Well my buddies and I had plans today to meet up and hangout while my gf was out with her work friends. Well it is now 9pm Chicago time and my txts have been ignored since 6pm when they said they were coming to pick me up. Have a feeling they decided to go out to the bars and just ditch me entirely. It’s rough because now I’m stuck at home when I planned to hangout with them for the first time in a month. Anyways I feel it’s time I try to make sober friends. Where can I do this besides a.a? Everyone at a.a is usually 5x older than I am… or if they are young they have virtually no sober time. This app has been the closest thing to sober friends then I ever have had…
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I hear ya dude. I’m a country boy, and getting used to flakes was the first milestone I had sheen moving to the city (dunno if being country has anything to do with it, but growing up yes meant yes and no meant no - that’s just the way it was).
It’s cliche, but one of the better places to meet friends is church.
I wouldn’t go for traditional Bible study stuff, but if you have a big church around your area are if they have any kind of intramural stuff going on. Kickball, volleyball, some type of exercise regime, etc.
If church isn’t an option, try to see if your city hosts some sort of intramural sports. I live in a big city and there’s tons of sign up sheets online for all kinds of stuff. It’s potluck too so they expect a bunch of people who don’t know each other to team up.
Lastly, try meetup.com. Find a group you’re interested in (dog walkers, board gamer, etc.) and go to an event. I go to a board gaming one every now and then and always have a good time.
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What kind of hobbies do you have or hobbies you’ve always wished you had but didn’t have bc of drinking? Drunks dont usually voluteer so you could try volunteering in something you’re passionate about. In chicago I’d imagine (never been just an assumption) there are social groups you can join where they do other things besides drink.Anything that is going to be good for your health and wellness will most likely have some sober or practically sober people. @Steve92 I’m going to try all of the above which Is why I shared with you because it’s only a matter of time before the “friends” hit the fan over here. I know it’ll work out for you! Life has a funny way of doing that sometimes!
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Maybe some Meetup groups in your area that do stuff you like. I’ve only joined one but it’s great. They do tons of stuff and the people are friendly.
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I’m sorry that happened, it sucks and it hurts. I agree with finding somewhere to volunteer is a great idea. Even if you don’t meet new friends, you’ll have fun and feel good.
Maybe try finding a new hobby or activity that you can do alone? I’ve found that in order to do things sober, sometimes I just have to do things alone. So when plans with friends fail, or they are all drinking, I have some options.
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Wow thanks for all the advice. I never hear I’d a meet up before IL have to look into that. And volunteering is something I keep wanting to do I just have to find the right thing to do. I just feel like I’m gonna lose 90 % of my old high school friends cuz I’m sober now. I used to be the one who called them all together to come over and drink and now I guess I’m the “lame” one. They tell me to just drink on special occasions or just stop after a few and tell me I don’t have a problem it’s just the hospitals trying to get my money lol and that Pisses me off so much cuz I was the one who admitted myself to the hospital last time. Anyways thanks again I am going on a search tomorrow.
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Meet up app is great because you choose your hobbies or interests and it shows you all the places and different groups. I’m pretty sure you can choose sober groups. I’m actually going to download app again.
Your friends get 3 thumbs down from me lol. You know what I find annoying? When I go out with people and I tell them I’m not drinking and they get all weird 
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Something I’ve learned @Steve92 about friends who disappeared after I announced that I quit drinking are not friends at all. Your real friends would find sober activities to do with you outside of their time at the bar if they truly care about you and your wellbeing and spending quality time with their friend. A lot of people in my old life just saw me as the fun party girl, and once that was gone, so were they.
Meetup is a fantastic app, and should definitely have some activities for you to participate in sober! Good luck 
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It’s been mostly my choice, but the only friend I’ve hung out with since putting down my last drink 32 days ago is a golf buddy who quit drinking 7 years ago. Another thing that has me thinking is this. When I was drinking I would always instigate the going out. Now that I’m not doing that I’ve heard from none of those people I usually hit the bars with… (and none of them know I quit drinking yet)…very interesting. Feeling very unpopular… oh well, fuck em’.
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thing is boozing took up all of our time and when you stop there is a big void. I do think that with time the guys will accept that you don’t drink, a permanent designated sober driver what a win for them. At the end of the day you can still be fun to be with even if you aren’t pissed.
Sometimes you have to acknowledge the elephant in the room.
Hung out with some family members and they were all weirded out because they were drinking and I wasn’t.
I just told them that I don’t have a problem if you drink, I just have a problem when I drink.
Seemed to change the mood and it wasn’t an issue after that.
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AA has young people meetings. You just have to find them. You can also go to other 12 step meetings - HA (heroin anonymous) tends to have a young crowd! You don’t need to be a heroin addict to attend!
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There is an app called sober grid. It is kind of the format of Facebook with a sober feel to it LOL. You can see who is near your area and find other sober people you there for support groups, friends, Etca. It’s all what you want it to be. Take what you can use from it and leave the rest. 
it is tough. And I’m sorry that your friends did that to you.
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My old drinking “friends”, if you wanna call em that avoid me like the plague like I have sobriety leprosy or something. The true friends could care less and still want to be around.
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@Cece That’s a bad ass tattoo
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Thanks I got it when I was about 30 days. I need all the reminders of what I’m doing that I can get LOL
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I’m going to try that next time! Thank you
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