So I’ve been using sober timer android app for couple of days to motivate myself at refraining from taking buprenorphine (~5 days since last used) and decided to come to say hi. At december I went too close to edge with buprenorphine and I’ve seen enough to know what opiates can do to a person and to know I don’t want it for myself (Or anyone really but today I’ll give myself permission to be selfish). There are other drugs (too much cannabis, alcohol 2-3 times a month, rarely amphetamines, sometimes benzodiazepines, lyrica etc.) I use but opiates are priority no 1. I don’t really consider myself an addict but propably, no matter what I think, am just that. My drug problem is mostly social and pretty much all of my friends have some kind of drug problem so if I want social life, I’ll often have to go and watch as someone keeps on trying to find a vein in a good enough condition to inject what-not into. Add that introversion, depression and town I live in and it’s hard to find a healthy ways to kill time. Btw I have never tried IV or never will. Needles freak me out. Well at least my phobias have some advantages
It’s friday and I don’t have strong need to drug myself. Problem is that even if introvert I still often feel myself lonely. Time is 22:45, my sleep pattern is mangled and if I don’t want to be alone… Well yeah. Already explained that part. I guess I’ll go warm up sauna and sweat loneliness and energy out. Maybe I’ll get to sleep before sunrise.
Oh yeah. I’m from Finland. We don’t have sunrises.
Also, good on you for your 5 days. I can’t speak to the drugging, but can relate as a recovering alcoholic. I found AA was a great way to get through it and came along with a great community. That was key as isolating was a big factor in my drinking. Maybe NA would be a help for you as well.
Thanks for warm welcomes! And sunshine is also welcome I’ve thought about NA but there are things that make me feel nervous about it. Maybe not good enough reasons to keep from going but reasons still. I’ll have to think about it some more.
I wish you all the best. This is half my prob also,everyone I know uses what drug or another. Me,myself is an crack addict. I’ve been on methodone for my opiate addiction since 2007 & done excellent in this department & haven’t had an drink since 2007 either. I had a dose eval today & she brought up 'baclofen’for cravings & urges with a cocaine addiction,it an muscle relaxant but use it for cocaine & alcohol dependency. You need an script to get it so I’m going to talk to my PCP bout ot
My problem at moment is crack cocaine & I heard ‘baclofen’ helps with urges & cravings from coke but you need a script to get it. I’m going to talk to my PCP about it. She knows I’ve been battling addiction for past few yes so I think she’ll have no problem with writing me a script. Just wanted to share what I learned today.
Thanks, I wish you best too! Also congrats for those ~12yrs without alcohol! I’ve never heard of baclofen before. Sounds interesting. I hope you get to common understanding with your PCP.
Btw. Just got out of sauna. 30min of ~80°C happiness! Really invigorating. I highly recommend it to everyone.
Jealous of your sauna, Enzo! I used to live in Tallinn and they’re less of a thing there than in Suomi, but still great for a natural high when you can find one. Hope you got through the night without giving in.
You still get cravings taking a strong opioid such as methadone because it breaks down your mind still. Your not in total control of your mind and is still artificially stimulating the brain. Yes you quit opiates and now take another opioid to maintain sadly there is little difference then that its legal…these medications are not miracle sure cure drugs. Just a thought… Do you like dosing on methadone daily? Is it any different then when u used opiates? Maybe consider talking to your doctor to taper down on the methadone before looking into more prescriptions.
Mornin’ y’all! @Mephistopheles Helsinki is little too far for me to travel but if I’ll happen to hang around there I’ll check it out. Thanks for idea. @seastreet Night went ok, sauna really helped me to fall asleep. I’ve played with thought of moving somewhere with little… frendlier climate but living without sauna is just too much for me
I made today tabs for all the substances I use to sober timer (minus tobacco coffee and tea). Buprenorphine 5 days, cannabis little over 1 day, alcohol 16,5 hours (happened to have 1 beer. Alcohol aint big problem for me but still better to be careful), random pills ~14 days and amphetamines ~21 days.
Dusk is setting. Weather is blue, I’m blue, everything is blue. And it’s so cold. Weather is freezing but propably opiate withdrawals are also to blame. No cravings tho so not everything’s bad
I am 18 days clean from opiates/heroin, trust me it can be done. I’ve tried before with Suboxone (was on it for a few years) and it did help but trying to come off that was worse than coming off dope (took me over a month to come off that).
