Day 5 and I’m feeling more determined. Faced court today arraignment. Was feeling anxious all weekend but today I overheard one of the lawyers talking. He said that officer cannot be in court because he is responding to a suicide. Wow I thought and I’m sitting here feeling pitiful for myself. Starting think of the family and the one who didn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. So, got my court date public lawyer left there and vowed to reach out for help if things get out of hand but also to work this to the end. Changed my routine today. After work I usually call my hippie friend who likes me as a drinking buddy. I called her and all she wanted to know was the details of my messed up dui. Talked about the other drinking buddies said they felt sorry for me. Wow no one called or checked up or offered help so I politely told her tell them I’m ok and bye because I’m changing my routine. I know they will still say they feel sorry for me because I had to quit drinking. I know the truth I could still drink and go to them tell them how bad my life is but no I’m changing my routine. She said oh the other bar is good you can get cabs. I said it’s okay for you and enjoy but my life has to change. No hard feelings towards these people but I know now you have to want to change and to feel joy in your life again. I never fit in because I work and I’m a thinker…think too much at times but quit thinking about where I was or who I was hanging around. Felt like since my husband died I shouldn’t experience any joy and lost who I was. I drank with and to be around these people. I had others asking what I was doing I couldn’t explain except for loneliness and heartache. But I wasn’t healing I was sabotaging my life because my husband is gone. I’ve spent six years saying I’m lost and now going on six days sober I can say I really want to be found by me. I changed my routine today and so help me I am going to fight to change it more one step at a time. Thank you for this site and letting me share. I haven’t had sober friends in years but you all helped so much this weekend to get me through and are helping today to get me through… I just have to keep it going thanks!!
Wow such a powerful share! I can feel your passion. Keep taking things one day at a time.
We are here for you
And big congrats on 6 days sober!!!
Congrats on making an important decision - could be one of the most important ones, definitely was for me. Keep coming back and sharing! You can continue sharing on this thread you created so you can see a timeline of your progress, or check in on the daily check in thread. I’m glad you’re here!
So happy to hear from you today Kathy - been thinking about you all day. Really appreciate your share - so powerful and heartfelt. I am thrilled for your new routing, your new way of thinking and just your new chance at a sober life. Do keep checking in her and updating on this thread - as @RosaCanDo mentioned it can be your personal journey diary.
So glad you are on this journey with us. Have a wonderful evening my friend.
wow, this was so inspiring. Im a singe mom and even though everyone sees me as a social butterfly i always feel so alone most of the time. Im grateful that through stopping to drink I can be abit more clear headed and work on my spiritual life, but you are so right in saying that routine has to change…Thank you for that! And well done!
Kathy, it’s so good to see you here, and thank you for sharing
Wow lady, you have had an epiphany!
They are only drinking buddies, not true friends. True friends don’t hear that you want to go sober, then try to encourage you to drink and take a cab! True friends will be on your side, and accept the life changes you’ve made for yourself.
You’re going to have to branch out and meet new people, genuine friends. Have quality relationships with people that really care for you, and are supportive of you.
Well done to you, you should be proud of yourself! We are here for you
Ok yes glad to use this as a journal. Having tough stressful day and it feels so long. Having cravings to stop after work and have a cold one but I know I would not just have one. Thoughts on what to do after work are running through my head. Going to store after work to get some food but it’s hard to just go straight home after that. Shew I haven’t been very domestic in years because of reasons I don’t want to go into right now but any suggestions on how to stop thinking about drinking after work??
I’ve been out walking the dog and gym later on in the evening, to stop myself from wanting a drink, trying to do other things
Amazing share and very brave of you to do what youve done too, its not easy to change up your life its scary but you can do this…put as much effort into not drinking as you did to drink and youl be well on your way…keep sobriety as your number 1 priority, protect it with all your might and go about getting to know yourself again, we are all here to vent to if u feel like picking up or need to talk shit out
Sorry the day’s been stressful — if you don’t want to go home right away…
Can you go to the park (if weather is nice enough).
Get some ice cream and walk around?
Just walk around a shopping center to window shop?
Go to craft store to check it out - possibly get more ideas for your paintings?
