Thank you, Daniela 
You might be as well right. When I stopped purging (I was a bulimic) I experienced something similar. It took almost a year for my body to look “normal” again. For almost a year I was extremely bloated and looked like I was in early pregnancy. I hated it but it was better than the constant binge-purge cycle and so I accepted the look. When it eventually changed, it was a nice surprise. I guess I feel similarly this time.
Hope you’re doing well 
Good morning everyone
14 days no binge
11 days no sugar
Yesterday was a bit weird. In the morning I had breakfast and then lots of tea due to people visiting me at my mum’s place. That made me feel full and “feeling fat”. Later, I talked about it with my therapist and she shared a chart with me that sometimes we can feel good, sometimes fat but our weight is still the same, it is just a feeling. It can be due to what we ate, bloating, period (in case of women), etc.
Since the first day of my therapy, I was worried that she will come up with writing down what I ate in the day, because it’s something I had to do before, when I had a therapy for my bulimia. I didn’t like it, because I found it impractical at many occasions (e.g. eating outside, or being in the office). She came up with it yesterday and it made me feel like I really don’t want to do this. Then I am thinking that maybe it’s some self - sabotage that I don’t want to do this. It’s quite an important piece of work for sure. Having to pay extra attention to what I eat, when, where and how I feel afterwards will help me to spot some patterns and ways of thinking about which I am unaware otherwise. That’s what happened last time. So I will do it and will do my best to do it properly. Surely it’s not impossible..
Maybe it was the annoyance, or the fact that later I was visiting my grandma who had so much food on the table, that I had strong cravings and feeling like I want to binge. I controlled myself with willpower and ate my grandma’s lovely soup for a “snack” and then I had an extra portion of bread with cheese for my dinner. When I told my therapist that I am skipping having a snack after a dinner, she insisted that I should have something small at least. My mum has got 85% dark chocolate at home, I decided to have it. I don’t consider it “sweets” because I don’t see it the same way like milk chocolate for example. First I thought I’d have 4 squares, but then I found 2 enough and was able to stop myself eating because of it. Which before feeling full wouldn’t necessarily stop me from eating more. So I did well in the end. I wouldn’t say it was 100% perfect but I didn’t binge which matters to me the most.
Today is a new day and I already logged in my first cup of coffee 
Love to all!
Day 86 smoke free, 65 binge free, 20 snacking free.
Yesterday, I had the urge to overeat, but I didn’t. I’m feeling a lot right now: good feelings, beautiful feelings, and yes, still challenging ones. Love is slowly making its way back into my life, and I’m welcoming it with open arms and an open heart (while keeping both feet firmly on the ground).
I’ve been a single mom for many years, so being with a partner again feels like a long-held wish finally coming true. Still, I’m taking things very slowly. I’m practicing mindfulness and awareness, making sure these beautiful, powerful feelings aren’t secretly trying to hijack the steering wheel.
Yesterday, I took some time to breathe and put my legs up the wall - two of my all time favourite life skills. It calmed me down and helped the urge pass without snacks involved.
I’m grateful that my partner is also very mindful and careful about not getting too carried away. He’s strong, clear, and refreshingly grounded. It helps that he has his own history with depression, too, because along the way, he built a pretty solid emotional toolbox.
I am happy and grateful. I’m not confusing this with a Hollywood fairytale. Let’s stay real. It protects us from falling back into addiction.
Have a peaceful day everyone!
Thank you for sharing! I love the chart. It’s sooooo true and I didn’t think about it like this before!
Don’t underestimate the impact of being with family. For me, spending time with my family is something I enjoy, but it also stirs up big emotions. I often try to get some time for myself when I visit my family. I read, breathe, meditate, or use other tools to calm my emotions - no matter if I am aware of them or if they are there silently.
I am glad you had your therapy session for some grounding. Must have felt good 
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Sometimes addictive thoughts come disguised as perfectionism. Be gentle and aware with yourself. You are doing great! 
P.S.: Dark chocolate for me also isn’t „sweets“ 
I really admire how consciously you’re dealing with the feelings and processes happening inside you. Do you realize how extraordinary it is to be able to analyze a conflict so clearly and put it into perspective? I genuinely think it’s wonderful how you did that. And how amazing that you were able to interrupt your pattern so quickly—that is not easy at all.
At the beginning of my own journey, it already felt like a success if emotional eating happened but I managed to stop before it turned into a full binge episode. I didn’t reset my counter if I was able to end the emotional eating in time, before it became a binge attack. You’ve already reached that point.
