Thank you! what’s up?
@Payton_Mcdonald totally agree! These devils will not defeat us if we stick together and share our personal battles. I am learning a lot here. There is Hell and I had experienced it but I tasted Heaven too and that brought me Hope
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Almost 48 hours for me now feels like a week tho time is not my friend food is tasting better and my poetry is flooding back any advice cuzz shit is get ing pretty loud in my head
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Hitting a meeting usually quietens down that voice in my head, if you can’t do that maybe have a listen to some NA speaker tapes. Do anything except picking up 
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I’m right with you man today is my first day after a binge Hang strong I feeling your pain
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Welcome, Day 1 is the best day because you are taking the steps to start your sober journey. You never have to go back to day 1 again. Reach out if you need to, we are ALL here to help. Read and post often. Someone is usually around 24hrs a day you are never alone. You CAN do this. I’m proof of it! My name is Jim and I have 65 days today. Again, welcome you’re in the right place. Best of luck on your journey.
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My little poem.
The brute force of words just steeps through my soul. If my bones could speak they would scream to stop the disease from forming. You know the knowledge you possess and you feel in your center where you are to be. There is no second guessing. Trust yourself. We are apart of you and we communicate to you. Don’t doubt the messages you are getting. Doubt the messenger that’s trying to override the messages being felt in your core. You are not insane. You are just inspired to create and recover.
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Lost my job today about to give up and do the
Thing I’ve known at least I know that life and it makes sense give respect you get it and there at least my blood and sweat got me places manager by the time I’m 50 I made what managers made when I was 16 like how y’all do it get high make money and don’t. Die that’s it am a cannon fr anit much else you can do with a cannon ball
Things are going to go wrong in life mate but they are not all excuse to use over. Stay clean and get up early tomorrow and go looking for a new job
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Had that job 7 years…
Is using going to get it you back? No but it will make going out and getting another harder especially if they drug screen you like so many of them do nowadays
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4 hours from 4 days I feel kind dumb saying that my bra says the little wins matter too only am having a an anxiety problem
cars driving past slow it’s like I started sweat my heart starts to pound and the brain screaming duck run or fight and if the car stops the adrenaline hits 2 and shit leaves me stressed at a hour what should do or anyone else get anything like that?
Thank you so much Jim my name is also Jim lol I feeling so much better even after just now three days of not drinking your words have made my day I was feeling a little down cause I’m also going through a recent break up and was struggling a bit today but I just checked in and read your post and made me feel a lot better thank you very much for your words congratulations on 65 days 
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Watch the very good friend died and I it’s only number 14 I’ve been to one wedding how is it supposed to be okay and you know tomorrow that lose your best friend either way how you supposed to wake up and pretend like he is still there are you supposed to wake up and pretend that you don’t f****** care
No you can’t pretend they are still here but you can honour them by staying clean and by not going the same way. The only way to change societies view of addicts is to recover and fight
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I just feel like theres no way out and if theres a way out something will drag me back to where I “belong” on one way or another…
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Not going to lie I f***** up and lost the play but how am I going to complain with my brother today lost his life and his only way how am I supposed to be okay when I know tomorrow I’m going to have to tell his kid to his face there’s no way you’ll ever see is Daddy again but at least he died calling me his friend and if the narcan had worked I bet we’d still be shaking hands but now you’re shaking hands with the Devil the only thing we ever knew sorry little brother just know that I love you
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Yes and that’s the saddest part of all this shit. People are dying and leaving their loved ones behind because of this. But you know what? We can’t give it up for our loved ones… I also had a cousin who died from an OD from heroin. I’ve already read from your older posts that you’re also having a kid, I’m not having kids but I’ll be a stepmom to a 10 year old girl and I also wanna give her the good example and not being a druggy stepmom to her. It’s just painful for everybody to watch how people are suffering from this disease. And we gotta be able to learn and put ourselves and our people first instead of the dope
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And if I look at his son and tell him he’ll be okay or not I’ll be lying either way if I could save them all I would but I know I can’t but I can’t remember a time when my friends weren’t dying I don’t remember a time when me and my friends weren’t supply but I guess I’m at 14 now and my kids only one I’ve been to one wedding but I’m guessing I’m not the only one the evils that we do in the street are the demons in the monsters that haunt us in our sleep and if I go put a bullet straight through the cranium I would I couldn’t do that to the ones I loved so I guess when push comes to shove it’s going to be another one who takes my life and not me sorry little brother you never made it to be a …og and you never got to see your kids graduation but the fact that he was a nominated for his acts of kindness and I pray to God and I swear to you as long as I live your kid would never know the violence rip see you again lil brother
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They keep telling me to be the best example that I am but I feel like that line is kind of a scam considering that they don’t even understand half of the monster that I am that I lost 13 friends plus one tonight in these streets I don’t even bother going to the funerals anymore cuz they just hurt me and I wish I could forget yesterday cuz then I know tomorrow would be okay but I’m stuck here talking to my kid and my homies kid 2 talking about how good he was and I wish that you could meet him too but there ain’t nothing less I can say I can write a thousand words onto this page I can take a razor blade and make it go away for just a couple of hours but I don’t want the pain to go away cuz I know if it does stand so does the memory of him and I o he kin he saved me and I distance myself from him and now I’ll never get to see him again
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