Any younger people here?

Your Story
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I am 21 and have been drinking excessively every day for 5 years. Before that, I started drinking around 13.

My mum was with my dad for 10 years and they split up when I was around 7. My dad always says my mum would rarely even drink at Christmas. Five years went past, my mum had another child and after that, I remember seeing quite a lot of different men. I always for some reason could sense when one wasn’t right and there was this one man in particular I remember. Because she started drinking.

They split up when I was 12. it was quite messy. I remember her shyly telling me he’d thrown a picture frame across the room one day and I was shocked that she hadnt said anything before. Her mood was all over the place and she carried on drinking. I was worried about her andnl spoke to my dad. This is when he furtherer my conferns, stating she barely ever even drank at Christmas. When she was sad, she drank. When she was happy, she drank. And she became more “independent”. I thought she was okay again but I didnt like the way she was phsyically damaging her body. Thinking I didnt want to see my mom die through this.

Some more personal stuff happened to me and I was in a dark place, I started emptying half of her new bottles of vodka. Drinking it to make myself “feel okay” and thinking I’d halved her alcohol intake, thus not causing as much physical damage. To me it didnt matter, as she wasnt going to see it kill me. I was wrong.

My mother didnt notice id been topping her bottles up with alcohol suprisingly. Not in the taste. She was drinking it quicker, buying more bottles which meant there were more bottles for me to pour half out and drink.

She started seeing people again, and I had my friends round quite a lot as she was often on several dates a week. Night after night I would sit there with half a litre of straight vodka. My friends didnt even drink. But at that point it was taking my mind off everything else and I was enjoying myself.

When I was 14, I entered a relationship with someone I am still friends with now. Although I have pushed away at the moment due to my addiction. He was worried for me, and when I was 14 years old I was struggling to stop drinking. Struggling with withdrawals. I managed to stop for a while, but some more personal things happenened when i was 14. Due to again being in a dark place i dont remember i lot of it, i.e. How long i stopped for etc. I started drinking again. He cheated on me and when i went to see him, he had a bottle of JD. I drank it, forgave him and endured another 2 shitty years of drinking all the time, having arguments and breaking down.

I still functioned, managed to gain 3A*s and 9As at GCSE. Continued doing my ALevels, stuff happened at school and i quit half way through. I then spent all day every day drinking and working part time. I eventually got a full time job at the age of 18 and have been there 2 years plus now.

I have been in my current relationshio for 3 years now. And every day of those 3 years he has wanted me to stop. It got to the point where it was him and my life, or the drink. I am trying to choose my life.

… Anyway, apologies for the ramble. It was supposed to be a quick question but everything came out…

I have never met anyone who is in their early 20s and started drinking heavily in their early teens. Wondering if any of you guys have a similar experience youd like to share please?

Thanks for reading x

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Hi kimcee. I’m 17, but I am a gaming addict. I don’t have any similar experiences at all, but I do know what it’s like to be an addict. If you have any questions, feel free to ask

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I’m much older then you but I’m really impressed with how u want to change your life around I wish I did it at your age so I wouldn’t have put myself and family through years of hell. X

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I’m 28 and now been sober for a year and a half so far. My life experiences have been different from yours, though I’ve found since arriving at this forum that the addiction experiences are very similar across the board despite the diverse life experiences, so I’ve been able to learn a lot from everyone. Of course, I understand it is a little easier when our lives are more comparable sometimes but I thought I’d mention that.

My experience has been that all the stuff that’s going on in early adulthood — relationships, career/vocational options, life direction, trying to figure out how to be a “real adult”, figure out who I am, plan for the future, etc. — all of it can feel big, but all of it needs a clear sober head and not to be drowned out. I tried figuring out this stuff before putting down the drink and didn’t truly get anywhere, I only convinced myself I did. It can be hard to stay quit, but if you manage that then all this other stuff can start coming together, and naturally so. It’s not such an impossible unmanageable knife juggling act. My mental health has greatly improved, my ability to connect with others in healthy ways, I’m closer to getting the kind of work I want, I’m discovering a clearer image of who I am, and it’s because now I’m on a level playing surface, not in quicksand. Of course the life stuff is still hard, but it’s at least manageable now.

But this is a day-by-day process, and especially in the early days it’s important to take things as they come and not get overwhelmed with how things might be in the future. As you strengthen your ability to resist cravings and cope with feelings in healthier ways, with mindful self-honesty, you’ll find opportunities to learn about yourself and grow as a person, and even address the underlying causes of your desires to drink, and start to attack this from the roots instead of only keeping it at bay. But just take it as it comes, it’s not a universal pace or even a linear process at all, it can feel backwards at times even, but stick with it and it’ll pay off in its own time. And the more you listen to other recovering people’s experiences, the more ideas and lessons you pick up and use as shortcuts, not having to learn everyone else’s lessons from scratch. There’s really an incredible wealth of knowledge in this place.

