Lost my 3rd job in a year due to no call no show because I relapsed on alcohol. I’m so sick and tired of myself I don’t know what to do. Any advice??
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What have you done to not drink?
This is literally what brought me to the reality of the state I was in. Sick and tired of letting myself down since I had let everyone else down.
I try not to give advice because I’m generally not very good at that but I will gladly give a suggestion or two.
- I’d suggest talking to a recovering alcoholic, your doctor or even a counselor. Each one will have a slightly different approach but their words might ring a bell or two within you.
- Perhaps try a new hobby to keep your head busy, away from the thoughts of alcohol.
- Look to make new friends. People who don’t constantly look to alcohol to relax, have fun and bring positive thoughts your way.
Sobriety is difficult. The most difficult part is creating new habits. The best part for me is my sleep has entered a phase of consistency. That is a reward for me and I’m so happy to know that I earned that reward with hard work and calling my sponsor regularly, pretty much daily to help maintain focus.
I hope this helps! Keep coming back and joining in on these threads. We love to see newbies become regulars
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Welcome. Stick around …it gets better.
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I was 90 days strong, just the regular. Going to work, doing things around the house. Then I foolishly decided to have a drink one Saturday and that lead to a week of binging.
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Yes, I have some ppl from the program that I need to start being more in contact with, and also family and friends. I’m just tired of this reoccurring cycle. As soon as things start to look up, my mind starts playing tricks on me and tells me I can just have one drink, and then all hell breaks loose.
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Honestly, the best advice I can give is to recognize and accept that for you there can’t be any splurging or attempts at moderation. The video in the link above talks about how the brain is rewired due to drug/alcohol abuse and that once that line is crossed the only thing that will work long term is abstinence. It’s an hour long video, but you can easily listen to it while being domestic around the house, playing video games, or whatever. This video was useful for me; maybe it will be for you too. Good luck, and also welcome.
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I used to go thru the same exact thing until I joined AA. You can’t do it alone , because one of the main things about staying sober is stepping out of our selfish me me me way of thinking that eventually leads to self loathing or anger when things don’t go our way which then leads to more drinking and lead us into a frame of mind in which we think more about those around us , especially our loved ones. Thru AA I was able to find a new purpose and by reading the big book I gained new knowledge on what I’m dealing with in how to fight it. Your fighting a war, no soldier can figt a war on his own . Try to get involved with AA and others that can understand…before that I used to call of work still drunk from the night before …now I’m 7 months and 20 something days clean with lil to no urge.
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I’m glad you know people in the program, reaching out to someone for support can help with the thought of a first drink.
Come here and talk to us too…
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Hi. Firstly you have 90 days behind you. That is an achievement. Many here fully support AA as really helpful. However there are so many ways to not using alcohol. Personally I detest the term ‘alcoholic’. It has such a stigma attached to it, but I know that many who are trying to keep sober feel that it has utility. And if that frame of reference works for you then that’s fine. It’s about whatever works for you.
I used audio books to keep reminding me of how powerful alcohol is. Think about what the trigger was. How could you avoid it? For me eating, to the point of feeling full takes away any cravings.
Also going to bed as soon as you get home from work or at any point you hear the “come on, you can have a drink, you’ve earned it” helps me. Bed is not somewhere I associate with alcohol.
Obviously that won’t help if you have children! But as an ‘empty nester’ I’ve found being in bed a real self soother.
I really recommend looking at tiredofthinkingaboutdrinking on the Internet. She has lots of tips and support for over drinkers ‘her phrase’. Also the Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray is a tremendous audio book.
And here of course! Stay here!
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Have you considered rehab it’s not for everyone but I maybe a great place to start figuring what your next move is.
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Thank you very much.
Great advice, I’ll look into that book. Thank you!
Well, I’ve been to a detox center before, and that was expensive enough lol. I think I’m just going to stick to AA and my support system around me.
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Hey there. I’m sorry to hear that you’re struggling. It sounds like you have a support system in AA though. Did you hear about that guy who heard on the weather about the big storm coming but thought “oh it’ll pass I’ll be fine, God will save me” so he kept going about his day? Then the storm was close and the police came to evacuate him and he waved them by saying “no thanks I can do this on my own I pray and it’ll be fine”. Then the storm came and water started to fill the house and he ended up on the roof and the helicopter came to rescue him but he wanted to jump to the ladder himself…and he fell into the water and got swept away? When he met god he said “what happened?! I prayed I asked you to get me through this…you never came” and god said “what do you mean?! I came in the weather report…I came through the police, I came in a hand wanting to help pull you to the ladder”
Sometimes it’s letting go of the thought that we have to do things on our own that opens the door to recovery💛
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Love this Ely so very very true and very touching.xx
I love that story…that’s a great example.
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