How do you come to terms with being mismedicated by a doctor? Spending 5 years in a haze of antidepressants and not understanding who you were, your actions or what you were doing when on these medications? After the brain fog clears and reality comes to fruition and you realize you’ve lost everything. How do you deal with the shame and guilt, the embarrassment and loss.
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Start with acceptance of the reality, that you have no power to change the past. Control what you can, your actions for today. I know it isn’t much for advice, but it’s all i have for you. Best wishes
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Dan hit the nail on the head, acceptance is the answer. We can not change the past and the more we live in it with regret, shame, and remorse the more we incease our suffering.
It has not been easy for me to let go of my past and the more painful something is the tighter I seem to hold onto it. Strange I know, but that is just what I have noticed in my own behaviors. I for one have gotten so used to living pain and suffering that when I think about freedom from that it feels frightening at times. I also had to take a good look at where I was holding resentments because some that I didn’t realize I had were stopping me from letting go of somethings. It takes time, lots of patience and lots of self compassion. Go easy on yourself, you have been doing the best you could with what you had in that moment.
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Thanks Stella. Alot of my pain comes from the fact I was very successful in my career but working in an extremely toxic and high stress environment. I faced workplace harassment and abuse on a weekly basis and when I tried to address these issues through the proper channels in union/company workplace harassment complaints I was fired. All while taking care of a 3 and 5 year old. In the last year I’ve lost my home, vehicle and most of my belongings as a result of the termination. While going through all of this I started using cannabis and sex as an escape. Now that I’m out of the toxic situation I’ve stopped seeking sex and stopped using cannabis but suffering from major depression. I tried to seek therapy and medications during my time at work but the meds seemed to only make things works.
I’m struggling with accepting the loss and that the abuse and laws to stop the abuse were completely ignored. The behaviors only started when the abuse did and stopped when the abuse stopped. at 43 I’ve lost everything and struggle with the fear about how I’m going to take care of my kids in the future. I guess I need to just let it all go and start rebuilding… but what my previous employer did left me in so much debt things just feel hopeless. Anyway I’m just venting now… I’m trying to put the past behind me but there are so many triggers daily that bring it back I’m struggling. Passing my old house, seeing fellow past employees, waking up in a small apartment and not having any space for my kids and I… it all floods back and feels so fresh. I should say I wasn’t the only one who faced these abuses at work but because my company pays big salaries no one else would come forward as I made an example of. any suggestions on how to start fresh? I’ve been trying to spend a lot of time in nature, doing art and crafts daily , practicing gratitude for what I do have… but man it’s an uphill battle.
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Yes I do, best way to start fresh everyday and leave all the bullshit behind is with gratitude for what you do have. It may not be what you had before or exactly what you want for the future but it’s what you have today and it’s something.
It’s going to be ok, even though it feels overwhelming right now, it will get better.
Come join us on this thread… hope to see you there.
Daily Gratitude List #3
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Still new to this app. I’ll see what I can figure out. thanks for reaching out and helping out.
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Welcome to the forum! 2022 edition 
In that case, welcome!!! Here are some great resources on the forum. Any blue lettering in a post will be a direct link. Have fun, read as much as you can, there are a lot of inspiring stories here.
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I’m sorry to hear you are going through so much🤗
Hold your head up strong, you deserve better.
You still have your family 
slowly you will build your life back to comfortable.
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