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mentally yes, physically I’m on my third life.

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My drinking habits were very similar to yours in high school. By 21 I knew I was an alcoholic but didnt care. I thought I was having fun. Fast forward 12 years and I wish I had quit back then, after I got my 1st DWI, but I continued to drink thru that whole process and beyond.

This place helped me learn a lot of what I can do to help myself. And that’s the bottom line. You have to really want this and work for it. It can and will be challenging but if you stick with it now, you’ll have the rest of your life to live free. I missed out on so much bc of being drunk or hungover.

Thank you for sharing your story. It helps me to hear the point of view from a daughter bc I have a 6yo. The last thing I want for her is to turn out like me. I wish you all the best during this new beginning in your life :heart:

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I started drinking at 15. It didn’t become regualr until I was 18 and was off to college. At that point the goal was to drink as much as possible as often as possible. I knew by 21 that I had a problem but didnt care. I was now able to buy booze so it just fueled the fire.

I knew around 25 that I needed to make a serious change or the lifestyle would eventually kill me. I started going to AA but dealt with multiple relapses. Im now 30 and working hard at staying sober for myself. I cant do it for anyone else.

Glad you found this resource as it has helped me a ton over the years. AA is another great resource that has changed my life. Good luck on your journey and reach out whenever you feel like you’re going to drink or just need to talk.

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I got sober at 24, knew I had problem at 21, was living in a big city by the ocean literally living out my best life and dreams and goals. but I couldn’t put down the bottle. why would I want too though I’m at the prime age for partying and being legal everywhere and living on my own in pure awesomeness. so I didnt stop. I did try but relapsed all the time because I just thought why not I’m so young everyone drinks, everyone parties. but that’s how the booze gets you, its pounded into your head all your life that drinking is normal. but its poison. I drank non stop everyday until I was forced into recovery due to my gallbladder giving out and emergency removal. so, forced into withdrawal and recovery (thank goodness I was in the hospital for medicated detox or else I wouldve had seizures and the whole nine yards to hell). the fight to give up the bottle was hard. so so hard. but I never gave up and had a great man to support me, a family that literally locked me indoors to avoid me getting booze (HORRIBLE OF THEM TO DO TO ME but it helped me get to where I am) , and now I’m 1 year sober and counting. and it’s so worth it to not drink. I feel amazing and am told that I’m glowing all the time.
alcohol is not worth it at any age. give it up while you’re ahead!

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Hi Kim. I’m 20 and had/have a weed addiction due to my poor genetics (family full of addicts) and many mental illnesses. I’m 9 days sober now … It’s nice to know I am not the only young adult with this problem. I’m here for you!

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Hey Kim. This is very brave of you. I’m 19 and I have a weed addiction. I’m 8 days sober and I know how you must feel. I used to think that I was made differently and that I would never find myself addicted to anything. I’d tell myself stories about how the world is wrong for making me feel like I had a problem, then eventually I ran out of stories to tell myself. Now all I think about is how am I going to live the rest of my life fighting a battle that seems unwinnable. Today I woke up feeling sad and yesterday I was super happy and what I can take from both situations is I don’t know how to feel without weed.

Anyway Kim. You aren’t alone, we are all fighting this thing, and you’re never alone in this fight. Age ain’t nothing but a number right.

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Hey sug-- I began smoking weed around 13 and it progressed into alcohol. I had a bestfriend I met in 8th grade. Her sister was a major alcoholic so every weekend I would go over there every weekend and get completely hammered. This continued on almost every weekend until I was about 17. I knew I was young so I didn’t crave it until the weekends when I knew I could drink. Around this time I met a boyfriend who had just turned 21. That was my ticket. We got hammered and stoned almost all the time. Things became toxic and I was able to get out of his grips around last summer. I moved into an apt with my younger sister and our roommates were over 21 so there was constantly a case in the fridge. It got crazy-- I would wake up at 6 am after a long night of drinking even if it was a weekday and drink another beer to go back to sleep. I met a new boyfriend who was sober and I got him drinking just as much as I did. I also acquired a fake id until I turned 21 this past april so I browsed many liquor stores before I was even of age. I knew what I wanted. So yes, there are people like me that got started way too young. I’m on my 4th day now and its getting easier day by day. Feel free to message me, I would love to have a friend that’s around my age sober as well. Much love xx

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@bruneca is one. There are many more :innocent:

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