Counting down to my big 90!

Hey everyone! I’m new here. Stumbled upon this app after one of my good recovery friends told me about it.

I currently relapsed last year around Thanksgiving of '19. This run was awful. I couldn’t stop. I almost had 1 whole year clean and then i got triggered. Having so much money from being successful and sober, having a great job, I thought…hmmm. One time won’t hurt me right?? Just to feel that release again. Relax and drift away from reality. Wrong. That’s all it took to make me a monster again. It’s amazing how that one time can take everything away from you. I lost all the trust I built up in everyone. I took from innocent people and hurt them by doing so. People who didn’t deserve that.

Here i am now. Counting down to my big 90 days! :grin:
At first I was so ashamed that I was in this spot AGAIN. Went to rehab again for the 10th time, depressed and trying to think how to stop myself from thinking… All i wanna do is pick up. But I didn’t. I did my 2 weeks in detox, was released and now I’m going to meetings. Connecting with other sober people. Going to commitments and speaking to other addicts about my life. Currently, im working on going back to school to be an addiction counselor :green_heart:. We need to come together and kill this epidemic. Too many beautiful souls gone from this…

I hope you all are well and I welcome any new sober friends :smiley:. Take care and God Bless


Welcome to tbe forum and congrats on almost 3 months again :slight_smile:

Famous last words for many :joy:


Oh absolutely :joy::joy:

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Good for you! You’re making good choices and you’re learning, one step at a time, one day at a time. So many of us here have been through the same thing :innocent:

Looking forward to seeing you around! Take care & keep us updated.

Congratulations on your almost 90!! It sounds like you have been working hard!!

Sweet, I am almost 90 too!!!

I had 3 years clean and then decided that seeing as i had never abused alcohol only drugs… ( famous last words) i could drink!!! Here we are many years later after of course becoming a raging alcoholic.

We got this. :blush:

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Welcome. And congrats on almost 90. I’m almost 90 too. Thanks for the share. I’ve quit drinking so many times for a week or two here and a week or two there. Always to pick up a drink and try just having a drink or 2. And BAM! Next thing you know I’m having 3 or 4 or 7 drinks a day and next thing u know I’m doin bloody Mary’s in the morning. Alcohol has always been part of my life and I’ve always handled it well. So I thought. There’s plenty of good reasons to have a drink right now. I feel like I’m living in the Groundhog Day movie. But I think and pray I know I’ll never just have
“A Drink”. What’s the point? It always always always always leads to so many more drinks. Then I’ll have a hangover. Then I’ll feel like shit. Then I’ll beat myself up over it. I think it’s just easier being sober.
God Bless keep at it. You’re so worth it.
Stick around lots of wonderful people here with more insight than me.