Checking in sober on this sunny Sunday 
about to hit the tredmill and listen to some tunes. Going to go buy a new fitbit versa later as a gift to myself 
might work on a painting of a tree later as well. I miss doing art, its meditative and fun 
Have a lovely day all 
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I like this. Exploration and new experiences are some of the most fun things to experience alone, for me. There is no pressure for your opinions on the experience to be compatible with anyone else, you can be unrestrained in your enjoyment or boredom or uncertainty. I get to form opinions on it that are completely my own. That in turn also helps me learn about myself. I’m also too concerned with what’s around me at the moment than the fact I’m by myself, or quite all the thoughts in my head. I also like going to the library and sitting at the dog park. Solitary activities, but still part of the larger world instead of completely isolated.
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Day 215. Meal prep and dog walks. Maybe a little gaming. Otherwise chill day.
Have a strong day!!!
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Be happy that you have your EMOTIONS back. I used to feel nothing, remind yourself whenever you cry that you’re feeling-something you lived so long without
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Day 20, feeling good for the most part. A lil blehh today, brain is very foggy and almost kind of like sore, it’s not a headache feeling. Feeling a lil unmotivated myself today, but gotta get up and start doing something.
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18 days and 19 hours,long day traveling,I find it hard when my kids are negative,was very tired today,…had a lot of thoughts about picking up tonight,played back day 1 2 3 and the previous day’s before that,told my thoughts that I wouldn’t just drink tonight if I did,I’d drink tomorrow and the day after and the day after that etc,I have a dreams of a positive future doing things and studying things and I feel that that life won’t happen if alcohol is involved.
Got some food and quickly have tucked myself in bed,. almost 19 days sober 
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Well done, that’s some great powerful, wise choices. Your doing amazing keep up the good work.
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Thank you for those words,…I’m taking in that statement…yes I guess wise choices for sure 
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My friend and me had a nice day out together. That in itself was good for our relationship I think.Didn’t talk difficult stuff. We will have more difficult and uncomfortable conversations in the future I am sure. I need to have a long hard look at myself too. What I want myself. Because I don’t really know. Well, I don’t want to lose her. I know that. Thanks for the input Cristel.
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Glad you had a nice time together even if you didn’t get into the hard stuff. Sounds like that’s a very special friend you have there. Knowing what you don’t want is a step towards figuring out what you DO want. Relationships can be so confusing and complicated! I’d suggest taking this all one day at a time as well. Just like we do our sobriety. Wishing you all the best in this @Mno.
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You hope therapy helps you in caring about your sobriety. So you actually already do care Beth. And I care too btw. I just know you need to be sober to get ahead in life. Drinking will only lead you down a road you don’t want to go to a place you don’t want to be. Even though life is still bloody hard sober it’s the only way to live for people like us. If we want to have a chance at living life we need to be sober. I am absolutely 100% of that. Hugs. PS. Not that long a post at all. Keep ';m coming.
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Day 5 sober. A more rested day, I went to the Church and I really relaxed. Starting a new week with hope
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Thank you
Yeah, I think I get to a point where I don’t care enough about my future or even life. After so many years of attempting sobriety, I know the precursors, and they are here! The difference is, that for the first time in over 35 years, I’m being honest and sharing about it.
I’ve purposely not checked in on perceived landmark days because I don’t want to be congratulated on shit I’ve done so many times.
So yeah, I guess therapy to understand I’m worth sobriety and good things. I love me some self sabotage.
Thank you so much for your response. It really does mean so very much to me!!
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Day 499. Not much to report!
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Day 34.75
I’ve been extremely busy (and tired since Friday). I’ve been doing a 9 day cycling challenge starting last Saturday (2/15) through to today (2/23). It required daily challenges of 1+ hours on the trainer with 2-3 hour sessions on weekend days. By Friday, the 1 hour session on Friday night put me down after a long week (hence no check-in). Yesterday, Saturday was a 2 hour session that added insult to injury from Friday and the week before. Then chores, early dinner, and no check-in. Today was 3 hours of punishing fun that concluded the 9 day challenge. All total I raised $750 dollars for Parkinson’s research.
Now I am trying to finish making my chili to take for lunches this week and make a shrimp pasta for dinner tonight. The chili is in the slow cooker; only thing left is adding the beans 15 minutes away from done.
I have not been checking in for a couple of days, so I missed about 250 posts (which is amazing).
Hopefully everyone had a good weekend and are ready for the work week!!!
Stay sober!!!
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I also want instant ‘new me’. I also struggle to grasp that ‘new me’ will at its core still be ‘old me’, just with some fairly superficial lifestyle changes. If it is possible to change core self, it will be very gradual indeed.
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Day 20 without alcohol. Got taxes done and went to the park (it was 46 degrees and sunny; unusually warm in Minnesota.). I have had some thoughts to drink a few times over the weekend but they aren’t as strong and I can logically talk myself out of it.
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