My office makes jokes all the time about things that are somewhat offensive. Now ivebeen working here for almost 3 years. And I’m tired of the alcoholic, addict and crazy people jokes. Its offensive I’m the only person in the office who is bi polar. But they talk shit all the time calling people crazy and bipolar when ever someone gets mad or reacts in an angry way. Or when someone drinks every other weekend they make jokes about them being alcoholics knowing I am. Maybe I’m Just feeling sensitive today.
How do you know that you are the only person in the office who has been diagnosed bi-polar or the only person who is alcoholic? Are the comments directed at you like if for instance Bob is joking about Joe’s hangover and says, “be careful, you don’t want to end up like her. She’s a crazy drunk…”?
If the comments are directed at you, don’t put up with it. If it’s more people demonstrating boorish behavior in a professional environment, I’d recommend just taking a breath, letting it go, and focus on being the best damned whateveryoudo in the office.
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Going strictly based on what you’ve outlined here it sounds like a pretty toxic environment? Is it always like this or are there periods where it seems more redeemable? Do you enjoy the work and the actual people (crude behavior and choice of antics aside)?
Personally, I have a very low tolerance for anything that is sub-par when it comes to professionalism. I used to work at a small firm of architects and, without a formal HR department, they got away with saying and doing all kinds of crazy shit. And that’s in a fairly liberal, politically correct, area. I found that the expectation that I “not be so sensitive” to be demoralizing. So I left.
We spend a majority of our awake-hours at work, if you work full time. If it’s not benefiting you in a way that is healthy and rewarding, I’d evaluate options, but that’s just me.
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I also want to say, that sometimes it can pay dividends to “be the agent of change” in an environment. You do this by exercising 2 steps. 1) you do not play into the antics and 2) you pro-actively seek opportunities to do something that is positive and uplifting. I’ve noticed that people can “get in the rut” of going along with the crowd. But when you create such a stark contrast it’s obvious to people what is right and what is wrong and doing small acts of kindness can go a long way and help make the work day much more tolerable. It also calls out the assholes who are there just to stir shit up and makes them look shamelessly immature and pathetic. So it’s a win-win-win ;).
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There’s only so many groups left that people are allowed to ostracize, let them have their fun!
I’m kidding of course… It’ll take a sea change socially for this to be resolved, but yes, mental illness and obesity and addiction still seem to be fair game for people who like to feel better by trampling others. If it bothers you, speak up I say, they’ll shut up
Document the conversations and then report that shit to HR. The only way to stop behavior like this in the workplace is to call those people out. It’s unacceptable etiquette in general, but most certainly is against office policies. I disagree with other people here who have said just shrug it off… not standing up to behavior like this is why that same behavior still exists. It’s wrong.
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Excellent suggestions
I know because it’s a small office and I ended up dating the only other alcoholic in the office whom I later found out was also bi polar(not smart I know). He no longer works there and people made a ton of jokes about how we suited each other and so forth since we were both a bit crazy with similar senses of humor. There are no secrets in my office, rumors yes but no secrets.
Hilariously, or maybe not so much it is a small office in which when I brought it up to my manager and asked her to cut back on the bipolar jokes she said it was aimed at me. And since I was feeling sensitive she understands.
In that case…you have a case. I amend my recommendation. You are most definitely not overreacting. No one should have to put up with that Highschool mickeymouse crap.
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I’ve been doing that for at least a month and documented a few other incidents that included the CEO saying “everyone’s depressed” when my manager was trying to explain why i took days I had saved up off.
I think it would be important to be insulted if it was specifically because of you or it’s being directed at you. Otherwise that’s mainly just people. Callous and crass people by the very definitions of the words. Unless you could actually make it better by saying something it could be so much freaking worse. I know they’d be just as put off as anyone if they actually knew they were around a person with one of those illnesses but try to think at least they’re being open about it in a way. This is 2018 not 3018.