My wife and I had the benefit of an early diagnosis but also the studies that started 25 + years ago. I ve spoken to many parents who’s children are your daughters age and almost all have said back then there were no interventions or services and forget about mainstream school for some. Our boy recieved services as soon as we recieved the diagnosis and although daily challenges still arose, they were handle better by him but more so by us. Having people in our corner was a great help. Here too. None of us individually have the answers but collectively there is a wealth of information at our disposal. Thank you @Zoesgram.
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It is a hard pill to swallow in the beginning. I never thought my daughter would be out on her own. Never mind being a parent. She did quit college after 2 years. She just couldn’t quite fit in.
I live in Massachusetts. Not sure where your from but we have a great system. I take young adults out all day to various jobs exercise as well as teach life skills. It’s called many things. Agency 6 with choice, self direction etc. Maybe your state has something similar.
I have seen some these individuals progress quicker than any of us thought possible.
There is lots of help out there but it can be hard to find or just plain overwhelming.
Please let me know if i can help in any way.
It can be very lonely especially after they become adults.
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Thank you! I’m in NJ and it was tough finding the right info. I finally got connected with a state agency and after tons of paperwork, sample jobs, dr visits and 2 years of interviews they are finally getting us the help we desperately need. It was much easier during the younger years where everything was readily available through school. We were left on our own when school ended. I wish they had a better system to transfer into adult life.
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My son is 5 and he has autism and ADHD. It can be very stressful at times so i understand how you feel. I also love to connect with other (sober) moms who are going through similar situations as us it’s just always nice to have someone to talk too who can relate.
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@funnydad I’m so happy that your family was able to get help when your son when he was young.
We brought our daughter to so many doctors and therapist and still did not get an answer until I figured it out.
No early intervention or any kind of services for aspergers when she was younger.
Dr.s and people were not as educated as they are now.
Thank goodness for the Internet.
I’m am so grateful for everyone here.
I never would have dreamed a sober app would help in all aspects of my life.
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I work for seven hills family support. I believe we are in RI too.
We offer transition assistance, free trainings and lots of other things. Maybe there is one near you. It has been a life saver for me as a mom looking for help.
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I’ll check onto it. Thanks again for all your advice.
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Thanks for this post. My little girl has special needs, I’m a single mum, with no contact from her dad, my own mum controls me and my entire family view my addiction problems as selfish, which they are. But doesn’t help when you’re feeling really low and struggling. Love this forum 
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Where in Jersey are u? I was born and raised in Point Pleasant on the shore.
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I have 2 special needs kids. My daughter is 10 with ODD, ADHD, SPD and DDS. She is going at the end of the month to a year long residential treatment center for her behaviors. It is going to be hard but needs to be done so she can get the help she needs. My son is 17 with autism and asbergers and severe anger issues. @Allicat388 I give you an enormous amount of credit raising 3 boys with special needs and so young. It must be very hard being single and I pray for you. I wish you luck and anytime you need to talk or just vent let me know.
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I’m in Morris County (northwest).
Oh my goodness You have your hands full.
Being sober has helped with my patience.
I’m proud of everyone here for everything you do everyday.
If ever you need anything please just ask. It’s so awesome to have this support
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Beautiful area.
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I love the shore and wish we could move there but work prevents it. We had a house in LBI but had to sell due to finances just before the sandy storm which turned out to be the best timing. Now we come down by you for day trips, much closer. We love Jenkinsons, can’t stand seaside aka sleazeside. Lol
I, also, have 2 kids on the spectrum. I have a 13 year old son and an 11 year old daughter who are both high functioning autistic. After years of medicating and trying to “adult” but failing miserably I also found out that I’m high functioning autistic and just learned very early to mimic “normal” behavior. We live in a very poor county in Missouri that unfortunately is lacking to say the least in resources so I feel like I’m parenting by prayer. One book I highly recommend is called “look me in the eye” by John Elder Robinson, it really helped me understand the world through my kids eyes. Other than that as long as you parent from love then you’re doing it right🤗
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Hi, I have 2 children aged 6 and 10 both girls. My eldest has autism, didn’t speak until she was 4 and even now relies very much on echolalia. When she was younger she had horrible screaming fits and I remember a family member saying “what have you done to that poor child to make her like that!”. I enjoyed alcohol before that but it was around that time the day drinking started.
Have been on and off sober for a couple years and am now on day 19. It’s odd because I feel so much happier, positive and in control when sober and I can deal with any issues. Yet so many times I come to believe I am magically cured. So this time I am trying to add to discussions on here and be immersed rather than just reading other people’s.
I am.studing to be a level 3 preschool assistant (1 year of 2 complete) and I don’t see myself doing this if I cannot beat it once and for all.
Both of my parents were alcoholic and I don’t want that for my children. I tried to hide it as much as I could but that doesn’t solve the problem. So here goes.
Thanks guys.
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Amazing. Well done. I’m just behind you at 307 days 
Keep checking in and let us know how you’re doing 
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Good for you Klaire. It takes courage and conviction to do what you’re doing. Your children will see that and learn from it growing up. Kids on the spectrum are really “tuned in” to what’s going on around them and though they can’t express it with all the abstractions we all use they are some of the most honest, observant people I’ve met. (Before getting in to my current position I often tutored kids on the spectrum.)
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I am a parent of a child with special needs.
He is 8yr old and he was born with cerebral palsy.
I’m so proud of him, he’s overcome so many challenges in his life already and can’t wait to see him grow more and more
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Oh wow, how did I miss this thread?! I have a 16 year old daughter with special needs. She has a rare microdeletion on her 13th chromosome. And because of that she has an intellectual disability, is deaf in one ear and is non-verbal. She uses a combination of modalities to communicate: gestures and ASL signs, vocalizations, writing notes, and at school she uses an ipad with a chat app that she types into and it says what she types.
Emotionally she is at about the age of a 6-7 year old. Her palatte is also at the age of a 6-7 year old so there are a lot of foods she doesn’t like and I have to give her a lot of things like hamburgers, hot dogs, and lunchables. I have to help her with things like turning on the bath water, washing her hair and putting on some of her clothes. I think she’ll eventually live in a group home of some type when she is maybe in her mid-twenties. I am afraid of her being taken advantage of because of her disability. But that is future tripping and I try not to think those thoughts. She is super independent. She is on the honor roll at school in her special ed classes and in general ed P.E. and art. She can cook her own hotdog for lunch but can’t do something like mac 'n cheese. She is fun to be around so I am lucky.
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