Hello. I need a change in my life. I feel as though I have no one who understands how hard this is. I am failing and flailing and really need some advice on how to beat this.
Hey there and welcome. It is hard, but doable. If I can stop drinking anyone can. It’s a daily thing. Some days are good and some are not so good. I found a support that I liked. I did counseling. It’s work every day. Glad you’re here
Take some deep breaths, and try and calm your mind. I know it’s hard to do, but try. Take your mind and thoughts somewhere else to the best of your ability. One breath at a time. Nothing else, just breath and focus on something that makes you happy. One moment at a time, it will get better.
Thank you. I’ve tried in the past and failed. I can see my future and if I don’t make a change now it isn’t good. I need to be a better person for my family and I just want this to be over and in the far past but… I am taking deep breaths.
I’m very early days here but 2 things that have helped me tremendously are:
One day at a time. Reminding myself to take it day by day. When I think about a future event or upcoming situation in which I would love to drink, I push it away and just focus on making it through today.
Being active in recovery. I’ve noticed on the few days that I’ve been less active in reading through forums or listening to podcasts or other things to in regards to sobriety, I start telling myself maybe I don’t have a problem, maybe I can drink again some time soon, and then I remind myself why I finally decided to get sober and start reading/listening again.
All I can say is there’s a lot of good info on these threads and I hope you find the motivation you need. Stay strong.
The biggest hurdle I had was actually admitting to myself that I had a problem, I checked myself into rehab and followed the directions of my sponsor. I’m still practicing sobriety by staying active In my recovery. I attend meetings, I talk about my recovery and help other addicts by sharing my experience, strength and hope. One day at a time. I no longer need drugs or alcohol to be Happy. God answered my prayers through the 12 step program. Eventhough I’m going on 8 months sober , I still have the strength as if it was that first day
Welcome Jenna, all it takes in the beginning is a desire to stop drinking/using. We all ultimately ask for help, some a bit early, when we’re done and others unfortunately when it’s too late.
Making this as simple as possible works. Overthinking it will lead us back to painville…
Reach out to sober people in person-- consider meetings, coming on here often, and do help others trying to get clean and sober. It is what keeps us focused on the prize: a life free of insanity.
No one can stop or speed up time, that is why the quote of one day at a fucking time rings true. We focus on today as this is the day that counts the most.
Hugs & glad you’re here.
Everything starts with day one. If you have day one you’ve already begun a new behavior . It’s about routines. Establishing habits that care for your inner core that is your character. It’s about self love and becoming your own friend.
Well you are in the right place to find people who do know how hard it can be.
We are also the people who can support each other and lift each other up.
We are also the people who can share information and resources to make it better.
The first days are very hard. Your body and mind are accustomed to feeding an addiction that has taken control. With strategies that make sense to you, you can carefully start to take back your mind and body. It may be different strategies for different people, but in the end the addiction must be addressed and recovery means taking back your life.
In the first few weeks I found that checking in here and reading everything I could find on addiction was helpful. I also took hot showers to relax and worked hard on getting to bed early. Being amazed at clear headed mornings helped motivate me every day to do it again.
Different folks use AA meetings, meditation, exercise, prayer, therapy, medical treatment, medication, substitution habits, etc. This community can keep on giving suggestions until you find what works for you.
I’m on day 271 after 30 years of alcohol abuse and I could not be more pleased with this change. It is work and continued effort, but it is definitely worth it.
One day at a time, one strategy at a time. Make an informed decision about addiction and use every tool you can to heal yourself.
I wish you the best and welcome you here!
Thanks! So far I’ve been on here, focusing on work, and rented this naked mind audiobook. Thank you for your kind words and advice
This Naked Mind was instrumental for me. She made it clear that alcohol is an addictive poison and that overcoming that addiction takes more than willpower.
She has a good podcast too.
Attend a zoom AA meeting tonight. Download the Everything AA app and find online meetings ! It’s been my life savior since day 1 & I’m on day 33 today & I’ve been to at least 25 meetings !