Just a quick check-in 
Emotions are going everywhere but I am pretty good today! @Butterflymoonwoman I downloaded the app you shared a couple days ago and this is really helpful in giving those emotions words! Thank you for sharing.
Iām sorry Iām not really actively writing here atm but I read all your messages in this thread daily 
I wish you all strength and an awesome day.
Checking in on day 307
Another day off from work today . Taking it pretty easy here with my youngest here with me. She convinced me she shouldnāt have to go to school on her birthday lol. Weāve been hanging out and watching a few episodes of Wednesday. When everyone else gets home we will be having some dinner and cupcakes and do some pumpkin carving after dinner. Then watch the Jays game of course. Keeping it simple tonight since she had her party on Sunday. The chest congestion from my cold is finally breaking up so Iāll probably try to get a power walk on the treadmill in shortly . Hope
Everyone is having a good day. Stay safe and sober everyone
Very true. Itās funny you say that because I was watching a movie yesterday on a free app and they showed an ad for THC legal gummies. Now with all the delta 8, THCA, etc and for a brief moment my little brain was like hey gummies and I had to shut it down and say hey NO! Because like you said, id be back to day 1. I still have my medical card. It doesnāt expire until February. I let my recommendation lapse because the expense was stressing me out and it was starting to feel like a crutch! I had told myself that if I could obtain it legally, it was ok and I did that for 4 years and realized that I was not OK, not for me so I decided not to renew my recommendation. The first thing I noticed is that Iām less anxious when I was taking it for anxiety in the first place. So yea, nicotine was easy for me, the desire for it left with desire to drink. Iāve been nicotine free for 4 1/2 years and 6 1/2 year AF Itās definitely a work in progress and I have to stay diligent in my recovery daily.
Keep your goals moving forward
You can stay THC free. Itās a very tricky thing though very much
When it comes to quitting THC, keep your goals in mind
I will! Thanks for the advice! I appreciate it 
Day 10.
My dad blacked out and fell down yesterday night. Cardiologist ran some tests and found nothing. He has been having low blood pressure issues this year and just had a major back surgery about 2 weeks ago. He works out most days (pre-surgery), but has a tall martini (or two) most nights, although I believe (hope) he has had the good sense to stay away from that while recovering from his surgery. He is 66 and I am beginning to get this bad feeling that he wonāt live to see 70. It is tough sometimes to try encouraging loved ones to make good/healthy choices while also respecting their independence.
Otherwise, I am spending some time today defining my goals for the next 6 and 12 months, and charting a path to progressing in those goals. I am taking the advice of people in this chat seriously when they warn against being overly ambitious during alcohol recovery, but I am also trying to design an escape plan from my current career to find out what is/isnāt feasible for me. My goal is to try generating some passive income sources to supplement a hypothetical different, lower-paying job. Iāve got to get out of this eventually, somehow, or Iām in for a lifetime of misery.
Warmest Regards Everyone,
Brent
Checking in on day 73.
Today I remembered the day that happened 73 days ago. And the weeks/months before.
Slowly I feel more and more like sobriety is showing/teaching me different aspects and lessons of it. Physical I feel more calm. My intestines feel calmer. No more heartburn.
Mentally life is what it is. Ups and downs. Work sucks sometimes, life sucks sometimes.
But sober I can somehow manage.
What helps me on a daily basis is the ODAAT saying. It breaks life down to managable pieces.
Have a great sober wednsday!
Checking in on day
903 no alcohol
412 no form of marijuana
543 nic free
Damn I was sleepy
I napped for 2hours30min and woke up drained
Very cloudy day here and rain later tonight or tomorrow morning and that doesnāt help
Iām going for a walk to wake me up
Be back in a bit 
End of workday. Only have 1 minute here. I am going to skip the Jays game tonight - itās been taking too much time away from housework and Halloween prep this week!
I have reached out to my dad to see if he wants to be my sober accountability buddy. Iām going to send him messages in the afternoon/evening/bed time. Iām sure he will be down for this, since he lives across the country and always loves to hear from me.
As much as I appreciate checking in on here, I need someone other than my wife who knows me personally, who I have a vested interested in keeping proud of me, and keeping me on track.
Take care of yourself!
PM Check in: woke up this morning in an immense amount of pain which didnāt help my mental health. started praying right away because i knew i still had a long day ahead of me. the gym, 4 hr shift (unfortunately still have to work pt even though iām disabled until i get my SSDI), family dinner, plus life in general. i will say this: God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit carried me through today all day and is helping me now and i can rely upon Them to not stop helping me always
focusing on:
in a perfect world i would have (probably should have) just stayed in bedā¦ maybe when i get my benefits iāll be able to rest like i shouldā¦ still recovering from pneumonia and infections from this summerā¦ just a lot to try to cope with along with all the mental health stuff, which, by itself, is extremely burdensome. makes me really work a solid program though, so thereās that. i shine for Him.
have you considered sponsorship? itās nice to have someone who wonāt just co-sign my bs you know?
@Noshame naps like that suck, i pray beforehand and that fixes the issue. might be worth a shot.
