Dont know what I'm doing

So me and my girlfriend are “on a break” indefinitely until we are ready to work things out. She said we both need to work on ourselves but I knew she was just trying to be nice by not pointing out my obvious alcohol issue for the millionth time and that I was the problem. My 4 or 5 beers every day were finally too much for her… I’m officially at the bottom now and I am one day sober now. I dont know if I’ll be able to stay sober and thats what worries me. I know if I dont stop drinking I’m gonna be losing the love of my life. Sorry for the long post but its been an emotional day and I’m trying something new. Wish me luck


Sounds like you have a pretty good idea of what you’re doing.

You’ve identified alcohol as a problem in your life, and you’re reflecting on how you can repair the damage done by alcohol.

Next step would be to become active, and work for your sobriety, work on yourself as a person.

I used AA, IOP group and a therapist to get a better understanding of myself and learn how to live a happier more productive life.

My advice, try some stuff that’s sobriety related, putting down the drink is but a small part of the equation, cause when you stop drinking you open a void in your life, feelings, time and relationships all change.

And most of all, nothing is worth drinking over, ride the wave of the crave and reach out for help.


Thanks for the advice. I actually registered through my job for a employee assistance programs that provide free professional help for people that need it for a few sessions at least. Gonna make an appointment with a psychologist/therapist tomorrow.

Idk if aa would be right for me but I would try it. What is an iop group.

Also full disclosure ive been drinking every day for two years atleast. How bad are the withdrawals? Ive used pills a few times and used to smoke but ive heard horror stories about alcohol withdrawals

I used EAP a few years ago, the counselor I saw prescribed me some IOP (intensive outpatient group) which is basically 3 meetings, 3 times a week for about 3 hours that’s lead by a substance abuse counselor. I figured I was pretty well cured after I graduated and had about 6 months sober, not long after I was back to over a 5th a day.

I’ve been sober for 22+ months this time, cause I gave up the fight, stopped thinking I needed sobriety and started wanting it, at all costs. I did everything suggested to me, to help me to maintain sobriety and so far it’s worked, life’s gotten pretty good thanks to sobriety.

As far as withdrawals, they really very from person to person, my withdrawals were pretty mild, lots of sweating, sweaty palms (always refused to hold hands at the end of a meeting cause they’d be dripping lol) restless legs for a few months, shitty sleep for a few months, typical mood swinging behavior for the first 2 months or so, light shakes, mild heart palpitations. I drank at least a 5th of vodka a day, usually more. Just be prepared to be lethargic, prickly, not sleep well and you’ll be okay. Stay hydrated, eat some decent food and a multivitamin. If you get severe shakes or heart palpitations I’d hit the ER or see your pcp pronto.


I hope the best for you. It’s good to hear that you’re willing to make the decision to get sober. Going to meetings helps me to stay sober and stay plugged in. Meetings are great for finding additional support. I’m also in an IOP group right now. For me, once I started working on myself, good things started coming my way. Good luck in your journey towards recovery.


Maybe try a AA meeting they will help wish you well


I’ve used EAP when my co-workers died. I told them I was in recovery and both times they told me to stay close to AA (obviously I was going to anyway) but it helps to have professionals tell me the same thing.


Hi how are u getting on today ?

Hey nat ,it will be 3 days after hours it was ok yesterday because I was busy but today I have to sit will myself and I know its something I really need to work on as sitting with myself and thoughts Ali beleive is the most toughest of all to cohncer…I feel alone today but I know a man or sex is not going to fix that I spilt up from someone I gave him my complete trust and he broke it and it destroyed me fully that’s hurting today but I know in the long run it was the best thing to do as I need to work on me …I’m staying clean today but it’s are you today my fellow addict friend.xx

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It’s so hard to begin with sitting by ourselves. In the beginning I was always on here reaching out I was a very frightened soul . I’m so proud u r on day 3 it does get better i promise you . I’m doing ok thankyou I find working my 12steps programme really helps me through my days . The more I connect to my fellow addict the more support and advice I get . So sorry about your split up I know it’s painful but you can get through this and be the person you deserve to be x

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