Day 5 of 1000 start overs

I’ve enjoyed writing in the diary each day. I have not set a strong end goal with this attempt as it always falls apart when I make a commitment to quit A. My strategy this time is to recognize the thought that starts the path to wrong choices, and quickly stop the thought, and immediately think of another drink choice. So far so good.

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When you make a commitment, what are you doing to help yourself? Coming here is a great first step.

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Maybe try a meeting new mind set is needed wish you well

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I usually don’t have a strategy beyond “don’t drink!”. I guess I believed it was just a behavior to be re-wired rather than a form of psychological strategy to cope. This time, I’m trying to recognize the feelings and thoughts to see what’s going on inside. I’ve never been to a meeting as I’m scared someone will recognize me, so that tells me I have shame. I guess going to a meeting will confirm I have a problem - something I don’t want to be identified with. I’m scared if I get sober, I’ll confirm that I’m a talentless, unworthy nothing: at least now, I have an excuse for not succeeding. I’m sure I’ll unravel if I examine this issue, and ruin the good that I have at the moment. I cannot see a life beyond what it is now.

Welcome to the club! A lot of us dealt with those things. People will chime in, I am sure…as far as being recognized in a meeting…I had the same damn fear. Those people are there for the same reason as you!

If not AA, counseling or therapy