Go to a bookstore (most have coffee shops) and sit back and read
If you belong to a gym - get a workout in
Let us know what you decide on - hoping for a relaxing sober evening for you
Things to do after work:
Go see a movie
Go to a museum
Go into the city and walk around
Or away from the city and have a nature walk
Have a picnic in a park
Go to a meeting and meet some new friends
Hang out with us from anywhere (that’s the best part for me)
Grab some new materials for your artwork
Get dinner at your favorite restaurant
Buy yourself something nice with the savings from quitting your DOC
Take a nap
The world is your oyster
Do whatever makes you happy and doesn’t tempt you to drink
You all are awesome!! Great ideas and I’m home. Drove right by the bars. Actually feels good to come home just not use to it. You all I have a daughter I live with and I’m mom and caretaker. She is physically challenged and at times I feel like I’m living her life and mine. She is physically challenged and cannot do a lot but there is a lot she can do. I go out with these buddies to get away. It’s a lot on me at times. She is so good and has kept me going after my husband died but at times it gets overwhelming. I haven’t felt like I’ve had my own life. When I do go out everyone just always ask where she is. I started feeling invisible and just wanted my own time and thought these buddies were my time out and all but I’ve been wrong. The life I lead before my husband passed was good. Now I just have to be me and live this way again and change the routine. All your comments about what to do are things I love to do and have not been doing them!! Now I want to. And I can do them alone. I don’t have a lot of alone time. I love the idea of going to the bookstore. Tonight chose to go out to a few stores and yes got more art supplies and a treat for myself. Felt good. The treat which is something nice is cream horns. Yes a pastry…a little indulgence for me. Lol. I also got my drink of choice for this weekend… Clearly Canadian sparkling waters. They are a little expensive and feel fancy like I think of wine. Starting to like how I’m thinking and feeling I keep reminding myself of that. Thanks for the ideas and going to incorporate them into my new routine Starting a movie right now…have a good peaceful night all and thanks again!!!
I’m out of hearts for posts guess I’ve spent too much time on here today (if that’s even possible, not in my opinion) but i definitely understand having a challenged child. My 13 year old has autism and she gets overstimulated easily, and is heavily bullied at school because she’s an easy target . And my 5 year old little one also has autism and is sensory seeking all the time, as well as mostly non verbal (i think she’s getting closer to the “preverbal” category now) and i haven’t gone out almost anywhere aside from work in the last few years. And even at work i am constantly waiting on a call or text saying i need to come home.
It’s easy to lose ourselves, or to feel like we’ve lost ourselves. But chatting with friends I’ve made here helps me feel connected and like I’m my own person again. I am glad you were able to go get some art supplies from the store and are home watching a movie. It sounds like a happy evening
Eye opening when you hear that other people have similar things going on in life…it’s when I don’t feel like I’m alone. Thanks for sharing regarding your fam! Hope you have a good happy night as well! Going to bed sober is getting to be a new routine that I’m feeling good about. Hugs to all and thanks for being there!!
So happy to hear that you had some good quality “me” time. Sounds like you had a great time.
How lovely for your daughters to have her mum healthy and sober. I can only imagine being a single parent and being a caretaker. Do you get any help?
Everyone needs some “me” time and im happy to hear that youll be getting back to the activities that you used to enjoy ans now will again.
I so love Clearly Canadian sparkling water…the blackberry is my favorite
I am thrilled for another sober night for you- hope ypu enjoyed the movie
Feeling a little tired this morning but up and at work. I can take a little tired versus headache, nausea, sweats etc.
I wanted to ask what you all started to notice first as you abstained from drinking.
I have noticed my skin is way less dry. My hair feels soft and I do not feel bloated. I see things now that I haven’t noticed in awhile.
I could say this is crazy it’s only been five days but I had already abstained for two weeks before hand drank on a weds so started the day after.
Instead I’m going to say it’s been 5 days almost six and I won’t say only. Just feeling good that I’m noticing new things. Gives me encouragement to go forward. Also, gives me the strength to say I’m a non-drinker.
Want to notice something new each day because that way I feel my eyes are open
The opposite of addiction is connection…even better connecting to likeminded people like us! I really admire you for taking these first steps and throwing yourself into your sobriety with such enthusiasm! Go girl!! Reading your thread has really lifted me…thank you a couple of ideas for u that helped me right at the beginning…allen carrs easy way to quit drinking is great to read or listen to to change your minset around drinking and the Stutz documentary on netflix is great for starting over in life in general, big love to you and your daughter
Getting ready to cook tacos….came straight home from work…just documenting because it helps. Work was better, less tired today. Just feeling it already and at times it’s scary but then I welcome it. Shows me how in bad shape I was!! Here is to feeling the good vibes and sending them out to all to feel the energy!! It’s a rollercoaster ride but we can get off at times, slow down reflect and know that you can enjoy the ride. This week I’ve not only been getting to work earlier I am getting more done. First week I know but feeling accomplished. Here’s to another good night’s sleep all!! Kat
Tacos sound great! You should post a picture in the foodies thread so we can all admire I’ll post the link below.
I’m glad work is getting better and you have more energy! It’s amazing how much better we can feel when we’re not poisoning ourselves with alcohol or other substances.
Here’s to day 5 (almost 6!) I’m super proud of you!