Dear Diary... It's Me Again

sobriety
alcohol
motivation

#1

So here i am again, giving this whole sober thing another try. I think this past weekend has been a real eye opener and I’m glad I’m on vacation from work because I’m still feeling the effects of being plastered from Friday night until Sunday night smh. I just don’t understand why I have to go overboard every time!? Why can’t I just have a few… feel good… and stop but noooooo I’m not happy until I can’t remember what happened the night before. It makes me feel weak that i can’t control it, that i can’t control me.


#2

Welcome to the story of all of us. Hop back on that train and dig deep to dig yourself out.


#3

Thank you. I have planned out my whole day and my boyfriend is removing the alcohol from the house this morning. I had started on a healthy journey and dropped the ball a few months ago so I’m picking up where I left off. With no alcohol i should see even better results… hopefully :blush::grin:


#4

Welcome to the forum. Planning is a great idea! Most people here can tell you that without a plan, you probably won’t be able to stay sober.

Check in and post often!


#5

Get yourself some nice seltzer and eat what you want for a bit. Next time you feel like you can handle a drink or two remember this feeling and all the dumb shit you did when drinking, you know, from what you can actually remember :grin: This all helps me​:blush:


#6

Thank you for the welcome :blush:


#7

I remember when I stopped before I ate so much candy :flushed: I already love and eat probably too much as it is so I’m going to the store today to get some fruit and also a bag of sugar free candy for when I’m about ready to use an apple as a weapon :joy:


#8

:joy: I find smoothies and herbal teas helpful.


#9

Thanks for the ideas! I actually enjoy both too but never thought of them to help with my cravings.


#10

Maybe a meeting?


#11

I’ve never been. Could be why I didn’t hang on to my sobriety before. Just don’t know what I would say :confused: I’m so disappointed in myself and I’m afraid it (disappointment) will lead me to severe depression again. I don’t know what to do but keep myself busy and try to stay focused and positive.


#12

You could start by going there and listening to what others say.


#13

I went to one and didn’t speak, I just listened.


#14

Try a meeting they will help wish you well


#15

I have been to meetings amd it makes me want to use more is that normal


#16

You said earlier that you’ve never been to a meeting I thought? But as an addict your normal state of being is wanting to use. That’s how we are wired. In fact, in early recovery you are probably going to want to use all the time. You have a disease that needs treatment. That treatment takes time. You aren’t going to do anything for just a week and be cured. You are going to have to work hard at sobriety, and it’s going to take time. Like all things worth having sobriety is hard work, but the payoff is a life beyond your wildest dreams.


#17

Dont think so , desire and effort is needed and meeting make it easier not harder ?


#18

I did the recovery thing on my own for 66days it was so hard … i turned up to a meeting and only been going 4 the past week and i love them … its a place where every one understands you and what u r going through… im day 75 and im so happy my depression has lifted my anxiety is getting better… i really believe aa and ca have saved me … x


#19

Thank you!


#20

Hey you may have me and @Carlyhope mixed up… I’m the one who earlier said I had never been to a meeting. :green_heart: I get that it’s going to take time and I’ve got a lot of work ahead of me. I did good all day until i sat still this afternoon and I was alone and I couldn’t respond on here because my account is new and I had ran out of posts for 10 hrs :unamused: but I made it… I was SO happy to see my boyfriend pull up lol