I’ve been dealing with alcohol all my life. My moms an alcoholic as well as my dad and every time I’m in their house; all I want to do is drink. When I’m at home I drink by myself whilst playing video games. When I cant sleep; I drink. When I get home from work; I drink. When I cant deal with the struggles I have around myself; I drink.
I need a helping, guiding hand to get past this circle of self destruction. If anyone can give me some advice aside from AA meetings or finding jesus I would appreciate it.
You’re absolutely right. I do need some restructuring. I honestly just dont know how to go about it because I’ve always been codependent. I’ve had a lot of trauma throughout my childhood and teenage years and I’ve been through the therapeutic portion of it all. But every day is still an uphill battle
Easy, just stop drinking. Ha kidding aside, I’m only 4 days in but I have a super addictive personality, I’m currently trying my hardest to not drink and not use so I’ve decided to sign up for a 5k. I’m using my crazy addictive nature to train for this thing. I have friends that do the Spartan races while they’re recovering and are doing great staying focused on that. Best of luck!
I used to sit on my xbox all day and drink and smoke weed, I’ve since figured out that what I was actually doing was finding something to do while I drank all day bc now I don’t drink I also don’t enjoy gaming, most things you do now you will associate with drinking so like it has been said before find new interests no matter how simple that have no mental or emotional ties to drinking. Yes at first you will find this boring bc you will be looking for external happiness but nothing in this world keeps us happy for long so God or no God learn to be content with you, spend some time with sober you and your sober thoughts, listen to what they tell you and see if you agree with them, I can assure you that you won’t, so don’t react to them, do what you know to be true not some random nonsense about this is better with a drink, I’m only happy when drinking, I’m bored, angry I’ll drink. Quote “Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change”
Avoiding that first drink sounds easy enough…
I’ll continue to push through. I’m 3 days sober which is honestly a miracle for me. I’ve got an amazing daughter and a woman I wish I could never lose but if I continue down the road I’m heading I’m afraid I’ll lose them both which you think would be motivation enough but it never seems to be after I’ve had a few drinks.
I’m happy I signed up on here though because the motivation from complete strangers is almost staggering. Thank you guys so much for the motivation. I’ve got this. I can quit
As most other people have said, and what was one of the things that stood out to me, was that getting sober is life changing!
This is not just stopping drinking and then bam your life changing.
It is down to us to make the changes. It’s hard, there is no easy way, personally, I don’t like the way you are already discounting things. This means that your mind is already closed to avenues that are there and can help you, if you want them to.
It’s starts with us saying no to the first drink.
And sticking to it, no matter what.
And please keep an open mind, you never know if something is going to work until you give it a try.
Back in my early days I’d have stood on my head in a bucket of shit if it was what was needed.
Believe me when I say I am open minded. I need the reassurance that I can quit. I need the reactions from recovering addicts. I need all the help i can get. But with the reactions within an hour that i have received and all the motivation from reading other addicts stories and recoveries I have to believe that I can push through. I’m not dismissing the fact that it will be difficult. I’m simply embracing the fact that others have done it so why cant I? Like I said; I’ve got this. I can quit. I just hope the motivation doesnt stop. I appreciate everyone that has given me advice. Including you, Geo.
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I need the reassurance that I can quit.
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Oh, you can do it.
Anyone can do it. I spent two years after I finally admitted that I am an alcoholic believing that I couldn’t. Trying my hardest but I wasn’t ready.
Then I found this app and like you read other people’s stories and found I could relate to so many of them.
It gave me the motivation I needed, so well done for reaching out.
I’m over a year sober now but I know that if anyone had said to me where I would be today, 3 years ago. I would not have believed it possible.
But anything is possible bud
Thank you for the positivity. I’ve been dealing with alcohol since I was 14 years old and it’s been a revolving door of blackouts since I was basically a kid. My parents are both heavy drinkers ever since the loss of my brother and I grew up convinced that alcohol was the only way to cure emotional pain. I drank to escape everything. Every small emotional problem that I had. I drank. Its just nice to know I’m not the only one out there that dealt with it the same way. It’s nice to know I’m not alone.
