Today it is Matt. Let’s make sure this is the last time though. Together we can do this. Stay strong and all success to you.
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Very useful chapter! Thanks for sharing. 
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Hey all, checking in on day 479. I hope everyone has a good one today!
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Day 421
Productive day off, lil cleaning, lil zooming, lil doing odd chores.
I can barely believe I used to plan to drink in the morning, and sleep it off in the afternoon and then be a regular mother and wife in the evening.
Even if I could do it, what a shitty day off. News-flash - I usually couldn’t do it and was still drunk and useless in the evening.
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Good that you’re documenting your withdrawal experience, Matt. Can I recommend you spend some time writing about it on paper? That way you have something tangible to read the next time you have a craving. Gosh, it helped me so much to have that piece of paper, in my case a page in my journal that I attached a tab to so I could have quick access to it. Hang in there, you’ll get through this. And the you that is present now doesn’t ever have to come back ever again. Remember that.
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Congratulations !! You’ve always been such an inspiration - and your quote further reflects that !! 
Happy 600 !!!
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@Dragonflygirl82 I missed it earlier…Congrats on 600 days!! I’m sad you aren’t around as much anymore but so glad you’re living your life and doing big things. Be proud!!
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Day 481 clean and sober today. Getting ready to go to work. Have an amazing day everyone, love you guys! 
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If you believe your withdrawal symptoms are manageable and are able to continue drinking fluids and possibly taking soup broth or other nutrition, I wouldn’t recommend drinking any more alcohol at this point. You’ve already started the process and you will just have to get through it, and you will. It is really more advisable if you’re concerned about your condition to see a doctor who can help you with medications. Bottom line I don’t recommend drinking more.
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When someone is struggling with keeping the drink down and not making changes it’s a common theme to say, well if you keep doing the same things you will get the same results. That is a very true statement.
It can also be applied to sobriety. I keep doing the same things that got me sober (AA, therapy, life style changes) and as a result I keep staying sober.
Day 1434.
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Gotta go through it, amigo. I know the hell very well. It just takes time. Try taking baths/showers, a wet wash cloth on your face and neck, I would stay in bed and try to watch something to distract myself, listen to meditations and do breathing exercises and I would even use mantras and repeat over and over “I can do this I can do this,” or “booze sucks ass booze sucks ass” lol. You WILL come out the other side and feel better soon.
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Whoa!
Picturesque… what a beautiful capture.
Congrats on your recovery.
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Yes it will be better. Hang in there, amigo. Glad you’re getting some distraction. I’m proud of you for sticking through it and taking the necessary steps to be sober.
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Checking in…
Substance free 647 days
Sugar free 4 days
Life is great!!!
My mood has been questionable. My body has been hurting like hell. I have been self isolating, not answering my phone, avoiding text messages, only going to my home group…
Although all this behavior could be red flags for a rocky recovery I am feeling very strong in that regard. My substance recovery that is…
I can feel walls starting to slowly build up around me, even here. Where I had once starting to feel that I was opening up quite a bit, I am now starting to clam up everywhere. I am trying not to judge my behavior just to notice it and accept it as part of my intelligence making a choice. Learning that not everyone in the world is worthy of my story and to know the most tender parts of me. Being a part of this book study with all of these women may have started this inside me. I have never had intimate relationships like this with women. Trusting women is not a strong suit of mine, trusting anyone for that matter.
As I walk into this part of my recovery it feels different, there was a shift that happened a couple of weeks ago when I became that “non-drinker” that people talk about. That took a long time for me 21 months but I can definitely feel it inside me. It’s as obvious a feeling as when the obsession was lifted. Now that the booze and drugs have been taken away from the equation I can see my life more clearly. I am able to look at some difficult things through sober eyes and address them. I am also able to look at all the beautiful things in life through sober eyes and admire them, be grateful for them.
So that is where I am at, just rolling with the punches. My ED is crap. I am trying not to look too far in the future, we are coming into a very busy time of year. Family gatherings and gatherings around food bring up a lot of anxiety in me. I am just keeping my eyes on today and living ODAAT.
Congrats on your recovery everyone, super happy to be on this journey with you.
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Heading into day 7. Couldn’t sleep, up all night drawing. Started this it’s not finished. Excited my baby girls come home today. Much love
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Day 48.
10…
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…1293. I have fired, in the last 30, the same amount of people I did all last year. Around here the labor force has become pretty weak. Need 1 person…hire 5. Need 2 people to run a shift schedule 4.
Times like this would be loaded with drinking, anger, paranoia…now…work, do what I can and go home to my love.
Sobriery never promises a life without a storm…it promises finding peace within the storm.
Stay sober friends!
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@Wakikki I’m sorry about all of your pains and tiredness, maybe see your doctor. Congrats on 60 days
@Its_me_Stella sorry you had trouble too but I’m glad I’m not the only one, I will follow the advice you were given as it definitely feels like nerve pain, thank you 
Ah, I didn’t even think about Fibro but it does effect how we feel pain so would make sense. Congrats on being able to see more clearly, the difficult and the beautiful With you on the ED stuff, solidarity.
@anon27760155 I’m sorry about all the worry, hopefully you will get some answers next week 
please hold tight, you can get through this.
@Dragonflygirl82 congrats on 600 days love those words 
@ShadowFax congrats on double digits and for recognising that addict voice trying to trick you
@Mno sending strength you’re doing the work and I echo what Olivia said. Proud of you 
@Charlie_C have fun at the pool with David 
422 days no alcohol.
390 days no cocaine.
28 days no binge-eating.
I have managed to leave my flat three times today. Once to walk to buy perfume, a card, and some confectionary for my step mum’s birthday next week, then a drive to my hometown to collect my repeat medications, then another walk because my car alerted me that the battery was 0% in my key remote. It feels good when I do things that need to be done, I just wish I didn’t have extreme anxiety whilst doing everything, and now of course I am in a lot of pain from doing it all.
I haven’t heard from the private hospital about the treatment for my feet yet, the receptionist said I should hear from the department ‘within a few days’, it has been 10 days now, so I think tomorrow I will give them a call to check on my referral.
Starting to get Xmas anxiety. I’d really like to spend it alone. Family stuff always leaves me feeling worthless and inadequate and that makes me sad because I love my family, I don’t know why being around them makes me feel so low. Then I guess being around people in general makes me feel like this too, I have intense memories and flashbacks of feeling like everyone hated me in primary school, and when I wasn’t held back inside as punishment during break times, I’d go round the side of the school where I couldn’t be seen, and I’d punch and scrape my knuckles against the brick walls until they bled. I guess it just sucks extra because I hope to feel good around my family so it’s more upsetting when I don’t.
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