sophomore year in HS. Worked for a year doing production work. I hated it, I felt I was to smart for that. Went back the following year, and found out I was a Senior. In Middle school I was taking all AP HS classes, and had all the credits to graduate in time. Minus the AP Calculis, AP Chemistry I should of had to get into a good college. I was just to ignorant to realize the blessings I had. Any case, I went clean for the next 14 yrs.

You can recover! It’s only a matter of creating goals, and following through with them. You got this!

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Hi @Bjs3135 and welcome to the forum. thank you for sharing your story.

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Hi @Bjs3135 I started drinking and using drugs at 15, I now have 72 days clean and am very proud and grateful to b able to say that. Definitely get a good support system and if ur open to meetings they have really helped me. Just keep moving forward and b honest with yourself and others. That was a big part for me, being honest with myself and sort of telling on myself to others when I was starting to go in the wrong direction. Glad u r here and thanks for sharing!

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72 days is awesome!!! You should be so proud. Thank you for sharing your story:)

@Shattered_dreams thank you for sharing your story. It’s very similar to mine. You seem like a very smart intelligent person! Thank you for the modivation.

@Melrm wow 86 days. I bet you thought you could never do that. You’re an inspiration!! Thank you for sharing your story it’s extremely Interesting. Keep up the good work!!

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Hi bradley :slight_smile: i started using and drinking at 15 as well! i got sober at 21 and am 22 now. i have 73 days of sobriety and i couldn’t be happier with my life. i didn’t realize it at the time but a lot of my escape drinking was to get away from family problems as well and friends definitely instigated it for me too. i never drank like a “normie” up all night till the sun came drinking and eventually drugs got thrown into that mix like with most other alcoholics/addicts. glad you’re here and glad you opened up. first two weeks for me were brutal but it gets SO much better and not to mention easier, keep it up. here for ya​:heart:

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Hi @Bjs3135
I started drinking when I was 14. My dad was an alcoholic, who used to drink every day, come home and beat the life out of my mum more than once a week. He would also beat up me and my older brother when drunk or even hungover. I was around this all of the time so knew no different.
I started suffering from depression at 14 (surprise) as a result of my lovely home life and turned to drinking cider with my friends. This became an easy way to escape my crazy childhood so began my journey.
I left home at 17 and started quite a nice life with my boyfriend. We bought our first home, got engaged, martial and had children together. However, issues with my family were still there (although not violent to me anymore, dad was still beating up mum), I went back to blocking out issues with drink.
My depressive episodes have gone up and down over the years with serious thoughts of suicide. I eventually went to the doctors and sought help. I ended up on antidepressants and have been on and off them for years now.
I have never been taught how to handle stressful situations and always turned to wine to help me.

It wasnt until i actually looked at myself and ealise how many years I have been doing this. I’m wasting away my life and do not want to end up dead. I’ve have a lot of counselling and life coaching but have gained most of my understanding about myself from books and studies (the chimp paradox is excellent ) as well as using this forum to listen to and share with others.

I’m not quite there and probably won’t be for a while but I’m actually making changes in my life and am starting my journey. I’m finding new ways to deal with stress and am learning every day.

By the way, I’ve cut the family out of my life for my own sanity. I just couldn’t keep going through their crap time after time. This was a huge desicion for me but the right one as I am now recovering (slowly).

Good luck to everyone x

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