At a very young age, I discovered porn, and boy did it ruin my life for a good amount of years! Started beating it for fun, then for stress relief, and then I couldn’t stop for soooo long.
4 months ago I met a girl, and I finally decided enough was enough and I became sober for 4 months - until last night. She broke up with me 1 month ago and I haven’t been the same since.
Though from doing research, porn addiction is actually a very large problem, but it’s (in my opinion) not recognised enough as a problem, as talking to people about it in the past back when I was a teenager people would only give me the usual “Oh it’s very normal for your age”. It wasn’t. Not this amount. They don’t know what it’s like. And I even thought “Oh, adults don’t watch porn, they’re mature.” Then I proved myself wrong by becoming an adult and still not stopping.
I think 4 months sober is a very good milestone, though it’s sad I’m back at day 1 again. Such a shame, I was already planning a small Corona-proof party for when I reached 6 months sobriety 
How did it affect my life? In my teenage years, it turned me into a huge pervert, and I feel really ashamed for that old me. I already attempted to stop during those years, but I couldn’t go on longer than max. 12 days, with the withdrawals devouring me alive at night. I eventually started seeking Christianity and it changed me in a positive way. Recently I have also started exercising and I’ve tried finding more people I can talk to about this, and that’s how I ended up here.
The withdrawal urges are the worst, though. You lie there, in bed, with insomnia, and your body is refusing to let you fall asleep until you do it again. And you can take thousands and thousands of measures against it, but it’ll find it’s way eventually.
My best measures:
- No phones in bed
- Sleeping early and waking up early
- Ice cold showers
- Now towels close to bed
- Exercising and working so hard that you don’t even think about it
The biggest mistake I’ve ever made was thinking I could be ease on the measures because I thought I’d be fully sober at 4 months. And that’s why I’m at day one now.
