Both me and my boyfriend are alcoholics, and for our whole relationship, we’ve done our drinking binges together just about every weekend. I’m ready to get sober, and when I told him, he said “let’s do it” but, you know, I don’t know if was just saying that in the moment or if he really wants to, since it was the first time in our relationship even acknowledging alcohol like that. Have any of you dated someone with a shared addiction and you both were able to get sober together?
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you will need to have a very strong loving relationship. atm I’m the only clean and sober one and that’s a whole new ball game but once we both quit together and we absolutely hated each other. The most important to do is talk to each other about how you are feeling at that moment, don’t keep it all inside and then when one of you does something to annoy the other, Like breathing, 
it all comes out and turns into a huge argument. Just say OMG this is awful how are you doing bc your ups and downs won’t always be the same time. Tell each other if you need to be left alone for a while or your going to lose the plot. It can be done as long as you are aware of why you are feeling how you do and think before you speak.
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My husband still drinks. We formed our relationship around drinking and drugs a few decades ago. Drinking defined us for sure, so I get that. He wasn’t/ isn’t ready for sobriety. It was a bit of a struggle getting sober around him (understatement…getting sober was a slog for me, nothing to do woth him), but I managed once I really owned what I could control (me myself and I).
My suggestion would be to focus on your own sobriety and if he is along, all the better. But…do you and focus on what is best for you. Make him responsible for his own self and own sobriety. Tho I think having you both working on sobriety is great, being self focused is important so that if one of you falls down, they don’t drag the other with them.
I applaud you both and also suggest you read lots of threads here. 
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I’m on day 50 and I’ve been having a rough couple weeks. I needed to stop drinking for a lot of reasons and I didnt ask my bf to stop with me. He never gets out of control. And it honestly doesn’t bother me bc I’m done with it. 19 years was enough for me. But communication is key and i havent been releasing my emotions properly and have caused a distance between us. I realized I just need to work on myself more and figure out how to process my feelings in a productive way. Whether your man sticks to his word or not, do it for yourself. There will be ups and downs for sure but as long as you keep at it, the efforts will be worth it. At least that’s what I’m hoping.
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My spouse and I are both sober. He has 12 years more than me. We attend AA meetings, women’s mtg for me and men’s stag for him. I really don’t like to go to meetings with him. Shhhh, don’t tell him. Lol But his shares are kinda preachy and he talks too much. But, we’re sober and it works for us. 
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I will add that our relationship is much healthier and happier since I got sober. Amen to no drunken arguments.
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I’m working on day 11 and not having much trouble yet. Wifey still drinks. Plenty!! I do pretty good until around dinner time when she breaks out the martinis. For herself. I’m not tempted to drink but I do feel all alone and lonely and a little depressed.
But I will not drink!
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A lot of my past relationships started out with drunk-me getting along with drunk-him; turns out that’s not always a solid foundation long term. Yes, who knew. With my ex who is dad of my two younger kids, I quit drinking in pregnancy and a couple of times apart from that. He pretended to quit when I first got pregnant but he was sneaking drinks. I think the most important thing is to quit for you, to be clear on what you’re working for, and not let your partner’s drinking be an excuse for you not to fix yours. I made that mistake, the drinking was part of some toxic codependency and denial issues, and I’m glad to be out of it. It’s great if you can both be growing and getting better together, but even if that doesn’t happen, if the timing isn’t right, or if your partner just doesn’t see the issues you see, you gotta do you.
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My girlfriend had been in recovery when we met. She hated my drinking and I don’t know why she didn’t kick my ass to the curb, but here we are almost a year after I got out of rehab making long-term plans together. I don’t know the secret and I have no answers. And that’s just how life is.
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Right? I was living with my girlfriend when I got out of rehab. I didn’t think I was into her anymore for the first 4 or 5 months of sobriety. I had a bad day and spent a lot of time reflecting on my attitude about my life and the shame the I felt. Took me a few weeks but I found my focus and things are definitely different, but much, much better.
UPDATE: Well, we got married on February 29th. So, I guess it can work out.
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My spouse is sober. He did it first. I saw how happy he became, so I followed.
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I hope I can rub off a little on my wife.
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Goal I have for my family… That’s awesome!!! 
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For the most part considering you both take recovery seriously then it does have a possibility of working out for the better. But on the other hand if on of you grows more than the other in recovery then there’s a good chance you will find more value for yourself then what you thought was a stable Relationship.