I identify with this so much! It does not seem to matter how mechanically simple a task is, I still get easily overwhelmed. The task says to me, “I am a small task and I’d like to get done today please,” but through a megaphone, with sirens, threatening legal action if I do not comply. I understand the task is reasonable and well within my capacity, but my brain responds as if it is threatened and does its best to keep me away.
Through mindfulness I have learned to dig deep into the truth of what I’m experiencing and how I feel about it, and get some space as perspective to respond instead of react. It took a lot of practice, but I can sometimes see now where I go from “Ok, a task” to “OMG ANOTHER TASK”, and try to undo the catastrophic reaction to get back to that elusive grown ass adult that is, in fact, still alive and well inside.
CBT has taught me skills for changing thought patterns like this over time, and in turn, my resulting behaviour. Mostly I’ve just been able to apply it to anxiety so far, but I’m slowly becoming more able to address more and more aspects of how I think.
It helps me to remind myself that these tasks are a normal part of life, not an “event” that is happening “to” me, and tell myself “I’m just as capable as anyone else to get this done, it doesn’t actually hurt me to do it. Don’t believe me? Just WATCH me. I’ll prove it.”
Clearly distinguishing what is and isn’t important to get done also helps. I can easily guilt myself into facing a longer to do list than fits in my day, which indirectly sends me the message that not every task will get done, even though I think it should. This gives too much room for me to compromise and put off tasks once again, even though I’ve already wasted energy stressing about them!
For the especially stubborn ones, I may sometimes mention to someone that I’m going to do it and leverage some accountability.
But really it’s the mindfulness and CBT that is helping me the most. When I’m successful with it, I can notice my feeling overwhelmed, and figure out how to disengage from the wayward cognitive processing that abducts me from reality and into the dysfunction. It’s almost like magic sometimes, but usually tricky AF, and my success rate is not yet where I want it to be.
I am hopeful, and have reason to believe, that as we get better at tackling our tasks, we will also learn that they’re not so overwhelming after all, and it will get easier.
