I have been through hell. When my addiction REALLY started I was so naive to what f.cked up can of bullsh.t I was about to unleash.
I opened my home to a bunch of tweakers. They took over my home and I was to nice to keep my door shut. I was going broke. My things were being stolen. And untimely I lost my apartment.
Homeless tweakers are like stray cats. Give em a meal pet em a little and give them a cozy spot to sleep and they keep coming back. Every hour. No matter what time. My house was the methhead sanctuary.
My mental health was detirorating rapidly which led me in hospital with 8 stitches in my arm. 4 months later the nerves are still not right. But my hand is functional. Praise the Lord for that at least.
My landlord threw everything out of my place while me and the boyfriend weren’t home. All my furniture and belongings stacked higher than the state of empire. An absolute koatic mess. I picked a few of my things out and I left everything else. Where would I put it all?
So. Me and my partner are officially homeless. He began dealing and I stayed in hotel. And things kept spiraling even more out of control.
I’m going to skip most the really bad parts… abuse. Psychosis. But eventually we couldnt afford hotel living anymore. So we’d stay different places sleep outside stay awake whenever we had nowhere to go.
Somehow I still don’t know how. My partner got into a lot of trouble. It became really dangerous for us… I was scared. People started street bullying me and treating me like shit. Digging for info. Talking in code words and phrases I didn’t understand. They knew I was new to street life and I was gullible and naive and they played me like a fiddle
And then things got bad enough I went to detox. Little did I know the person I became friends with… followed me into detox. He was a brother to a dangerous person that wanted my boyfriend dead or alive… so there I am in detox… sharpening a toothbrush in my room. On day 10.
I left detox. My boyfriend picked me up. And were being followed the entire time but we know this. And were not concerned. If they wanted us dead it would have happened a long time ago. I still don’t know what’s going on at this point and never did get a straight answer. All I know is theres a bounty.
My partner claims he doesn’t actually know why either… do I believe that…? I don’t.
So I’m immediately back in the pipe. Fastforward. I’m 24 hours out of detox. And were both being arrested.
Were pulled over by the police. The vehicle is reported stolen. And they searched the car. There’s drugs. And a gun… with shells. Were put in different police cruisers. They asked a few questions and let me go. As for my person… jail.
When I was free to go I walked to where I’m frimiliar. Half hour after being arrested someone tried to punch me in the face with a metal flash light. Luckily I dodged it and to my literal surprise reflex I grabbed his arm and cocked my fist all the way back. He was so lucky I didn’t start whaling on him if I hadn’t just been arrested.
After this… I went back to my home town. Where there’s literally no drugs and nothing to do. I had nowhere else to go that was safe. So this is where I’m at now. Completely bored out of my mind but I’m safe. And I’m sober. And even tho my person is locked up… he is safe… and he is sober…
He calls me everyday says he misses me and loves me… and for the first time he said “I choose you over the drugs… I really do this time. I just want you to know I choose you.” And I believe him.
Weve loved each other for 4 long years and were still madly in love with each other. I think we will pull through this time. He’s looking at a 3 year sentence… but I’ll wait.
