Congratulations @M-be-free49 you’re AMAZING!!! 
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Menno, I just love the beautiful pictures you post. I hope you’re enjoying your well deserved holiday.
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I just love Amsterdam so much. Probably as beautiful of a place as there is. I love the vibe there.
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I was thinking the same thing! So many beautiful pictures @Mno and I love that you always say love from Amsterdam we love you too!
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Why am I only just seeing this?!?!? Argh!!!
Awesome that you’re back. Awesome number(s) 
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I hear ya!! My ‘all the 5’s’ will be around 4am this coming week. When drinking I’d be awake. Now, while I Really want to catch it, the odds are not in my favor 
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Hiya!! Love your wallpaper!!! 
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Day 230: Sorry, amigos, for not catching up with this thread…so behind! Congratulations to those who are hitting milestones! We’re doing the thing, no?
It has been a glorious weekend so far, and more to come! Some heart to heart conversations with people I love have made all the difference after the near relapse/victory over addiction I had last week. I still haven’t responded to those of you who replied on my post about it on my “Sober Rosa Feels All the Feels” thread, but I will get to it soon. EDIT to say, if anyone else has thoughts to share, please please feel free to do so. I would love to have it be a resource going forward. I really hope that it can help people to read about what can happen when you’re amping up your recovery work, getting ready to start a new treatment or intensive activity, or any big change of that sort. For me, and apparently for many others, it can be a trigger to use. I was not anticipating this, but thank goodness I had tools I could fall back on and I used them to stay sober. I always considered triggers to be things like reminders of activities tied to drinking, things like grief or other distressing emotions, etc. Here I am thinking I am working hard on my recovery and doing the next right things, and that on top of a big stressor led me to stand in front of the beer cooler and talk myself down from buying something. I am so grateful that I did the work that I did in my early recovery to have these tools in place. It was as simple as really spending time on listing my pros and cons about drinking, spending a ton of time reading and engaging here on TS, building sober relationships, and practicing self-talk. The self-talk part is crucial - for those of us (I think it’s many of us) who have a running dialogue in our heads, it is really helpful to practice shifting the dialogue when the negative and using-based thoughts come. Remember, we are not our thoughts or even our emotions, and we can sit with them and get through them or even change them, but it takes training and practice.
Gosh, another Rosa ramble…guys, I’m back! 
I am looking forward to a conversation with my temp sponsor about her experience with AA and start talking about step work this afternoon. That, and the really meaningful conversations I have had with my partner in life, my husband Eric, have really helped me stay honest and keep him engaged in my recovery, also.
Off to meal prep and enjoy this sunny yet brisk Sunday. Sending love your way, amigos.
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Why don’t you try another fellowship, or womens only meetings?
I am not saying 12 step is the only way to go but there are ways to feel comfortable participating in them without having the feelings you are having. When I got clean this time around it was my first introduction to NA, I was raw, being so broken infront of a bunch of strange men scared me. It actually shook me to my core, but the more time I spent listening and learning the more I understood that the words in the literature, the gender of the company in the room, none of it matters; what matters is that we were all there for the same reason. I heard my story coming out of many men’s mouths and that created a real bond, a bond that was ruined for me years ago.
I challenge you to try again, try NA, the literature is not as male oriented. I mean if you are anything like me eventually you will get to a point that you will do anything to get sober, if I hadn’t I was going to die.
Good luck to you and welcome back, takes courage to get back on your feet. Stay strong.
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M?
I don’t actually see the 300. But I’m assuming you made it since your 299 post last night. Maybe she’s sleeping in. She doesn’t usually stay up that late.
Have a great
I’m so proud of you
This is my favorite Oscar of the day
Oh and sorry I’m not sticking zucchini in a chocolate cake even for a big 300 celebration. I’ll throw in some ice cream.
Have a great day lovely lady
@M-be-free49
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@Foreverfree36 Congratulations on one week.
@Its_me_Stella Awesome numbers lady but honestly just seeing you back here makes me smile.
@M-be-free49 Congratulations on 300 days. I’m grateful for you as well. Your presence on my journey is appreciated.
@SoberWalker Congratulations on 950 days.
@littlemisschatterbox Congratulations on 19 months.
@Rockstar24777 Welllll, here we sit in the same spot again. Good luck with the job and as always my thoughts and prayers are with you.
313 days. It took my all yesterday to not be the blunt bitch with our roommate. During my morning coffee he told me of a $150 pair of shoes that is on sale for almost 1/2 price. I inquired if he needs orthodics and he indicated not, they’re just a pair of hiking shoes. Although I entertained his conversation I didn’t voice my opinion. Later in the day he’s on my man’s tablet shopping for golf clubs. Again I bit my tongue but later voiced my opinion to my man that perhaps this man needs to worry about becoming self-sufficient prior to buying extras. He doesn’t even buy much food right now & is constantly bumming cigarettes. Perhaps he should be looking for his own place before looking to buy hobby items. Turns out he was also told that the rent he’s paying is insufficient and is less than agreed upon. I’m usually all about helping people but this guy is ridiculous. I basically told my man that it’s costing my mental health more than we’re benefitting and that I just wish he would move out already. Once I gain employment and am able to contribute more financially I plan to push uncomfortably and until then I am no longer staying quiet when the roommate discusses his expenditures.
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@jim @Rockstar24777 maybe it’s time to show you all the ugly side of Amsterdam too Way too touristy here as it is. Except for the last year that is. Anyway. I’ll never say anything but love from Amsterdam because that is what I feel for all of you
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Thank you @Squirt everything will work out for us the way it’s supposed too. Proud of you!!!
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That’s awesome Mno thank you!
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My first experience in Amsterdam was arriving in the train station and a very aggressive street person asked me for money. Think I gave him a pound. It wasn’t enough. A Dutch businessman saw I was stressed and grabbed this guy and pulled him away from me. Forever grateful for that. I also was in a coffee shop during a drug raid. But such a beautiful country. Tulips!
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Just checking in. Had a nice weekend and another birthday party. Birthday season is finally over here lol the kids are kind of one after another so we call it birthday season. Now counting down to my mountain trip this summer!
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@Squirt wishing you so much good luck that you get atleast one job offer 
@anon35096624 congrats on a sober birthday 
@Foreverfree36 congrats on your week
@M-be-free49 congrats on 300 days
@Beforemy30s congrats on double digits
@SoberWalker congrats on 950 days
@littlemisschatterbox congrats on 19 months+
@Rockstar24777 prayers for some good news
258 days no alcohol.
226 days no cocaine.
I’ve had a strange day today. I’ve ran out of things to do and it’s a big shock to my system. Haven’t been able to relax at all. Outside it has been very dull for the first time in a nice while and that always sinks my mood too. I’ve binged again today.
For the new week I am setting the intention of getting back on track with my diet, and walking around the lake atleast once a day. I’ve just started reading a book called ‘The Motivation Switch’, it apparently contains 77 motivation hacks, here’s hoping!
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Wow, 300 days already. Time is running so fast. Congratulations! 
So good to follow your stories and progress here!
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Must be some time ago. Town has been gentrified quite a lot recently. Some good but not all. Normal people can’t afford to live here no more 
- Went back maybe in 2002. Haven’t been to Europe since
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