Hello my name is Kyle and for years I have fought a gambling addiction, around 6 years ago I quit gambling completely after reaching the lowest point and come and clean to my family about the problem that had been hiding for years.
Over the past few years I’ve been gambling game on and off which no one is aware of. Like many others on here I thought that I was in control and able to deal with my urges, in the last month I have really read in the highs and lows and yesterday was a real low. Just a week ago it seemed everything I bet on won and I had re gained any losses that I had incurred over the previous month. Then yesterday like many of you on here will of experienced it all came crashing down. I had worked so hard this year and our money aside and saved and all of that work was undone yesterday with a few hours of desperarion chasing losses.
Last night I really did reach a low and I know I can only help myself, I hope with the help of this forum I am able to live my life without gambling, I have have managed 2 years previously and slowly fell back into the cycle. At 8pm it will be my first 24 hours complete, the hardest part for me has been a Monday when I am off and found myself walking into various bookies. My first goal is to make 7 days and I am 1 step closer.
Today felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders but I know I am a long way from recovery and a long long way from earning back the money that I so frantically wasted yesterday. I feel ashamed at how much I lost and on such stupid things but I have to look forward and get the grit between my teeth. I have opted out on all online bookies previously but I think the time has came where I need to walk into the shops I frequently go to and self exclude.
I will update this post but just wanted to talk to let some steam off.
Thanks, at the minute I need as much support as possible.
48 hours nearly complete and I would by lying if I didn’t say I had urges. A day of highs and lows or emotion, one minute thinking how stupid I have been and how long it’s going to take to re-earn the losses of Monday, a few hours of madness could take a year’s worth of saving. Then the next thinking what if I could win it back. At the minute I have stayed strong, not taken my cards out with me so limiting any opportunity to gamble.
I have been here before and ridden this wave of emotion, I just have to stay strong and keep looking forward to a more positive future.
Win or lose, you know that you cannot gamble anymore.
Understand that the gambling industry is set up with odds that favor the industry as opposed to the gambler. Keep gambling, and you’ll wind up losing more.
Many of us have spent tons of money to support our addictions. Instead of looking at sobriety as an opportunity lost to make up losses, it would be better to view it as money saved each day choosen not to gamble.
Theres only one bet you have to say, “No,” to; the one that matters, the first one.
Say, “No,” to the first bet, and you won’t have to say, “No,” to the second, or the 3rd, or the 5th, or the 8th.
If I say, “Yes,” to the first, I’m at the mercy of my addiction.
Well unfortunately in the last 26 days I have had 2 major relapses and I am now in a much worse situation than I was at the start of this topic both financially and emotionally. I went ten days and then I don’t know what came over me, I started gambling, winning and then chucked it all away and more. Then it continued.
I’m now 36 hours without gambling and seeing a full day complete did feel like a relief. I am off work for a few days now which is often when gambling happens. I have froze my bank cards so they can not be used on any form of gambling so this will definitely help as I would just find a new bookies to use and use my card to gamble.
I don’t want to let myself or anyone else down this time.
Congrats on 36 hours! Sounds like you’re making some changes this time around by freezing your cards. You have to find things to keep busy while your off from work. Also, come here and chat if you get urges, we’re all here to help each other. Hang in there friend and stay strong. Take it hour by hour.
