I have struggled most of my life with negative thoughts about my body image, doing ‘body’ checking like pinching yourself, staring at the mirror from multiple angles. I 100% get your frustration. You and I often talk about the Swimming pool on another thread being a huge part of that ‘SELF LOVE’. Love and Acceptance of self is a day to day thing. Being Sober definitely helps across the board. When i find myself doing those behaviors i use Cognitive behavior therapy techniques, like focusing on others, quickly pivoting to a favorite song, taking a walk, and doing simple things like just smiling. We often tell ourselves things we would never tell another person. Moving can be very stressful, hopefully you’ll be done soon!
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Hey!
My 6 month old little lady woke us up every 2-2.5 hrs last night — she’s still adjusting to waking up tired in the crib, looking for us.
Taking a few minutes away from getting ready for a work meeting at the moment. Getting up in the dark for work, and powering through the day is so much more bearable because of my healthy decisions yesterday. No ‘need’ to complain or procrastinate here. It’s a good feeling.
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Day 76
Just checking in.
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@mindofsobermike How are you doing Mike? Just thinking of you and hope you are taking care of yourself and finding your way back to recovery. You have what it takes to get back on track – we are forever in your corner 
@starlight14 What a lovely reminder for yourself. I do hope reading this helps you keep the undeserving blame away from yourself. 
@maestro how did your day go? Anxiety feeling any better?
@happyfeet Awe – thank you dear friend 
@sobermedic lovely to see you thriving with 144 days! Yeah to new adventures ahead!
@mno I am so sorry for your stressful day. A lot of emotions flying around and very sorry for the loss of your dear friend. I second #fuckaddiction. Hearing that you can be an outcast for not participating in life damaging activity is horseshit. I know it was rough for us growing up but I feel like the youth of today is dealing with this stigma on a regular basis and from many fronts. I appreciate your posts and your openness. I do hope your day got easier for you
OH YES! This would be lovely – I love your work and think others would benefit from experiencing it too. Glad you are feeling better each day. Best of luck for your daughter in her competition. Just saw your update – YEAH to 3rd place! That is fantastice 
Wow – this is a lovely next step and we are here for you love. You have done what you have set your mind to thus far. Flex those sober muscles and roll up the sleeves – you are stronger than your addictions. We got your back!
@1in8billion miss seeing you my friend – hope you are well 
@butterflymoonwoman Hope your appointment went well and you are able to enjoy the rest of your day
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Thank u! And thank u also @JazzyS
Im waiting now for my appt to begin. Nervous but i think ill be okay 
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Day 1033,
Called my mother because she called me yesterday while I was at my sponsor. Shouldn’t have done it, my resentment is still to big. She also right away reacts to things I say, I just want her to f@cking listen. She started explaining that’s what people do ugh. Yeah in my f@caked up family they do. So I said things I regret having said, like that it is a life or death situation just a stupid drunk remark that was. Gonna hit my bed early, it draws my energy. I know they have the best intentions but it just doesn’t seem to work. I never have felt understood, read stuff again on adhd. I check all the boxes about stories when it stays untreated, tomorrow is a new day hopefully.
Edit: I called up to make excuses and right away the same happened 
. Now trying to laugh about it.
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20.5
9.5 
LOL this is exactly how I feel right now. I feel good and funny and there is this thing with… well you know ‘‘The Doors’’ 
(eyeroll) well obviously… and all that (Slow scarry music playing), mysterious mist going on, lightnings going on…
Hey LISTEN!!! - trying to be evil here 
LOL
from 0:43
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Second check in
I’m in my bed with a hot water bottle on my lap and a book near me. I showered, I cooked and now I’ll relax.
I now know the term for that restless feeling I have when detoxing from social media: it’s called fomo (fear of missing out).
The thought of going to my computer crossed my mind, but what benefit will I get? I’ll stay up too late again and hate myself for that tomorrow morning.
If I want to sleep more and better I must implement a better evening routine.
I was able to go to bed around 9 pm the last 2 nights. Same goal today.
