Today is day 1 for me. Alcohol free. I have battled this for 15 years and I have been on and off the wagon countless times. For some reason i feel more afraid than usual this time around. Maybe thats a good thing? I just wanted to get some clarity from a sober community on a binge alcoholic, because thats what i am. I believe people in general, even my loved ones have a hard time understanding the fact even though i dont drink every single day, that i am still very well an alcoholic. I just want to hear that there are other people just like me.
Love you all and im grateful to have found this community
Welcome Hayley! So glad you’re here and today can be the 1st day of your happier/healthier life.
Others’ thoughts on whether we are or aren’t alcoholics is not required. When we know we just know. And when we’re done, we are done. And not a sip or hit before.
I had lots of people around me who’d say what was going on with me…they never really thought I was a drunk. Just a this or that. But I knew inside how it had me by the jiblets.
We don’t have to, or need to ever drink or use again.
Thank you!!! Youre exactly right about that! Its definitely not up to others to tell me whether or not i have a problem. Its a vicious cycle. I get about 14 days in and think i have control over it. Go back out drink for a few days and do it all over again. Im picking up the pieces and looking forward to a better life starting today! My house is in shambles. My clothes all smell like shit from the cigarettes and booze for the past 4 days and im just tired of it lol. Its the same behavior that i have been on for so long. Im well aware im going to lose ALOT of the people i have been close with because as most of you know, the local bars that we have spent all of our money in and the people we see when we are there become somewhat of a family in a way. But i ready for a sober family. I am ready for a change!! Im on my own making this decision and moving silently while doing so, but im so glad that i know i have this community to reach out to when i feel like i want to reach for the bottle.
Yes I’m on day 1 again feeling absolutely rubbish, messed up my job again, 4 day drinking benda, not got my kids to school, starting fresh tomorrow and start again x
Hi Haley! Great post! I am a binge alcoholic as well, but I keep it simple and just say I’m an alcoholic. I have no off switch once I start. The key is never starting. I have also been off and on with my commitment to sobriety, mainly because I seem skilled at convincing myself that since I don’t drink daily, I can be normal and have control. I cannot. I am not normal and have no control. This time around, that complete acceptance and surrender has been invaluable to changing my thinking. I am trying to keep it super simple since my brain is a con artist. I am an alcoholic. I decide not to drink. I never question that decision. Keep posting! This community is awesome.
Welcome Hayley glad you are here. You have undertaken a courageous first step. The first of many if you choose for it to be. I wouldn’t be too concerned with a label for yourself. You know what’s up and seem to have made a decision to change certain behaviors. Alchohol was not my substance of choice but addiction is the same no matter which one used us. Take a look around there’s a lot to explore. I have found this community to be key in my ongoing recovery. Wish you well.
Thank you for your reply. I couldn’t agree more and i understand the struggles of your mind wanting to play tricks on you. Key is to let these cravings pass and distract myself when im feeling tempted. Choosing a healthier way of life is something im more than ready for. Im still on the detox end of everything but when this is all over. I cant wait to get some good quality sleep, anxiety free, and no more night sweats lol. This will only get better as time goes on
good morning to you and heres to another day in recovery !