How does everyone cope with the depression that comes with giving up something that has been so much a part of your life?? I am lost really feel I have no purpose, alcohol was hiding all these feelings now I am scared I am pushing people away as I can spend days crying and not being able to get out of bed. I have no motivation! I thought quitting would make me more awake and be more active but I can’t seem to get out of this depression I find myself in which has taken me by surprise as never been one for getting low but then I was always drinking. I just feel that I have nothing to offer anyone. I work and sleep. I used to travel alot and that kept me occupied but I feel this whole settling down lifestyle so dull and I keep getting told well that’s life deal with it. Feeling worthless is not one of the withdrawal symptoms I expected! Anyone any advice or shall I got to the doctor?? As I feel if my drinking didn’t push everyone away then my depressed mood will. Help
You need to go see a doctor. You might be duel-diagnosed with depression and anxiety and can get help. You’re not alone in this…many of us drank to cover it up
Thank you! This is horrible how do we face it, half of me is like just have a drink and it will be sorted but I know that is not the answer and will only add to the problems. This is going to be the hardest thing I have ever done to leave my comfort blanket of drinking and face my issues that I have masked so far. Shit, no one said life was easy but how do we make it so difficult for ourselves!! I seem to be my own worst enemy!! What will a doctor do as don’t want any drugs??
Tell them just that…that you’re feeling depressed, you just quit drinking, but don’t want to be put on meds and see what they suggest. There is exercise, diet, vitamins, and other herbal remedies that could help.
Sorry your going through a rough patch, I know the feels! I am like a rollercoaster of feelings over here myself being so new to committed recovery.
For me, I drank to suppress feelings that I didnt want to feel. We are kinda wired to want to feel good and avoid pain and I was doing an amazing job lol. But our subconscious seems to have a mind and memory of its own and by bandaging these emotional wounds by drinking, we are really just giving them a chance to fester and become infected with even more toxic stuff. My advise to you is BREATHE, go slow, ride the wave. CRY, sleep, process, be proactive about addressing the wound and all its oozing chaos… it won’t go away unless its treated. Sometimes, seeing a Dr and minimizing the anxiety/depression helps us be able to deal with it, but sometimes depending on brain chemistry, it also just prolongs the process.
Like @Melrm said, communicate well with your Dr but also incorporate other things to help you on a holistic level.
Remember that alcohol depletes your body of B vitamins in a severe way. A lack of B’s alone CAUSES anxiety and depression. By upping your B’s you can also ward off anxiety and its root cause. I am the QUEEN of anxiety. I’ve been on EVERY Rx available… at one point I was on the highest dose of valium a person can get-
Keep active on this community! Theres a great support here! (hug)
Thank you!! I have been taking complex b vita and omega oils everyday I just need to get out of this fog I find myself in. I don’t know I just felt like when I left drinking behind suddenly the world would become a lovelier clearer place but it seems darker and I don’t know which direction to take and it’s taking a while to find out who I am. My parents both had depression and I have seen it first hand and I think that more than anything I am afraid of turning into them. Just can’t seem to find then fun in the little things that I thought I would I am bored so bored. I will keep posting but don’t want to bring people down who are struggling wouldnt feel confident in the advice I can offer. Thank you, I will show the doctor what I am taking vitamin wise and ask for help. Thank you for the support I seem to tell you guys stuff but I shut my boyfriend out afraid he won’t be able to deal with my issues and leave but trying to act happy is false at the moment. I don’t want to lose him.
Hi there, How long have you been sober? I went through a very depressed period and felt so fed up and bored and like what was the point in anything I think that was maybe about 6 weeks into my sobriety, I am 9 weeks now and it has mostly passed for now, I think we are bound to feel sad etc… As drinking was such a big part of our lives its like losing your best friend in a way!! Chin up and keep posting, its such a great forum and we will help you get through this x
Thank you only on two weeks!! I think I knew it would happen eventually. Just need to focus on what to do now and move forward. Find a purpose and not push away those around me. It just feels like a downward spiral at the moment. Thought my days of lying on the sofa feeling sorry for myself were over.
Clinical depression? I doubt it, you would still have been depressed when you were drinking.
More likely, you’re rediscovering your emotions, feelings, and thoughts. Also, alcohol DOES make certain moments SEEM incredibly fun. It’s very good at letting the “more fun” version of you out.
In your previous description, it’s as if you deleted this part of you, as you decided on sobreity. You should tap into that part and apply it to sober things. If you think sobriety is “dull,” this isn’t recovery, it’s a relapse waiting to happen.
Another undertone of your post depicts pushing people away. You’re being far too hard on yourself, you’re creating this outlook, and with it, a very real outcome. Be positive, be active, stop crying over spilt milk, and embrace who you are and who you want to be. Alcohol was a crutch that made things seem better, you’re stronger than that delusion, now prove it.
Yet another post that requires this ideological statement: throw me to the wolves and I’ll return leading the pack!
Tap into that inner wolf!
Thank you I needed that!!
Sobriety is not what is dull,I have no intention of relapsing, I think something has been missing for a while now just need to figure out what!
Thanks everyone for the boast feeling alot more positive!
Alcohol is a depressant; if you drank for a long time your brain becomes dependent on those depressant chemicals. It’s very similar to quitting antidepressants suddenly which can exacerbate symptoms of depression! Give yourself some time to be depressed, it’s okay! If you don’t feel better within a week or two I would see a doctor to get some help helping your brain recover. Sobriety and recovery is a physical, emotional, and CHEMICAL process! Try some activities that cheer you up, or it may even help to rent a few sad movies and cry while you eat your favorite snacks for a weekend. Whatever you need to do to feel better should be done for a few days! 
Take care of yourself and know that it’s okay to feel sad and fall apart… remember that it’s just chemistry and it will pass! Hugs!
@NatalieE
Hi. I am 19 days sober. And restless and moody and bored, have not slept well. The gray weather is not helping. But I know that it will get better. Keep the faith !
I am hoping so!! I need to make some changes to make myself happy now that I can no longer numb my feelings and I think that is scary.
Just need to go for it and not worry I will have my instincts intact to deal with anything!!
I will not be like my parents and they will not be my excuse but my drive for change!!
Well done Natalie it’s all about changes. I did exactly what you did. I numbed myself everyday because I battle with depression. That feeling of sadness is so overwhelming for me, but I’ve been making adjustments everyday to help me beat my addiction. I bought a Fitbit and I’m becoming more active and that’s helped me out a lot. I created a non profit organization all my myself, Natalie! Something I would have never even thought of if I were drinking. It’s a good time to find hobbies and do what you like/love. This is our lives… we have to make the effort to find happiness because it’s not just going to come and knock on our door, ya know? Thank you for sharing it helped me today
I would just like to add that talk therapy can be immensely helpful. Not every doctor will try to put you on meds especially with a history of substance abuse. Find a therapist who creates a safe space for you to address your issues. Regardless of whether you have clinical depression or not, I believe that you could benefit from an open ear from someone with professional insight.
You are not alone! Many of us have used alcohol (among other things) as (negative) coping mechanisms instead of confronting our emotions directly for years. It’s like we have to reprogram ourselves to function in life.
Stay strong! One day at a time. Focus on small accomplishments first. Sometimes even just changing clothes or going outside for a few minutes can help. For me taking a long shower or bath and washing my hair can help to change my attitude for a little while. I hope this helps.