# Chuck Norris jokes
**URL:** https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875
**Category:** Just for Fun
**Created:** [November 4, 2018, 4:32pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875 "2018-11-04T16:32:40Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@HappyDays](https://talkingsober.com/u/HappyDays)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 4:32pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/1 "2018-11-04T16:32:40Z")
Feel free to share them here
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### Author:  [@Yoda-Stevie](https://talkingsober.com/u/Yoda-Stevie)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 4:56pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/2 "2018-11-04T16:56:15Z")
Chuck Norris got pulled over by a cop.
He let the cop off with a warning.
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### Author:  [@Yoda-Stevie](https://talkingsober.com/u/Yoda-Stevie)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 4:57pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/3 "2018-11-04T16:57:46Z")
Chuck Norris and Superman agreed to a fight.
The loser had to wear is underwear on top of his pants.
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### Author:  [@Yoda-Stevie](https://talkingsober.com/u/Yoda-Stevie)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 4:58pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/4 "2018-11-04T16:58:48Z")
Discovery Channel has a week dedicated to Sharks.
Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
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### Author:  [@Yoda-Stevie](https://talkingsober.com/u/Yoda-Stevie)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 4:59pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/5 "2018-11-04T16:59:17Z")
The Boogieman checks under his bed for Chuck Norris.
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### Author:  [@Yoda-Stevie](https://talkingsober.com/u/Yoda-Stevie)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 5:04pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/9 "2018-11-04T17:04:15Z")
Chuck Norris counted to infinity…twice.
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### Author:  [@Zara](https://talkingsober.com/u/Zara)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 5:05pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/10 "2018-11-04T17:05:41Z")
OMG I love Chuck Norris jokes! They have me crying with laughter!
Chuck Norris once strangled someone with a cordless phone.
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### Author:  [@HappyDays](https://talkingsober.com/u/HappyDays)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 5:07pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/11 "2018-11-04T17:07:04Z")
They once made a “Chuck Norris” brand toilet paper, but it wouldn’t take shit from anybody
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### Author:  [@HappyDays](https://talkingsober.com/u/HappyDays)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 5:09pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/13 "2018-11-04T17:09:39Z")
Love this one lol
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### Author:  [@Yoda-Stevie](https://talkingsober.com/u/Yoda-Stevie)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 5:10pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/15 "2018-11-04T17:10:28Z")
If playing Scrabble, you spell “Chuck Norris” you win that game and every other game, forever.
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### Author:  [@HappyDays](https://talkingsober.com/u/HappyDays)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 5:12pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/18 "2018-11-04T17:12:03Z")
Just laughing my butt off lol 😁
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### Author:  [@Yoda-Stevie](https://talkingsober.com/u/Yoda-Stevie)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 5:12pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/19 "2018-11-04T17:12:16Z")
I was once attempting the “Norris Rule” in Scrabble, but only had the letters for “Charles Norris”. I played them anyways.
A foot came through the board and kicked me in the face.
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### Author:  [@HoofHearted](https://talkingsober.com/u/HoofHearted)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 9:35pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/23 "2018-11-04T21:35:22Z")
Chuck Norris **can** divide by zero.
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### Author:  [@JUSTINo](https://talkingsober.com/u/JUSTINo)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 9:52pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/24 "2018-11-04T21:52:22Z")
Chuck Norris can bake a cake…In the freezer!
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### Author:  [@JUSTINo](https://talkingsober.com/u/JUSTINo)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 9:52pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/25 "2018-11-04T21:52:41Z")
These are hilarious you guys 😂😂😂
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### Author:  [@LNM](https://talkingsober.com/u/LNM)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 9:54pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/26 "2018-11-04T21:54:18Z")
Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can’t get up the courage to tell him.
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### Author:  [@DungeonMaster](https://talkingsober.com/u/DungeonMaster)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 10:28pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/27 "2018-11-04T22:28:32Z")
When Chuck Norris does a push up, he’s not pushing himself up, he’s pushing the world down.
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### Author:  [@Wunderbar](https://talkingsober.com/u/Wunderbar)
#### Post date: [November 4, 2018, 11:36pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/29 "2018-11-04T23:36:35Z")
A few years ago, Chuck Norris saw a stranded 18 wheeler on the side of the road out of fuel. Chuck proceeded to pee in the fuel tank, thus creating Optimus Prime
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### Author:  [@DungeonMaster](https://talkingsober.com/u/DungeonMaster)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2018, 12:16am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/31 "2018-11-05T00:16:30Z")
Chuck Norris heard that nothing could kill him, so he tracked nothing down and killed it first.
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### Author:  [@anon46927530](https://talkingsober.com/u/anon46927530)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2018, 12:21am UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/chuck-norris-jokes/46875/32 "2018-11-05T00:21:55Z")
God created the Heavens and Earth, Chuck Norris patted God on the back and said it was good.
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