Visiting my mom and dad Sunday, we were discussing my dad’s knee replacement surgery (it was this afternoon and he came through it fine). When I got up to go to the bathroom, on the countertop next to the sink was a prescription for 10mg percocet. As most of you know, pain pills is my DOC, but finding them this time was different. This time, I had no opioid antagonist in my system, so there was nothing to stop me from that wonderful euphoric feeling that led me down the path to almost complete destruction. What I did have was 469 days clean. I had the memories of my attempted suicide, the withdrawals, the struggle to keep clean at the beginning of my sobriety when I left the residential treatment center and sober living environment. I also had my consequences card that I looked at to remind myself what would happen if I used, even once, again. I reached out to someone and let them know what had just happened so I followed my own advice of NEVER CRAVE ALONE.
Today, I’m 471 days clean. I’m not a superhero and I’m not a perfect man. What I am is a recovering drug addict that has the willpower to say no. I know that one is too many and a thousand is never enough. What I am is living proof that we do recovery, and if you want sobriety bad enough, you can have it too. It’s not easy, but it’s not always difficult. It starts by telling yourself not one drink, not one pill, not one joint, not one anything. NEVER CRAVE ALONE
Ya know G, if we don’t share the experiences, the joyous part of recovery and the bad sometimes horrific parts of our journey, we will never be complete. If our stories can help one person break the chains of addiction, then to me, all of the pain, suffering, joy and triumphs I, and many others have conquered are worth it. That being said, if there were a magic pill, potion or spell that would make our addictions never have happened I’m sure would surely take it, but since there isn’t, we settle for sharing recovery to the addicts still suffering.
For me, short, sweet and to the point. Bullet points are something I learned to embrace during my time in the service, it seemed perfect clear how to make it.
I see it as my duty to pass it on, I’m only part way through my steps so not really there yet but it has been gracefully passed on to me so I owe it to the ones before me to pay it forward. If what any of us have been through can help just one person then it has all been worth it in my eyes.
Lol that’s pretty much what you said.
Yeah I’d pass on all the horrible parts the one thing I am glad of though is the necessity and the chance to take a long hard look at myself and learn to change for the better, not many people do that in their lifetime
I think that it’s one of the best threads I’ve seen on here
Eureka… paying it forward was the phrase I was trying to recall, but couldn’t pull it off of the end of my tongue. It is truly humbling having my experiences touch the lives of others. The military is really good at training it’s members to communicate effectively and I soaked it up like a new sponge getting its first drink of water.
I have something similar in my wallet at all times.
First one: illusion, painfull decay and death, isolation, mental and physical problems, lies, (lung) cancer, losing muscle (20kg+) (I once lost 20kg because I rarely ate and slept because of addiction), a few organs shutting down, Weakness, psychosis.
Second one: Love, real feelings, friends, mental and physical strength, goals and dreams, creativity: writing and painting, truth, honesty, dignity, humanity, family, health, spirituality, money, exercise, time, a real selfconsciousness, productivity.
Thanks for taking the time to write that.
This is why we do this. So we can look ourselves in the eye again and not cringe, but instead know we met the challenges.
This just made me very emotional, in a good way. Your communication is solid my friend! I’m very glad you are on this side with us, fighting the good fight and helping others!
