@Its_me_Stella @Fargesia @Lorelai thanks so much!
@LeeHawk Yes!Thank goodness I’m past that stage. I actually gained 20 pounds in the first 3 months!… I think that’s like unheard of! Food was oddly the only thing that made me feel better. Luckily I’ve chilled out on the weight gain in the last month 
oh well…
10 Likes
Nope I did too.
2 Likes
Oh wow!!! Congratulations!!!
1 Like
Thanks Dana
1 Like
Just checking in on day 25. The kids have been making such a fuss over me for Mother’s Day. It’s been mainly lovely, but when it came to preparing dinner they were both doing things differently to how I was going to, or just being unnecessarily messy and I got a bit wound up. I had to backtrack quite a bit and just accept that mess was inevitable, and that it didn’t really matter how the cucumbers were cut, they would still taste the same. It’s that controlling aspect of myself that I think was one of the things I coped with by being drunk.
I’m relaxing now with a cup of tea in my new “Just another manic Mum-day” mug.
22 Likes
Checking in
Day41
Day is going well… other than this constant nagging resentment towards my friend (the one where I feel the relationship is very 1 sided). We “tried” chatting yesterday… well she messaged yesterday for some support. I don’t mind listening and helping… that’s the kind of person I am. She says thanks for the support and that I’m a good friend. Tells me that she has a counselling appt for this issue and then I reply about how I can relate and that we just need to be easier on ourselves. She just disappears. Goes on n off fb messenger (I end up seeing this bcuz it pops up next to her msg everytime I access messenger to talk to my mom or supports back home). She has seen my msg, and hasn’t replied in like a day or so. I don’t have it in me to chat about this when she’s already apparently overwhelmed with what’s going on and I’m abit too annoyed to be honest to be opening my mouth right now. So im just going to distance myself a bit. The only time I ever hear from her is when she wants help. I dont mind helping but I feel more like a counsellor than a friend to be honest 
She never used to be this way so idk. I honestly feel like I’m a youth or teenager learning about friendships haha I’ve had many friends but none that were sort of healthy I guess ud say. She’s the healthiest friend I’ve had, no drinking or drugs, into health and fitness, a career, a family. Very diff lol initally I was going to pull a passive aggressive approach and delete her off fb lol… then I was thinking to myself… “how old are we?! Lol”. Like I’m finding I’m so “young” when it comes to stuff that I feel like I should already know by 37. Everything is twisted… the stuff I do know, is the stuff I shouldn’t know… and the stuff i don’t know, is what I should know. Idk 
16 Likes
Congratulations Sarah 
beautiful mom 
1 Like
Checking in on day 43. Sober.
Made it through yesterday sober!
ODAAT!
21 Likes
Congratulations 
wonderful news!!!
2 Likes
Day 164, wish I could say it was all rainbows. I’ll say my gratitudes over and over till I’m blue in the face. And then fall right back to being ungrateful. I slept the last two days even with my girls here I got up to cook them food and bath and snacks but for the most part I snoozed in my chair while they colored and stuff which I felt like shit for I’ve had a terrible cough and can feel the cold, I feel a little better today, but idk I just hate myself know idea who I am. Know idea if I’m on the right path . Trying to tell myself I am better, I’m not out chasing the drugs, getting dwis, or trying to kill myself but idk ttyl
24 Likes
Day 129
Just checking in. Have a great Sunday all!
18 Likes
Yay!! Congratulations! Life always goes on and this time we’re sober to enjoy the ride 
In my experience, some days (weeks, months, years) are harder than others. You are showing up for your self and your girls. I count that as a win.
8 Likes
Hey guys… just checking in day 14.
Missed yesterday checkin as I was really busy and tired.
I had a relapse dream while resting in the day today. It was really scary and also confusing when I woke up, I did not know if I relapse or not. That dream felt real and upon realising it was just a dream, I was really relieved.
Have a good day guys. Love you
21 Likes
I had a much better sleep last night. Actually felt motivated to do a spin workout of my own this morning which I haven’t done in the last 2 weeks. Yesterday was an absolutely horrible day though. Really I shouldn’t say that because so many people’s days were probably worse than mine, but I just hated who I was yesterday. I was so sleep deprived and irritable and I’m not usually like that. I’m usually patient and kind and yesterday I was just ugly and grumpy. Sometimes I’m too patients though because everybody has moods like that and I should just forgive myself. It was kind of funny because my daughter said Mom “I know you’re really tired, but it doesn’t mean you have to talk like that”. Pretty sure she was reciting exactly what I’ve said to her many times before, but at least she handled it well! She has such good communication skills. She could have just snapped back at me but she didn’t, so I must be doing something right 
Anyway I guess the thing is, I was also feeling a bit depressed and even though I got a better sleep I’m still feeling a bit depressed today. I guess it will take a while to catch up on the sleep that I’ve missed but I’m usually a really motivated person and excited to start my day and this lack of sleep is interfering with anything else that I want to do. I’m trying not to have too many expectations but I feel like I have been putting off so many things that need to be done. Maybe I should just get up and start doing them and I’d probably feel better…??? It’s hard to know sometimes if you should just give in and relax or if you should just get up and get moving.
Anyways, my husband and I came up with a different system with the kitten and it seemed to work so just a few more nights of me getting a better sleep and I should feel back on track. I hope everyone else is having a great Sunday
17 Likes
Day 12.5
Had a weird panic attack last night while cooking dinner. Suddenly felt like I was gonna faint so I laid down around 7 but didn’t fall asleep for hours. And had a nightmare that I was drunk again. But I feel better today! I think I’m gonna try and organize/pack my letter writing and journaling stuff for the move next month. Nothing else to report!
Have a good Sunday evening yall! 
21 Likes
Day 16
My Girlfriend made me Vanilla pudding. She knows I really like pudding lately. To be honest it was culminating moment that gave me a lot of confidence and satisfaction of being sober. I had some addict brainwash thoughts since friday begun, and this moment was where this all slugish and brain fogish doubts melted into this pure very VIVID sober Expirience!
29 Likes
Thank you, that is so kind of you to say 
Thanks sassy. I’m trying to tell myself the same. Much love
1 Like