@Jonachav123 ODAAT is vital for me too i like what you shared there, thanks for that
@CanadianGirl power-walking is cool, something else to try is weighted carries. you put on a backpack with heavy stuff in it or carry something heavy switching sides every minute or two while walking, that can be a lot of fun
Morning everyone, checking in 
1310 days alcohol free
24 days THC free
4 days binge free
I think my biggest struggle right now is with food. So Iām tackling this unhealthy relationship the same way I do with my relationships with substances that donāt serve me. Itās helping. I had a pretty rough day yesterday, with my chronic pain thing going on with my hip and the compounded effect of no sleep. But I finally had a full night sleep last night and Iām hoping I might feel a little bit more like myself now Iāve slept. My brain is very noisy right now, full of criticism of not doing enough. Food noise, parent guilt, work anxiety, not being fun enough, feeling sorry for myself because of my injury and not being able to go to the office right now. Iām just going to try my best to be a bit nicer to myself. Iām trying my best, Iām only human. My brain is just such a jerk.
Anywho, have a lovely day everyone.
OOOOOOOooooOOOOā¦ now thatās some math that I love 
Checking in on a beautifully chilly evening here in the midwest. Started back with my HIIT routine on top of my yoga today. It felt so good. Today is the anniversary of my dad and I STAYED SOBERā¦ last year I was a mess. I am sure if I dig on here I can find it. Luckily I have come a long way since then. @Noshame did a post to figure out all the days accumulated deducting slips. I think I might do that, so thank you. Now off for some music time. Because why not! I wouldnāt be here without it. That has never been a doubt in my mindā¦ If someone told me I could never write, produce, photograph, or listen to music again I would literally cease to exist. Light and love all
Couple more days until 1 Year!!! Have the night to myself, found my weighted blanket and wrapped up in bed with a movie 
626
This month and the past 6 Octoberās I have joined a walking challenge to help raise much needed funds for a local Mental Health Institute. This year I have again exceeded my goals in both kms walked and funds raised.
A total of $457 raised
Day 22 AF
I woke up at 6 AM and first took my dog out of the cage and to the toilet. Then I drank 500 ml of fresh water to fuel my body. I have carrot juice in the freezer waiting to thaw, and after I drink it, I will take my dog for a 45-minute walk.
I attended a physical meeting yesterday and it was very nice. Today, I also have a physical AA meeting in the evening, and I plan to attend.
I need to look for some projects today because Iāve been out of work during these 22 days, and all my money was spent during my last relapse. But Iām not sadāIām focusing on my sobriety as my top priority, because it is making my life better.
Hope you are all doing well.
Happy sober day, and ODAAT.
Day 107
Even over 3 months later, learning more about myself all over again. Trying to find the right balance of eating and activity. I had been so used to binge eating along with binge drinking. And snacking all the time. What an odd problem to have, but Iām thankful for trying to treat myself right after years of not. Drinking would keep me wired until all hours until blackout/pass out. Since stopping multiple times over the last year and this current (and longest) stretch, Iāve had to come to terms that the former wasnāt good or normal and feeling tired after being awake for 14 hours actually is. Maybe Iām alone in this mundane discovery, haha.
Thankful to read everyoneās journaling on this shared road weāre all on.
@noshame I hear ya ā the cigs were super hard to give up. This is why for me I had to do them first or I would not be able to get out of the cycle of addiction. Grateful you are here and doing so well in your sobriety. Sorry to hear of all the lives lost to addiction 
@McDude YEAH double digits! That is wonderful to see. Sorry to hear about your dad. Hope he is ok and will use this incident to start taking better care of himself. It is hard to see loved ones not taking care of themselves and not being able to help them. 
Good to see you making plans and working on passive income but also remembering to take it slow and keep your recovery at the forefront of everything
@PositiveThoughts Oh I love getting into the Halloween spirit. Have fun with the prep. What is your daughter going to be this year? I love that you will have an in life accountability buddyā¦ smart to have someone in real life who knows you and wishes you well. Keep up the amazing work
@jvke So very sorry that you woke up with such pain and had to deal with a full day ahead. So grateful that you did make it through. I read something the other day that stuck with me ā when you are down and only capable of 30% and then you give your 30% that means you have indeed given 100%. I know how hard it is to move and focus when you are in such pain. Please be proud of yourself for all that you accomplished today. Sending hugs my friend I do hope tomorrow is a easier day for you
Much love friend. Hope you are able to accomplish the task of being nicer to yourself Our brains really can be such jerks! Hope you do get some sleep tonight
@cr84 So proud of you love. Glad you made it through sober.
@seb Way to go Sebastian ā that is impressive work! Glad you were able to raise such funds
Checking in on Wednesday night
1043 days free of alcohol and weed
1458 days free of cigarettes
Long day and Iām hoping to fall asleep soon
Wishing everyone a wonderful addiction free day / evening - sending you all so much love
Late night check in. 3 months and 27 days. Had a great night with my oldest daughter (sheās 11) tomorrow is throw back Thursday, and sheās going as a 90ās raver. Canāt imagine where she got the idea from lol, so much nostalgia for me and her aunt who joined us in the hair dying and candy jewelry making, through video chat. What sucked though, is seeing her show off the bracelets she made, and seeing the marks on her wristā¦. Thatās going to have to be addressed tomorrow, at therapy. Kids struggling, and I know that struggle. Love her so much, and hate that sheās getting into that headspace, but 100% understand cuz I went through it too.
Anyways. Lifeās been a bit chaotic. With kids, their own issues, psych and medical, spent a good portion of today in the ER with my oldest. Just keep moving forward and be as present as I can be with them. Thank God I am sober. So grateful for that. Tackling this as a drunk, wouldāve been a nightmare for everyone.
New job is going well. Making huge progress with this client! Itās so exciting to watch them grow. Definitely think this is my calling. Even contemplating going back to school so I can further this career.
Goodnight and happy sober day!!!
I canāt imagine how happy your kids are about you being sober! Keep going and be as very proud as you should be for staying cleanāš»
