Alcoholic insanity?

I have just started engaging in this forum, and I am excited to both receive and give encouragement!
I have struggled with alcoholism mainly since my 20’s and even been diagnosed with several mental illnesses. I believe it is all due to alcohol. Alcohol has also been my gateway drug in addition to making me completely psychotic. Has anyone else experienced that?
When I was sober for almost two years I was the most stable I have ever been, but I unfortunately relapsed after having a baby in November. I now have 90 days and am rebuilding my life from scratch. I lost, or “gave away” everything I had. Even my children briefly.
I am so encouraged by attending aa meetings when I can and have an amazing sponsor.
My main interest is to see if anyone else has also experienced insanity due to alcohol before.
Thank you for reading and good luck on all your journeys!

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Welcome @Lfgjfd! Congrats on 90 days, and thanks for your first post on the other thread. Solid stuff and you remind me I need a sit down with my own sponsor. :rofl:

I’ve struggled with anxiety/depression on and off my whole life. Full-on alcoholic insanity, well… I’m sure I could conjure some particularly insane evenings.

My experience is like yours though. After several months sober for the first time in a real long time I’m amazed how much more level I feel now. How vastly more approachable and balanced life feels today sober and with help from AA and the fine folks I’ve met here.

There is zero doubt in my mind that alcohol put fuel on the chaos physically, mentally and emotionally.

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Hi @Lfgjfd yes I can totally relate to your post…I too suffered mental health issues…so drank more in an attempt to get happier or forget my unhappiness… when I cut out alcohol and continue to maintain this (coming up to a year and half) I have never been happier! No booze equals better quality of life :grin:

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Well I know for two years I was really stable while I was sober. I’m hoping and praying it was all the alcohol .
The steps really help me too. And just reaching out to my sponsor daily and being healthy overall.
I think I am very sensitive to any chemicals or substances, including nicotine and even caffeine.
I now avoid all medications and substances, but I do still smoke cigars and occassionally drink coffee. I find that if I am drinking lots of water, exercising and eating tons of vegetables I feel my best.
I even noticed when I dont smoke I feel 10 times better. Smoking makes me irritable and slightly depressed. That’s just me.
A researcher of addictions named dr. Inaba says it takes two full years for our brains to repair from addiction damage. The trick is to learn to cope with our emotions without alcohol or other drugs, so we may feel worse just from learning how to do that.
Thank you for all of your responses. It helps.

2 years eh (Canadian here)? Is that why after 82 days I feel amazing some days and then really exhausted and foggy others? I haven’t felt right the last week or so and I can feel my anxiety creeping up. Doing all the right stuff: eating right, avoiding sugar, drinking lots of water, exercising and fresh air…but feel like garbage mentally and in my guts too… I hope it passes.

I haven’t started working my steps yet but at a meeting today they talked about step 5 and I am wondering if I am not feeling good because I am carrying toxic memories and thoughts of my not so far away past.

Sorry just rambling now…here’s to being sober through all of it!