After you get through the first week or so of physical withdrawals from regular dope, it’s all mental after that. Kratom has really helped me, a lot of people will say kratom isn’t really tested yet, but from personal experience, it’s not habit forming and helps very much with the physical symptoms. I only took it the first couple weeks, then stopped (it is absolutely not habit forming, and I would recommend to any opiate user who is struggling with the initial withdrawal).
If you ever want to chat, let me know! As a fellow opiate addict I can empathize with everything you’re going through. I also covered up my loneliness and depression with opiates.
@Duckieht Thanks for motivation! I’ve tried kratom couple of times and it really might help with getting over first days. It’s just that as far as I know kratom is quite illegal here. Finnish law can be riddiculous. I might not be able to build new fence around my yard but if some foreign company finds gold vein under my garden then I have almost no way to stop them start mining on my yard.
Mmmm… Digressing…
Yeah that would be a problem if you can’t access it. It’s still legal in the US, although there has been talk about trying to ban it. You can get it in any smokeshop/head shop here.
If you can’t get kratom, then I would highly recommend melatonin for night time, to be able to fall and stay asleep more easily (it can be very uncomfortable trying to sleep during withdrawals). Also B12 vitamin for energy and mood lifting during the day. I also just take a general multi vitamin to make sure I’m getting nutrients since it can be hard to eat during withdrawals as well.
Above all this, if you can get CBD in your country, I would HIGHLY recommend it. You would typically get CBD oil and just take 3-10 mg once a day or so, and it helps with physical as well as mental symptoms of withdrawals. It’s a little pricey here (which is why I’ve stuck with kratom, since it’s cheaper here and easier to get), not sure about how accessible it is where you’re from. It can literally be a lifesaver, there are tons of stories you can read online about addicts who were able to stay sober with just CBD.
Well there are cannabis based medicines in Finland but they are quite rare and can cost hundreds (yes multiples of hundred) of euros per month. Also they are considered the_last_possible_choice and even then you have to find doctor who is willing to risk his career, become veteran of multiple paper wars and hope someone accepts it as compensatable. If you don’t own Kone (lift company) or Nokia you are too poor to pay for medicinal cannabis products on your own. If you have neurological pain, opiates are considered less bad than CBD products. As I said, Finnish law can be little weird…
I had some time before bed and decided to try something adopted from steps. I have a small black notebook and I’ll try to fill page with stuff I’m grateful and another with things I’m sorry about daily, let’s see how far it goes…
I’ve been thinking how it would feel to relapse and take drugs again. To see timer go from 8 days to zero in an instant. It feels great to see timer ticking towards double digits but at same time it brings stress. What if I happen to be in a wrong place at wrong time? If someone offers me a line and I take it? I would throw all of my progress away just for a pile of white powder and nausea. Definitely that wouldn’t be enough. I’d go and search for more drugs, snort until I puke, smoke pot until my eyes bleed and disappear again to someones flat for days. I’d use most of my money to drugs and couldn’t pay my bills, propably lose my house. My family would worry about me and they have enough problems already.
Couple of years ago, by accident (ok let’s call it stupidity. I knew the risks but didn’t think about it), I took lots of lyrica and tramadol. They really don’t go well together. I had epileptic cramps including moments of unconciousness for hours but was so messed up I didn’t understand situation completely. My friends were worried about me but more worried about police to call an ambulance. Instead we left to search for benzodiazepines to ease up cramps. I was lucky and cramps eventually eased. If I continue using something similar will happen. Maybe not today or even this year but definitely at some point. I can do better, I have to.
I have always wanted an espresso machine. I have found model I really like (Izzo Alex Duetto) but it’s expensive af. If I keep away of drugs and put even half of saved money aside I’d have some extra to spend on something nice and eventually I could buy one. I need to keep out of dangerous places for some time and make a toolbox that helps me to remember why I want to be sober and I need to get help. Tomorrow, NA.
Are you guys still going strong? Can I pop in on your thread? Just starting day 2 of no opiates. Am taking kratom. We’ll see if it helps when the real shit hits the fan.
Hi! Still strong, 43 days clean! When I started going to NA, I pretty much forgot this thread. Use it as much as you like. Mostly I’ve been talking with couple of finnish people here. Keep strong, first days are worst but eventually it gets better Just don’t do this alone. Consider going to meetings and getting to know some clean people. Life can be awesome when sober
Just don’t do this alone. Consider going to meetings and getting to know some clean people. Life can be awesome when sober