In my experience, interrupting emotional eating is the next step and the next level. I’m absolutely certain you can do this, because you already have all the tools you need. I’m proud of you, Dana. You’ve got this.
782 sugar
646 UPF
Day 1855 : No binge today. 
Day 2
Feeling alright today with regards to my eating. I wasnt going to join in on my ED Zoom group this morning, but I reminded myself of my goals for 2026. One of those goals was to attend the group every 2nd Monday. So I joined in. It was good. Im glad I went.
On “normal” days, when im able to exercise and eat well, things are good. I dont have that ED voice, trying to persuade me to engage in it. I realized tho that its my emotions that put me in a tough spot. I learned today in group, that its important to practice my healthy coping skills when Im calm, that way, when my emotions are heightened, it will be 2nd nature to use them. I just dont know HOW to practice them or even WHAT to practice, when Im calm. So if anyone has any good coping skills that they would like to share, Im open to hear them 
I need to work on handling my emotions in a better way. Thats my downfall. Ive been trying to escape feeling emotion since I was little, so I know this will take some time. But its not impossible! I feel positive today!
Also… thank you @Jana1988 and @DanielaJ for ur encouraging and supportive words to me. You actually have no idea how much that meant to me
I learned today in group, that its important to practice my healthy coping skills when Im calm, that way, when my emotions are heightened, it will be 2nd nature to use them. I just dont know HOW to practice them or even WHAT to practice, when Im calm. So if anyone has any good coping skills that they would like to share, Im open to hear them
That’s interesting, I also don’t have any idea what they meant and would be curious to know.
15 days no binge
12 days no sugar
I have a half of a month without binging whilst being in the Czech Republic, wow!!! 
There were times when I was close to binging but I didn’t cross the line. Feeling of fatness which I am experiencing last few days doesn’t help and is one of the triggers despite it makes no sense because I should want to keep eating well rather than binge and make the feeling worse. But it’s more like “I am fat anyway, so I can as well binge and enjoy myself”. The thing is that binge isn’t enjoyable, is it… It’s morning and I feel fat already, sometimes it comes after food, now I just feel fat constantly. I am thinking of @DanielaJ and her words that it’s just my body adjusting and I am hoping that I’ll feel differently maybe one day again. This is a quite unpleasant feeling.
I have planned big family meals for every day from today till Friday so something to be prepared for. Today is perhaps the worst one - 3 course menu in a Mexican restaurant. I and my partner got this from my parents as a Xmas present to go with my brother and his wife who got the same voucher. My parents had this 3 course meal and liked it but my mum also claims that it’s impossible to eat it all and that so we should not eat much through the day and save space in our stomachs. See, this kind of dining would no longer be my choice. It’s such a nonsense to starve myself through the day so I can eat a lot before sleep. But I know they meant it well. I am just ready to eat as a normal person and take away whatever is left. I definitely won’t have a dessert unless they have just fruit or something, but I doubt it when it’s a Mexican restaurant. Someone else can have my dessert.
What I am proud of is that I called my grandma yesterday to tell her not to cook sweet dumplings as she planned to. I would have to break my sugar counter and start again. My grandma knows I love these dumplings, so again, it was meant well. But unfortunately I must be firm and not to have it now. I promised myself at least one month without sugar and I really want to be able to do at least the month. I already almost don’t have the pain in my lower back, I am finding easier to get out of the bed and generally feel better (less swollen, less pains, less difficulties to move in the morning, etc.). For example my feet would be swollen at the bottom when getting off the bed and I’d have to massage them a bit to be even able to stand up. Super weird. That is now gone.
I eat worse here in Czech but I am hoping to change this back once back at home in the UK. I feel more bloated here and hence the feeling fat as well probably. Too much carbs and no movement at all. At home I exercise. Here I don’t even go for a walk (no time).
Last thing I must note is that @DanielaJ was right about needing my own time because of the stress. My family isn’t exactly peaceful, we have got many disagreements between different family members and when I come to visit, everybody feel the need to tell me something bad about each other. It’s tiring and I don’t care. I just want to sit and enjoy people around me who I love everybody in the same way. I understand it might be easier for me when we’re not in touch so often so there isn’t really space for annoyance. Besides it being different for my family living together and seeing each other often. My dad also still complains about his ex who broke his heart over a year ago and tells me about how bad she was for million times. I wish he could get over it. In the same time he’s friends with her.. 
