Cannot live like this anymore

Deleted this post. .

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What do you think your fear is based on?

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Rational or irrational fear?

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@Steve92 Hey Steve, can you put your hand on your heart and just feel it thump? Breathe through that beat and say, I am love, I am safe - over and over again. It may take a minute for the anxiety to calm, but It will bring you back to the present and out of despair. I too suffer and have felt close to the end. Someone told me to practice cold showers as it teaches you to breathe and to know you are safe. Be okay, this too shall pass

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You know, Steve. Finally confessing your behavior to your wife and coming clean is an extremely traumatic experience. Immediately following a crisis/decision stage comes the shock stage. I can imagine the large number of unknowns. What’s going to happen with my marriage, my job, my reputation, my life?

Spouses refer to this day as D-Day. And it’s probably the lowest point of the life of both the addict and spouse. I know it was for me. And you experienced this just a few days ago.

All this brings trauma, stress, and anxiety. Then there’s the additional stress of letting go of my addiction. This thing that I held onto as the best thing in the world. In my bubble, nothing came 1/10th as close to sex. And to imagine life without it? I figured that what’s the point of living?

Of course, all of that was a lie. I confused sex with porn. And the pleasure it gave me was an illusion. But still, in that moment of surrendering this over to God,
I was absolutely feeling the most painful pain ever.

Perhaps this D-Day is impacting you more than you realize. It will get better. You’ll come through this. It won’t be easy. But it can’t get much worse as long you keep pressing on.

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Start speaking good positive things, thoughts, wants, needs into your life. Change how you think about yourself and your health. It’s just one thing at a time. You will see a huge difference. Stay away from negative people don’t allow others to bring you down. Don’t watch the news. Start listening to positive motivational speakers. Les brown or earl nightingale, Steve Harvey, Bernie Siegel. To name a few of the greatest. When those negative self destructive thoughts come flooding in just turn everything off and refocus on your goals and dreams for yourself. Mentally, emotionally and physically. I will pray for your inner peace and strength!

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LAMICTAL. A prescription drug from my neurolgist. It ABSOLUTELY WORKS on all types of anxiety! Check it out online. :slightly_smiling_face:

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Hey Steve.

Do you read the Bible?

Jesus can give you relief from stress and he is the most amazing healer.

Surrender to him and give your life to him.

God loves you

Amen

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