Hello community. I used go come on here quite a bit and it was very helpful. I got very busy and decided to delete the app. Thought i wouldnt need it anymore since i was doing so well. I was doing great for a while too, unfortunately I have not been making the best decisions in life. Blame it on stress, depression, anger, genetics or simply bad decision making, but whatever the reason is I cant put down the bottle for good. i dont care what the reason is anymore. Im sure there are countless reasons. I just want to improve my life. Start over. Clean slate. Feel good about myself again. I have been sober for 4 days and hopefully with this community i can stay sober.
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Been there! Glad you are back!
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Try āI canāt say noā
That my friend is the only reason!
There is a thread called List of Excuses.
Have a look, I think all of them are on there.
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Yes that was my point. There is so many things I can āblameā it on. But at the end of the day its all on my choice.
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Great perspective and one that I think will help keep you grounded and sober this time. Congrats on Day 4!! Keep at it 
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Welcome back @Ren, doing this alone is nearly impossible. Iāve got over 700 days sober and I am still on here everyday. Keep reading and posting. Its helps all of us.
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Thank you!!
Thank you and I will !
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Welcome back @Ren!
I can relate to the feeling that Iām strong enough to stay sober without additional help. But after so many failures, Iāve come to the conclusion that Iām pretty weak. Iām not as strong as Iād like to be. I really need help. And Iāve come to accept that Iām always going to need help.
Thanks for sharing.
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I am back too 
The blame game is never fun. I used a trip to Vegas as an excuse to drink again, and I am miserable. I lost 9 months of sobriety, and it wasnāt worth it. Not at allā¦ Letās support each other on getting healthier in our bodies, minds, and spirits.
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Glad you are back. Keep pushing forward!
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You tried to do this alone. That wonāt workā¦
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You didnāt lose your 9 months. Hopefully you learned from them and from your relapse and grew some sober muscles. Now you can make your foundation even stronger with what you learned.
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Needing help is not weak, itās human. Knowing we need help and asking for it makes us strong!
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Thanks @SassyRocks. I know what I have to do. Already back in gym and eating better. I do get stronger each time I fall. Love the muscle metaphor!
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My last relapse was 11 months long. I used my Motherās death as an excuse.
Welcome back. I remember you. You used to post pics holding your days. Looking forward to seeing those again.
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This is just one a$$hatās opinionā¦
Addictive, self-destructive behavior is a symptom of a larger issue. I think you believe the same thing when you say, āstress, depression, anger, geneticsā¦ā
Iād bet my last buck your childhood was a traumatic oneā¦
Iād bet you were and are an lonerā¦
Iād bet your turns to the bottle are a vain attempt to stave off the pain, anger, sadness, self-loathingā¦
The list is endless.
If I am right, let me know.
And, even if Iām not, try to internalize the following:
Bad things may have befallen you.
Bad things may have been done BY you.
You are the only one like you in the Universe. There has never been one like you, nor will another like you come again.
Regardless of what you believe in your heart of hearts, you have worth. I know this because your action here prompted my response. This interaction has helped me. You have done this for me. And I thank you for it.
We are ALL in this together, Ren.
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Thanks @Yoda-Stevie. Almost at double digits now (days) sobriety. You are a Rockstar, and an inspiration to many on here, including myself. Iāll be holding my signs up again very soonš
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Glad youāre back! I threw 8 months away too, so Iām new again also. Donāt look back, just forward. 
Well me eirther still new just 46day.still ups and downs.we learn from mistake .there not such things we can do it again.
Letās rock all together againā¦