But now: reading 
Good night 
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444 days🩵.
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Day 47 AF
Latenight checkin.
Goddamn I worked.
I am a painter, handyman (woman),
I am everything lol…
So fucking done!
And I am sober
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Thank you for asking @JazzyS
Threw myself into my work today, and hit the gym for an hour afterwards. Feeling a bit better now.
Absolutely need to sleep better tonight 
Hope you’re doing alright too.
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Hi @Mindofsobermike i just wanted to check how you are today. Wishing you well, please let us know how you are getting on when you feel ready. 
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You accomplished something and you should be super proud of that. I never went to any of my ceremonies but did make a point to take myself out for a celebration.
You really are not missing out on anything and can show yourself a better celebration!
Congrats by the way - not sure ive said that yet. It is a huge stepping stone. 
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@rob11 I’m sorry that your conversation with mom didn’t go well. I do hope you get some sleep and have a much better day tomorrow. How is your sponsor working out for you? Is he starting to incorporate PTSD with your steps? Sending you peace my friend
@andrea4 Hell yeah 444 is amazing stuff – keep it up :muscle
@juli1 Fuck yeah 47 days – painter / handywoman / rockstar – just all around badass chick! I love seeing you thrive in sobriety
@maestro glad to hear it – hoping for a blissful sleep tonight 
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Hey guys checking in. It’s been a long day. Off work tomorrow, going to the Orthopedic to see if hes gonna cast my wrist because of a tendon tear that’s not really healing. Right now I just have a brace and don’t really want a cast cause I’ll have to miss a few weeks of work, and because they suck. Back to IOP tomorrow night. Not sure how many more weeks I have, was supposed to be 12 but she said they can recommend longer if they think you need it. I guess it doesn’t matter though, I’ll just do whatever they say. Looking forward to getting out of work and sleeping in tomorrow Hopefully. Have a great rest of the day peeps. 
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Sober day 13.
Last full day in the mountains. It’s been so nice to have a little break from normal routine. The cabin has an amazing screened porch that I’m currently enjoying. Wish I could afford to stay longer.
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Day 9. I am starting to have more struggles.
Today they told me. They flag a post I put in the section of memes. I am so sorry. I never thought I could offend someone
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Hey ya’ll,
Feeling much better today. So glad I was able to be on here a bunch yesterday when i was not feeling great. Think it helped.
Get to have a girls weekend this weekend with my bestie, and I am so excited for that. I need it. The DAs office (it is not called this in my country) called today to let my family know what to expect going forward. Bunch of atuff I knew was coming, and I have to breath and rely on this and you guys. I do not know how I am going to survive the trial, I do not know how I will feel if he is not convicted of 1st degree, though we now know a tactic of rhe defense which the goal is to reduce to manslaughter. I just find it all very stupid and have to prepare myself; somehow for what is goinf to happen and how it is out my control. It is very dofficult. In my country the family cannot even hire a lawyer, if one could even afford it, to defend; who defends is the state. And that is hard in itself. Anyway what I was saying was dealing with all this stuff, and getting the air sucked out…its like, this road is long and it takes stamina. It takes something more then strength, and I am seeking it. The little slogan today on the site was about forgiveness, and I do notbknow about all that but I must find a way to acceptance. Acceptance while fighting is difficult.
I so love my home, family and my life. I heard from the daycare and just have to send my resume, so we shall see what happens there. I just want to do something different, at least for a time. And I sure love little kids and respect the work of those who care for them.
.wishing everyone a beautiful night. So glad to be sober and glad you are all here. Xo…
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Hang in there. Dont worry about offending, generally its not meant and I think we all get flagged one time or another. Xo.
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ELEVEN DAYS!!! WOOT WOOT!!! Always so happy to read your updates, all these numbers going up for you though I know weed has been the last one givinf you a challenge. We’re right here with you and always super happy to see this. Keep it going & reach out first if yiu get any feelings under your skin. I also like playing the tape to the end if I get a craving like hm. What happens after…?? Oh yeh. It sucks balls!!! So proud of you keep going
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