DUIs. A rant

Got something to get off my chest. I can’t imagine it will make me many friends. Trigger warning for anyone going through a dui process right now, I guess.

The number of people on here who get caught drunk driving, and then complain about their punishment is astounding.

You got behind the wheel of a 3,000lb chunk of metal that has been effectively weaponised by your inabilty to operate it safely, and you’re what? Looking for sympathy? A way to avoid your punishment? I’ve read dozens of threads on here where people have insisted they are remorseful and willing to accept the punishment and then in the next sentence asked for advice on how to get off with a lighter sentence. You’re not remorseful, you’re sorry you were caught.

Theres a story in the UK press today about some fuck that hit and killed a two week old baby in a pram. I don’t know if they were drunk, but it is a sharp reminder of the kind of risk you were willing to put out in the world by drunk driving.

I just can’t believe the amount of sympathy people have for drunk drivers on here. Roll on the claims of how judgemental I’m being.

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I’ve driven more times drunk than I can count. I’ve had a cop stop me, noticed I was cocked. Dude took me to the VA Hospital nearby, left me there, went back, got my car, parked it in the nearby gas station and dropped off the keys back at the VA Hospital along with a big, fat traffic ticket.
When I woke up, the nurse scolded me and called me the luckiest fucker alive. I called the cop a few weeks later and thanked him, paid the ticket and never drove drunk again. A few months later, I started my sobriety. I hope that pisses yah off ^.^

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I have driven drunk too many times than I can remember. The only thing I’ve ever hit was a road divider.

I got caught by cops a couple of times but got off both times with a night in jail. The reason the cops let me off so lightly, as they told you later, was that I wasn’t really driving dangerously. They were routine traffic stops to catch terrorists (we have a bit of terrorism from time to time in our country).

I am not proud of my drunk driving skills or my luck so far. Drunk driving is a big no no. Thankfully/unfortunately in the city I live in, traffic is usually so bad, thate nobody can really drive fast. At least not within the city. So fatal drunk driving accidents are quite rare (except for crazy bikers in souped up bikes).

Don’t drive if you are drunk. Just order an Uber and try to be polite to the driver. It’s makes life so much more simpler.

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Why would that piss me off?

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Rant acknowledged. :wink:

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Why are you complaining about people coming on here to vent their frustration’s concerning their DUI’s?

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Because people are trying to find a way out of facing the consequences for one of the most dangerous things you can do while drunk. Even worse, they’re doing it while claiming to be remorseful

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Perhaps people are hurting. Maybe they are not trying to find a way out. Maybe they are just trying to convince themselves, forgive themselves, by writing the words down. Hoping that there is someone compassionate out there willing to listen to them. Maybe understand the pain.

As adicts we all hate ourselves. Don’t we?

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I fully agree

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You are absolutely right about the actions and consequences @Kipper.

Those topics though, are usually not about actions and consequences alone, but about people who admit their mistakes and admit their problems.
Yes, they made mistakes. And yes, you are entitled an opinion on it and yes, you are allowed to judge them on it.

In a similar way, we are entitled an opinion and we are allowed to be forgiving, hoping they will be self-forgiving.

I don’t have to tell them how wrong that action is. Believe me, they allready know that.

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I agree with you here. Everyone wants to be understood and get some compassion. At the same time, someone wanting all the compassion in the world for potentially loosing their license for drunk driving, not for the first time, on a freaking sobriety forum, that had my temper quicken aswell. :eyes: A bit of perspective would do some ppl good. I understand @Kipper’s frustration. I just didn’t engage. Stuck to my side of the street on that one. :v:

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Yeah I’ve tried doing the same, not engaging, but I read something on another post this morning that just tipped me over the edge.

@Fargesia_murielae I agree with you, and people do deserve compassion, much more than I’m capable of giving, but the repeat offenders, in some places almost proud of having gotten away with drink driving for so long, makes me sick to my stomach.

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On here, I never bring anyone down a peg in whatever circumstance they find themselves in. Be it a DUI, Domestic issues, Rehab issues or just plain old life issues. Rather than criticize I sympathize and offer whatever advice I can. Some here beat me to it and offer way better council than I would have offered. The only point of tension with me here is when someone comes and tries to justify their drinking.
This particular topic is leaning towards bringing people down and I can’t fathom why someone would do that to another person who wants to just let it all out on a place where people are trying to get sober from God knows what. Who else are they going to vent to? Their neighbor, family friends? People who are already judgmental?

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@Kipper. I hear what you are saying. I read the DUI posts because they motivate me to NOT drink and drive. One more tool to help keep me sober. Sometimes they are, like you say, more of an effort to seek advice to avoid punishment. There is a certain despair in the posts, too. They f-ed up and know it.

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If we leave out the “weight” of those offenses, but just look at the processes, in what way are they different from anyone of us who is, or has been in denial ?

We all took the fall, or one day wíll take the fall.

I am grateful my fall wasn’t that hard. And I feel sorry for those who will fall much harder and deeper.
I don’t judge them, for I know one day they will judge themselves.

In a way I agree with you, I understand your point of view.
But instead of victims and offenders, I see victims and other victims.

No one wins anything, all involved eventually loose. A lot. Most are aware of that, a few not yet. But even that one person I think you referred to, even that woman will one day wake up and hate what she sees in the mirror.

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While I do understand your feeling, I think pretty much everyone on here has done awful things drunk, like sick to our stomach regret. It makes it feel hypocritical to judge others. And our drunk selves do things that our sober selves can hardly believe, and our sober self wants to avoid the worst consequences of our drunk self. It is not good, but it is human.

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Most addicts and alcoholics I know of already judge themselves quite harshly. Never found a really happy one.

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3dwis here and I got everything I deserved, never look for sympathy in that lol. It was my dumb ass choice… Went without a license for 8 years… Hey thats the price you pay, all you can do is own it and move on and do the next right thing… But very true I see alot of ppl look for sympathy on it

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When I got a DUI I did not remember drinking because, although I didn’t know it at the time, I had a brain haemorrhage/subdural haematoma which caused confusion and amnesia. Prior to that I had not drunk for over three months. Do I think I was unlucky? Not when I later tested myself once in the AFTERNOON the day after I drank and found I was still over the limit. I cannot honestly say therefore how many times I have drink driven and just not known it. So I cannot expect sympathy and I cannot judge anyone else.

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Never gotten a DUI. Though I certainly deserved one. And I was also one of those people that was proud of that before I got sober. This post is 100 accurate.

Addiction may have caused my shitty behavior but it certainly doesn’t excuse it

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