Anyways, I don’t want to be writing too much about my family problems 
Have a lovely day everyone!!
You are facing a lot. Sounds challenging!
Family isn`t always peaceful and it can be triggering…
I am proud of you that you are in a state of awareness and you see that you are in a process. Changing behaviour and changing perspective go hand in hand (is that correct English ? I don`t know 
)
Is there anything that feels like a safe space where you can calm down? Did you ever try calming breathing patterns? For me, this one works best:
4-2-6 Breathing
If you do this even for just one minute, it calms down your nervous system and you can do it anytime, anywhere.
@butterflywoman This is also one of my coping mechanisms when I am dealing with big feelings. I sometimes do this when I am waiting somewhere, just to get some practice and then I can use it more easily when I need it. When I feel big overwhelming emotions, I try to sit with them, do the breathing technique and observe the feeling. It usually takes just a few minutes until the feelings start to change in intensity and “colour”.
I am proud of you, and also me. I love this thread and the support we give each other!
I find mindfulness meditations very helpful as a means of long term training my mind. The Insight Timer app has tons of free guided meditations. Recovery Dharma meetings are based on buddhist mindfulness practices and always include a meditation.
783 sugar
647 UPF
Second check-in.
Tonight, I have eaten too much. Not on purpose, but I felt it was too much when I was done. Wasn‘t the best food choice either.
(Not so) funny thing is: What I consider now as „too much“, had been the start of a binge eating attack just like two months ago. I would have gone on an on with snacking and binging all night.
My eating did change so much, and I am deeply grateful. I feel a bit too full now, but I will be able to sleep. So happy to be binge free.
Well done, Daniela! Sometimes we will probably over eat but as long as it won’t change to binging we can live with it I guess 
Of course I would not like over eating to be a “new thing”, but I realise that it can happen. Hope you will feel better soon!
Day 1856 : No binge today.
16 days no binge 
13 days no sugar 
Good morning
A miracle happened yesterday and I didn’t eat my dessert during the dinner at the restaurant where my partner and I went to with my brother and his wife. I felt bad leaving the half of the very tasty looking dessert to get wasted but I just knew that I must not to eat it. I had a flat white (coffee) instead.
I over-ate on the main. I couldn’t even concentrate on anything else but on the food. It was all presented on long wooden boards and we were supposed to choose what we fancy and put it on a small plate. Soon I lost track about what and how much I already ate, especially when I am not that familiar with the portions and types of Mexican kitchen. I prefer when they serve you your own plate, so you have an idea how much you’re supposed to eat.
At home I had to have tea supporting digestion which helped me to feel better and I even craved a little bit of a dark chocolate afterwards 
It was too late and I felt like I ate enough so I didn’t have any. It’s quite nice to have a choice now. Before it would be just that craving = eating it, no matter what I want or not. Now craving is finally becoming just an emotion which I don’t necessarily need to follow 
Today I feel very bloated and full. I know that accordingly to my therapist I should have a breakfast followed up with other 5 meals (including snacks), but I don’t want to. I feel like if I’d do that I’d forever feel 
. Despite being aware that I am not supposed to try to undo the previous day by restricting food in the following day, I am unwilling to eat right now. It simply feels too much. Maybe I will feel differently later
Today, I have planned an early lunch at my grandma’s and then 5 hours later a dinner with my dad at another restaurant. I am finding it difficult to stick to a “6 meals a day” plan when being on holiday. Apparently it must be 6 meals so my body learns that it won’t starve ever again. I hope I don’t have to eat like this for life because I am finding 4 meals the most ideal, not 6. In 6 there are too many snacks to my liking.
Here’s a photo of me, my partner, my brother and his wife taken at the restaurant 
I am also happy you have a choice now! You are doing great!
I know the idea of 6 meals per day. I am no therapist, so I can‘t say if it’s necessary or if there is another way.
My personal opinion: If you feel that 4 meals keep you satisfied, maybe you could discuss it with your therapist? In my experience, no snacking helps my gut with digestion. I feel less bloated when I eat proper meals with no snacking. If I feel hungry, I can still eat some nuts, if I need it.
It was hard for me to leave food when I know it will be thrown away. But one simple thought helped me with this: It will help no one if I eat it. And I don’t want to serve as a trash bin.
Again, I think you are doing great! Keep on going 
784 sugar
648 UPF
Day 88 smoke free, 67 binge eating free, 22 snacking free.
I am greateful I am returning to my routines today. Have a peaceful day everyone!
