Do I even belong here?

Hello everyone, I haven’t posted in a while, but I still come on and read every single day. I haven’t had a drop of alcohol in 125 days. My life is improving by the day. I am more motivated, more calm and clear, and am actively reading books on sobriety, and made an appointment with a counselor to address some things from my past that most likely contributed to me abusing alcohol.
My challenge is- do I belong here?
This poor beaten dead horse called marijuana has thrown me for a loop. I never claimed to be “clean and sober”, nor do I really talk about my use because this is a sobriety forum. However, I feel like I cannot be honest now about my journey. I know this is ultimately my own path, and I will continue on it regardless of what others think, but I can only focus on one thing at a time. And I chose the thing I considered an addiction that was taking everything from me.
This is not meant to open up the can of worms again on the topic, but can I still consider myself welcome and encouraged to share my experiences?
Maybe I’m just a fraud and fooling myself that I’m doing well. According to a lot of people on here, it sure seems that way.
I never want people to feel bothered because they have made the choice and put in the effort to be clean and sober from everything, and here I am, using something that helps me. I don’t know. I guess if this starts a whirl wind, I have my answer.
I am grateful for this place because I found people who understand. And it has been paramount for me leaving alcohol behind and living a better life. Perhaps after I am more confident, and after some therapy, I will let go of some other things as well…
Anyway, these are my thoughts, take 'em or leave 'em.
:peace_symbol: :white_heart:

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Opinions are numerous on here. The only one that should matter is your own. We each walk this path at our own pace and only you can decide what is best for you. Who are we to judge you and your decisions? If this forum has helped you stay AF and that has been your problem than don’t change up what is working for you. I will never tell you what you should or shouldn’t do. To thine own self be true.

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Many people here use substances/ processes that others are addicted to.

The rules ask us to be mindful of people with other addictions and keep our focus on how we want to stop using our DOC. But we all have to choose what we talk about here, and posts that fall foul of the rules will be flagged.

From a moderators perspective, as long as people stick to the rules they are welcome. Whether you belong here is ultimately for you to decide! But I’d say if you find it a helpful tool in your recovery journey, then you probably do :blush:

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Thanks @Fargesia_murielae, I appreciate it so much.

Isn’t that the truth. I know we have people here with all various types of addiction, but the constant conflict between people is discouraging at times. And I am absolutely here to discover my own path. :white_heart:

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@Inneed yes. I strive to always be true to myself. In my experience, it’s not always the popular way to be, but that’s how I roll. And @siand, I promise not to break the rules :blush:
This place is a mostly positive tool for me, which is why I’d love to still be here. When I don’t like an opinion, I scroll on by…
Thank you.

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Hi, yes, eventually I plan to. I mostly use it to stimulate my poor appetite and slow the spinning thoughts down a little to process them. My hope is after some talk therapy, I’ll find other ways to do this. I’m already on medication, and I don’t want to take any more!

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JEN WHAT ARE YOU THINKING!!! I LOVE your posts!! Don’t leave me :tired_face: I’ve always felt like we were on the same page and I feel no different now! OK a little dramatic… but I feel your presence is so valuable :heart:

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:joy: omg thank you! :white_heart:

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Hahahaha hey, I liked it

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:sweat_smile: Just passionate LMAO

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TRUE STORY. I know I have it in me, I’m getting there. Thank you. See? The more people are able to be honest without being attacked, will honestly be better in the long run. This is a perfect example of an actual discussion.

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I think anyone who is fighting addiction is welcome here. And I understand the balance of wanting to be honest, and wanting to be sensitive. So long as ur posts aren’t all “yay, pot!” then it is ok to share ur journey, imo.

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Of course you belong here! You’re doing an amazing job staying sober from alcohol; that’s huge. You always make great contributions to the forum and I’ve always enjoyed reading your posts!

In my opinion, even if you didn’t ditch the marijuana you would be welcome here as long as you didn’t post under the influence and kept your posts centered around sobriety from alcohol or seeking suggestions on sobriety in terms of marijuana. We can’t all fix all of our own issues overnight and it sounds like weed is one thing you’re planning on quitting you just prioritized alcohol first.

Stick around :slightly_smiling_face:

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@stop.the.ride, your contributions here are so helpful. If you didn’t talk about the pot just now I never would have known. Meaning…you are consistent and rationale and have never appeared to be high.

I like what Nordique said:

If this place is helping you stay AF, please stick around. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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I am a firm believer in following your own path…wherever that leads. I do 100% think you belong here. What is asked of us is that we don’t discuss using or moderation…because our path is our own and while xyz may work well for you and your unique self…xyz may trigger the next person or be the demon they are trying to slay. So many variations of substance abuse and addiction!! I know it is a lot to try to navigate at times and many of us feel the need to not share as much because we are mindful of others journeys.

That said, I sometimes use medical marijuana for sleep, as prescribed by my doctor. For me, that does not change my status as sober. And that is all that matters for me…my honesty with myself and my integrity around using marijuana gels to sleep.

I do hope you will stay. I know it can be overwhelming and confusing when the forum goes through periods of disharmony. I guess I liken it to growing pains or adolescence. New folks come in and as they begin to integrate in, the usual suspects of questions arise and off we go. And as in life there will be conflict. It is exasperating going thru this over and over…but for myself, therein lies the lesson. What is this conflict trying to teach me? What am I not getting? How can my needs get met here? How can I help others get their needs met?

Thank you for raising an important subject. We all belong here. :heart:

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I sometimes drink and very rarely do drugs. I just make sure that I’m not on the forum as long as that stuff is in my body and I don’t promote using. So as long as you’re sober whilst on the forum and don’t promote weed, I see no problem

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Thank you guys so very much. I didn’t know that anyone appreciated my posts, and as much as I like to pretend like I don’t care what people think, I believe a part of all of us feel the need to be accepted and encouraged in some way.
Whenever I do something, I take it very seriously. So my sobriety from alcohol is #1 right now. I give it my all.
We do all belong here. We are all just humans trying to be better.
Much love

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I’m in the same place as you are. 4 months and 4 days. And do take marijuana from time to time. I too felt like an imposter. But I have quit drinking and smoking cigarettes which we’re causing harm and pain, emotional and physical. I notice I need it less as I feel better, stronger, more confident and whole. I don’t talk about it. I Know its time will pass. And I will be my true self but for now it’s working. Thanks for the Post.

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When I attended online AA in Germany the only thing that one had to have was the wish to stop drinking /using whatever. This was an email online meeting and I am sure that many still drank. But, at least for me, this doesn’t matter. We are all on our journey. Maybe reading will help you to find your way or I’d say find a way that you like and wish to continue. Mine is to stay sober and as it is fairly easy for me with alcohol now I start to be more conscious what I still use to distract me from my feelings (eating, caffeine etc). Everyone should be welcome here. When we accept the rules, no problem. :innocent:

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Thank you for understanding and for your response. I think we are doing just fine. :slightly_smiling_face:

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