So I’m back on this app after almost a year. I wasn’t sober at all within that year , I just had giving up trying to stay sober a couple days after downloading this app the first time (made it maybe 3 days sober , relapsed and said fuck it)
Iv been nothing but harsh and brutal to my body , mental & horrible to the ones I love most. My excuse this time for being drunk off 1/2 - 2 pints of whiskey a day was “ I’m better then I was. I don’t argue no more and leave , Im a functional alcoholic because I go to work every day and work good and effecent every time, unless I’m to hungover to work and I call off. Last but not least I never got a DUI so I’m a good alcoholic” That’s what I told myself and others EVERYDAY. Like a fucking loser.
As of recently even drinking was getting boring now. It was actually getting fucking gross to me, the taste I started to hate. Only reason was cause I moved up to drinking 1-2 pints of whiskey a day , every day , even when hungover and I can’t keep anything down id still drink and throw it up right away like I don’t care my body is yelling at me telling me to stop and it’s rejecting it. I forced my self to drink it no matter how nasty it tasted and boring the feeling got to me. That’s when I realized I’m fucking wilding out! Iv gone to far. I was so hungover and throwing up inforced my self to drink 3 pints in one day. I was sick, shaking , having fringers toes back legs arms stomach and lung cramps.. cramps would wake me up for days in a row. I literally felt myself dying …
I decided thats it and I decided to stop. But this is the first time I actually feel like I’m done with it .. I don’t need it .. I hate it .. I hate the taste .. the feeling is whatever now and my body is literally rejecting it and my dumb ass is forcing it down for NO DAMN REASON.
I’m done with it. I really hope this ain’t like all the other 1000 times I’ve tried to quit. I can tell this time is different, so I hope it’s true
Wish me luck & I hope all is well for you too.
Appreciate the read. I think doing stuff like this does help. Keep it up , you got this!
So glad ur back Sounds like ur sick and tired of being sick and tired. Its only up from here, if u stay sober what helped me was to check in here often and read, i attended 12 step meetings online (altho in-person are great too), got myself on a recovery morning routine, exercised, and just started treating my body better.
Remember, our minds will lie to us when it comes to our addiction, and so overtime, when it starts to crave a drink, remember why u quit. Play that tape to the end. Maybe save ur post and refer to it bcuz ur post was very real and raw. It will only get worse if u continue on the path of destruction.
Glad ur here and I hope u find this forum helpful!
Hi,this is exactly how I felt the last time I gave up drink,everything seemed to fall into place,I had learned from all the relapses and it felt like I was one step ahead which gave me a chance to get some momentum going,keep changing things get a few side quests going to keep your mind active.
Congratulations on making a positive decision. It’s a huge step to accept the problem, face it head on and start telling others that’s what you’re gonna do.
Take it in bite sized chunks- what are you going to do TODAY to keep you sober? For some it’s easier not to imagine never drinking again… you have to imagine staying sober today, then get up and do the same tomorrow.
I hope you stay here with us, read the advice and ask for help. Doing that sure helped save my life.
If you don’t, what’s the alternative? As you said yourself - you are drinking yourself to death. 3 pints of whisky? That’ll kill you someday soon man.
If you put as much energy into your sober life as you did your drinking life you’ll have a pretty sweet time.
Welcome back Mikeal. Have a read around and jump into the conversations when you’re ready. I’m grateful that you’re here and ready to stay sober. Do you have a plan to get through the withdrawals?
I looking around my area to see if I can attend a meeting. Iv been once maybe over 10 years ago when I was still young and nieve so I thought it was dumb and left during the meeting. But I am looking to give it another shot since I’m older now and actually know what life is like haha
Yeah I’m definitely about to hop around some of these communities and conversations. Seems like it helps and is positive. Glad to be somewhere that understands what I’m going through with this addiction.
I think I went the worst of it so far. I had it really bad the first 3 days .. bad bad .. almost called 911 bad haha
But I fought thru it and now I just have a few shakes here and there , do have cold sweats often , random anxiety attacks , bad cramping on my hands from the skaking and the every hour thought of drinking just 1 drink. But I feel like I’m going through it and fighting it off pretty good. Any tips ?
You’re definitely in the company of some lovely sober addicts and alcoholics who can absolutely understand what this feels like.
It sounds like you’ve already made it through the worst of it, which is amazing! You literally never need to go through that again if you stay sober from today forward. I found that staying active and being kind to myself helped a lot in the very early days. I journaled a lot about what it all felt like so I could revisit that during a craving. I worked out a lot- cardio was my best friend. Yoga wasn’t as accessible but helped later on. Sometimes it’s about taking it one hour or minute at a time and looking out for your needs being met- eat when your body is hungry, sleep when it’s tired. It sounds basic but it all gets twisted with getting sober. And community is vital. Lots of people here, including me, have gone to treatment or joined sobriety groups such as AA or Recovery Dharma and connected with people in recovery to learn their stories and what works. Being here is a great start! We have an active check-in thread where you can say how you’re doing and track your days. Keep us in your pocket when the waves of cravings hit you okay?
Welcome
Luck will get you nowhere. You have to work recovery daily, at least as much as you used to drink and suffer hangovers.
Read, educate yourself about addiction and recovery and do not pick up the first drink.
Well thank you. Glad to have some people to hear me out and know what it’s like.
Yeah ,it was pretty brutal but I think I got over the worst of it. Actually woke up feeling normal for once.biv only been to a meeting once when I was younger but I am looking too see if their are any in my area. More mature and open minded to it now , so I think it may help.
So far when I tried to quit iv just done it on my own which doesn’t last long at all. So this time I figured I try something new.
Wow that reminds me about the last days of my drinking. I was puking and drinking even when i didnt want to. Theres another way to live. You have to get thru the first week and it gets better (with effort). Hold on tight and stick around
I can understand how fucking it feels I went through the same past so many years and always tried to stop and quit but always tried but this time it’s something real and productive I want to do it im sick and tired of loosing everything i appreciate you buddy for the strength and will power may I also achieve some like those
Yes! Shit was brutal. Never felt anything like it before and I don’t plan on going through that ever again. Plan on staying away from drinking for good now !
These wonderful people have helped me so much , it’s been great to have access to community who you can be open with and have no judgement ! We share success , failure , ups & downs and our hobbies and passions and a few laughs too
It sounds like your ready for the fight and that’s great
I drink Diet Coke with loads of ice in it to help with cravings but that just me .
I also have a lot of hobbies I am trying to get back into and I would recommend getting outside for walks, and if you’re into it a few good TV series lined up to watch
Also sleep , and eat whenever you feel your body is recovering so listen to it
I have never been sober or clean for more than maybe a a week in years and year . But this time I am now on 28days !!
If I can do it you can do it we’re all here for you
I can tell , the community has been nothing but positive and helpful with many tips and suggestions on how to stay sober. Definitely glad I joined and look forward to getting help and eventually helping others.
Yeah Iv been keeping myself occupied when I have those sudden thoughts and cravings. Currently I play video games , listen to a podcast or take my son out to the park and enjoy my time with him. Forsure going to binge watch some shows as well
I don’t drink soda , even when I drank I just drank neat or chase it down with water. But I’m thinking of just getting coffee when I do have those cravings.
These are some of the links to some of the topics but there are loads of topics about all sorts of hobbies ect
You can just scroll through the list when you open it up they are the most recently posted in groups or you can search particular topics using the search at the top of the page .
Sounds like ur sick and tired of being sick and tired. Its only up from here, if u stay sober 
