Anyone getting sober with a partner?

So, my husband and i are both getting sober. We never drink anymore unless we both decide to, which hopefully will be never again. But it’s hard, for sure, bc if one of us is craving, and the other isn’t - or even worse, IS - it’s really easy to talk the other into having a session. I’m lucky he and i are on the same page, we just need to get over this last hiccup…
Looking four any advice or similar situations

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That’s really neat that you are both in recovery together. It’s great to have someone to confide in. I’m hesitant to say this but for me I have to work on my own program. I’m not doing this for anyone but me. It is a great theory but as your post mentioned you can only drink if you both do to me that sounds like a escape clause? Just be supportive for eachother and do not let someone else’s sobriety effect yours. If your neighbor drinks you don’t need to right? So why is your sobriety dependent on your spouses. That’s just my two cents on it. I’m sorry if I’m coming off as harsh but it just seems like it might be to dependent on someone else like it’s not ultimately your responsibility. Good luck and I will cheer you both on!


@Whatnextlex when I decided to get sober, my husband quit drinking also. I am on meds and he isn’t, but we found ourselves both abusing alcohol as the years went by. We have replaced all our alcohol in the house with N.A. beer, and enjoy sharing one every evening. I find it’s better when your spouse helps you and joins you because face it, this ISn’t easy! We are doing the same thing with our diet and exercise goals. Teamwork really does make a difference!

Deff see what you’re trying to say, and i don’t think you’re being harsh!! I get what you’re saying. I guess i do look at it as a way to still drink if we get weak. We know that the work begins there, though, when it gets tough. We are doing it for ourselves, but also for our relationship. Just seeing how other couples have dealt with it…

Yes!! We are also working on our overall health together! Im lucky - he’s a great cook! We drink spritzers, usually plain sparkling water as na triggers us at times. I think its just that sometimes we get weak. Did u guys experience any slip ups at first? What stopped you when u had an intense craving?

I relapsed after 33 days, then he followed. I started going back to meetings and reading the Big book more. The cravings usually erupt during social situations (we love to bowl and go out). I think it’s a good idea to stay home and away from tempting situations for awhile. I just felt miserable and wanted control of my life again. I’m on day 31 again😄

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That’s awesome that you’re right back on the wagon! Yea, it’s been hard getting started but we’re both super dedicated. We are keeping a low profile for now, until we build some confidence😁

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