Check in daily, read, write, be a part of cummunity. I’m also no AA/God person only this forum (and therapist who guided me a bit) allowed me to stop drinking. 79 days sober today nad never felt better
Thank you
I really appreciate it
I’m at my parents tonight and theres a bar filled with booze but I’m doing my best to fight the temptation to mix myself a drink. This is one place I need to avoid in my future recovery. It’s so hard not to drink when I’m here because it’s so readily available. You guys have honestly given me the strength to just avoid it.
Thank you all so much.
welcome here johnny, You show desire to change your life for the better! I see you already god some sound advice on here. Myself I am also back at first days of recovery.
Do not pick up the first one. look at your patterns and activity that help induce in drinking and step bij step change the patterns.
It is so simple, but definitely not easy.
Hang in there!
3 days is big! Your doing something different, maybe just havent figured it out yet but your doing it or thinking about it differently. I struggle every day as most. Changing things up, like others menti8ned helped. One person wrote using addictive personality to focus on running. That was what I started doing, refocus that piece of you to other tasks. I too started running, got into marathons and Tough Mudders but needed more. Started focusing on life stuff. Neglected projects, around the house, work, went to training programs for job. If you think about it differently, an addict had an extreme ability to focus. Unfortunately the focus is on unhealthy stuff but shift that energy to positive stuff and you will change. Keep honest and open communication with your partner. I had / have moments where emotions explode. Anger, sadness, depression. It impacts those we care about. I turned some focus on talking about the “moments” and really trying to feel it coming on. This is my approach, everyone finds there way who wants to. 3 days shows you want it. Stay with it. Its rough, really rough at times and others rewarding. Peace can be such a new wonderful feeling. Wish you an enlightening journey. By the way, I’m not an huge AA guy or finding God type of person, nothing against it and both are a philosophy that works for some. Wasn’t my thing either. You will find yours if you are open to new experiences and ways of thinking.
Sounds like you’re already getting a lot from the support here, and that’s so awesome. I love this place and the support I get. I can relate to the trauma and early start drinking age. It becomes habit, so I’m learning to replace the “bad” habits with good ones. One thing that has helped me so much is the gym. I feel so great after and get hyper focused on keeping up that great feeling. There are so many times where weakness will try to creep in, but I come here and work my way through it with the support of these incredible folks. Sounds like you’re ready to do the work. Looking forward to seeing your journey.
You’re definitely not alone brother.
Get on here anytime you need to talk. It’s 24/7 on here.
Read as much as you can old topics, new topics, ask questions.
I found that the more I learnt the stronger I felt to fight.
And I did have to fight. Arguing with myself, trying to stop myself from drinking. Stopping myself from driving to the shop and buying something.
Had to fight to change the old routines and start new ones.
It gets easier, my life is normal now, on the whole.
I wake up and say to myself “Im sober” as I have for the last year.
I use the serenity prayer if I find challenges in my way. (Look it up)
I’m happier because I’m facing life head on, and not running and hiding in a bottle anymore.
And if people don’t like that of me, well I ain’t got time for them.
I am in the same situation. Even drinking while playing video games. I have found mindfulness to be a huge help. Also, counseling as well. There is a therapy called EMDR that focuses on breaking patterns that lead to unhealthy habits and the emotions/urges that drive those habits. It’s tough but has allowed me to start to find who I am and grow in that space.
I’m not sure why you request no AA since it’s free and everywhere. If it’s God you’re concerned about, AA is as religious as YOU want it to be. But that’s up to you, of course, I just strongly recommend a fellowship recovery program of some sort. Several have been listed here. Being and sharing with people who are going through the same thing…or have been through the same thing and come out the other side… is a MAJOR help in recovery. We need other people who understand because the normes in our lives never will…they can be supportive but they’ll never understand.
It can be hard or it can be easier than you might think right now. Don’t be afraid to keep going just because you already think it’s going to be too hard. Eventually it gets easier as you progress in sobriety and take the challenges as they come one by one. Don’t focus on how impossible it sounds right now to tackle one month or one year, because it will get overwhelming pretty quickly and let you down before you even begin. Focus on small goals and tackle them one by one.
This place has amazing people who will support you so just keep checking in and stay focused. All the best to you and your family
I’m also no AA/God person 
only this forum (and therapist who guided me a bit) allowed me to stop drinking. 79 days sober today nad never felt better 
