Hi, I’m in a social setting and there’s alcohol. I don’t want to drink but in the other hand, it will look strange if I don’t. That’s why I went to get alcohol-free beer but there wasn’t any, so I got one that’s mixed with grapefruit juice and has 2,5% alcohol (it’s a 500ml can) so it’s very very light and it will not cause any effect whatsoever. Will it count as a relapse?
Sorry if it’s a dumb question.
(Context: I’m going on 11 days, and was a weekend binge drinker and drinking hiding from people so I’d get drunk faster).
I’m also newly sober and stumbled quick getting trashed with close friends at a celebration. Five days back sober, again.
I’d say it’s a relapse, but language is troubling to people, especially if you’re smart. Being smart is a huge obstacle to staying sober, because you’re going to have a lot more language to equip you to justification.
I don’t believe in being harsh with yourself when you relapse, because plaguing yourself with big nasty words and guilt aren’t really helpful when it comes to stay sober. Don’t let your language part of your brain play tricks on you with “does this count”, because sobriety is at base dedicating yourself to the idea of optimal functioning in all parts of your life! So no hard pass on this mess up, but it sounds like you didn’t do anything tragic. Just be honest with yourself about what you need, which isn’t necessarily what other people you were hanging with need. Good luck!
Making a decision to drink alcohol means starting over. There’s always non alcoholic version of drinks that look like real drinks so you don’t have to explain yourself.
You consciously chose to buy the drink (and I assume drink the drink) then yes, reset.
Next time get a sparkling water and don’t worry about how it looks. Honestly, people really don’t care if you don’t drink. If they ask why you just say “I’ve decided to stop drinking”. They’ll give up on the conversation fairly quickly.
Why is it wierd for someone to drink a soda? When im around drinkers i bring my own soda because thre only option to drink there is beer and i prefer not to. Just bring a cooler of your fav. Beverage who cares what others think…i get looks at my hand and what im drinking but no one ever really says anything knowing i dont drink.
Also former bartender: N/A beer is not alcohol free. Its by way of draconian definitions that it gets that term. It has about the same alcohol content as kombucha.
I think the question is why is it strange? Do your friends feel strange getting drunk around a sober person? If that were the case, tough luck. Or maybe they were never really friends.
We each have to walk our own path towards the future we want to see. At the end of the day, if you see your future brighter sober, don’t care what others think. And real friends will understand.
If it’s a work related thing, like I mentioned in another thread, as your doctor for a fabricated medical excuse. He/she should be happy to do this as it means you are not drinking.
I don’t think anyone meant to come off as being a dick. But on a sober forum, asking if drinking a drink with 2.5% alcohol is ok is gonna get some honest answers.
As stated above, yes you drank. If you ask is it or isn’t it, it is. Sobriety is like the honor system. We can tell anyone that we didn’t drink and all it is doing is hurting ourselves. As alcoholics and addicts, the only real opinion is our own. We might have sought treatment for someone else but we stay sober for us. When we choose the life of sobriety, it’s all or nothing. If we pick and choose then try and rationalize drinking, we are no longer in recovery we’re active in our addiction. We’re sober or we’re not. Those who answered “like a dick” are telling it like it is. As alcoholics and addicts, we know every trick in the book. We’re masters of twisting and turning situations to fit our needs. When someone asks us what we think, we’re going to tell them. We don’t sugar coat it or water it down. I’m very serious about my recovery and would never knowingly put myself in a situation or position where i might be tempted to use. We’re here to help each other, which in turn allows us to pay it forward, as those before us paid it forward for us.
Honestly, I can see how my cocaine comparison could come off as dickish and that’s cool. When I was drinking and using I never saw the craziness in my own actions but I could certainly see it in others. That’s why I showed the OP how crazy his statement would sound coming from someone else. Sometimes when we see things in a different light we can process it better. Dicks or not something that someone said stuck bc OP didn’t drink.
