Calming Fight sounds like an oxymoron. But, I had one last night with my boyfriend. I guess it was more of a disagreement or heated conversation. Anyway, it used to be when we would talk about difficult things in our relationship, specifically if it was a deficiency on his end (Lord knows I have plenty of my own!) somehow the conversation would always turn to my drinking and how everything and anything wrong in our relationship was my fault because of my addiction. While a lot, and I mean a lot, could be honestly attributed to the alcohol it wasn’t the cause or root of all of our problems. During our heated conversation last night (over standard married life stuff) I had an almost our of body calming sensation when I realized the conversation couldn’t take a turn to blame the alcohol. There was no alcohol to blame!! We actually talked. We had to. There was no easy escape, no easy blame game to bring me to tears in my failures as an alcoholic girlfriend. We actually worked through some feelings from both sides. We listened to eachother and set some goals for our next couple of days and weeks to keep working on. What a wonderful feeling.
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